No time to cry

Prologue

Six months later…

Andrew starred out the window of the cabin for the hundredth time that afternoon, waiting for any sign from Rose. He could hear Carla clamoring around in the kitchen and the smell of fresh coffee filled his senses and caused a sad smile to cross his face as his mind traveled back to the last normal moment he could even remember in the last several months. A time when even though they had all been on edge, at least things had been right between the five of them. That day on the island before everything had gone drastically downhill.

He remembered his best friend’s laughter as he and Tess had teased her over how long it took her to make a choice on what flavor coffee she was going to purchase. They had all chuckled as he had finally put his hands over her eyes and made her point to the beverage menu in a forced blind choice. Once the coffee had been purchased, she had gotten even with him at the magazine rack as her dark eyes had centered on an article heading, which read "Do Angels Exist". She had turned mischievous eyes to her best friend and had quipped,

"What do you think, Angel Boy?" Causing a few customers to throw curious glances their way.

Andrew shook his head as he remembered, and though he wasn’t sure, he had a feeling that day may have been the last day he had heard her laugh or seen her smile. It had certainly been the last day he had heard Tess tease them gently, as in the days following, all she seemed to turn their way was anger, for reasons he only partially understood. Now, he hadn’t even seen his old supervisor since before that assignment had ended and Rose had taken on the role of acting supervisor for the three angels.

Monica, he had seen, but only a few times since that assignment and he was as puzzled over her as he had been about Tess. But even more than that, he was just plain worried. His dearest friend seemed to have undergone a complete personality change, seemingly withdrawing into herself and only wanting to work. Where there had been a time when a day off with friends had been something special to be treasured, now she declined the offers, telling Rose she was fine and just wanted to keep working.

Now, he hadn’t seen her in two months and along with worrying about her, he missed her terribly. Though he would never admit it, he missed Tess as well and when he was able to put his anger aside for a few minutes, he really wished she were here. Though he and Rose were close, there had always been a special bond between he, Tess and Monica, and right now, he longed to be able to talk to someone who knew the Irish angel almost as well as he did. On top of that, he had so many questions on why Tess had reacted the way she had on their last assignment that he so wanted her to answer.

His thoughts were interrupted as Rose appeared in the room with him, her eyes already betraying what she was about to say.

"Rose?" He asked, unable to keep a twinge of hope from his eyes, as he saw Carla come out of the kitchen, a pensive expression on her face.

"She said ‘no’, honey," Rose shook her head softly,

"And I can’t force her to take time off when she is handling her assignments beautifully."

"How is she, Rose?" Carla asked, her green eyes that matched Andrew’s filled with sadness and concern.

"She’s exhausted. I can see it in her eyes, but something is driving her," Rose sighed softly, knowing exactly what that "something" was, but also knowing she had made a promise to Carla a long time ago.

"Any sign of Tess?" Andrew asked quietly, his hurt and disappointment evident in his handsome features.

"No, honey," She replied, reaching to give his hand a squeeze, seeing the pain in his eyes. She knew Andrew had been hurting for months now, partially over Tess and all that had transpired, but also over his longing to help his best friend, who didn’t appear to be accepting help from anyone right now,

"We’ll keep trying, Andrew…with both of them."

"Sure, Rose," He whispered as he pulled away and headed up the steps to his room.

****

Monica shivered as she opened the door to the coffee house, anxious to get out of the cold February weather and into some place warm and hopefully comforting. Looking around her through tired eyes, she could see that the place was practically deserted as she made her way to a small table in the back of the room.

Not bothering to remove her coat, as she still felt cold, she sat down and ordered a cup of coffee as she rubbed her hands together trying to warm them. She knew she was supposed to meet her assignment here later, but she had decided to arrive early in order to have a little time to think and to pull herself together after the last one which had been more difficult than she wanted to admit.

Heather had been a victim of sexual abuse, and though the circumstances were still so different, once the assignment had finished last night, the Irish angel had found herself in her hotel room, shaking uncontrollably for the most of the night, before she had finally forced herself to put the painful feelings aside once again. But last night and the memories that went with it, had left her shaken and she had known when Rose had appeared to give her time off, that there was no way she could have faced her friends at this time.

Hearing the bell on the door jingle, the angel looked up, and surprise registering on her face as she saw a painfully familiar figure moving towards her. Rising to her feet, and forgetting all about things that had happened between them in the past, she found herself moving across the room and was soon caught up in the arms of her friend,

"Tess…" She whispered, holding onto her tightly.

"Hello, baby," Tess replied, her voice rich and warm as she hugged her friend tightly.

"I’ve missed you," Monica uttered, pulling away and seeing sadness in her friend’s eyes,

"What are you doing here?"

Tess gently ushered Monica back to the table so they could sit down and after a moment, she reached across the table to take the younger angel’s hand,

"I’m here for a few reasons, baby girl," She began softly, feeling tears in her eyes,

"First is to apologize to you, Monica, for everything that happened on that last assignment we were on together. I made a mess of it, Angel Girl and I hurt you, which is something I’m having a hard time forgiving myself for.."

"It’s okay, Tess, really…" Monica replied, not wanting to think about any part of that assignment.

"No, sweetheart, it’s not okay. I had no right to raise a hand to you, or to walk away when you and Carla needed me, but I was just feeling so badly. I know Andrew is still probably furious and I need to make things up to him as well, but I wanted to start with you. I was just so afraid for you, Angel Girl, and that fear showed itself in the form of anger and that was wrong."

Monica gave Tess’ hand a gentle squeeze,

"It was a difficult assignment, Tess and we all made mistakes. I’m just so happy to see you."

Tess eyed her young friend with concern, not seeing any sign of happiness emulating from her at all,

"The other reason I’m here to find out what exactly is going on with you."

A brief look of panic flowed across Monica’s features before disappearing altogether,

"What do you mean, Tess?"

"I’ve heard all the rumors, Miss Wings; you working non-stop, refusing days off and that isn’t like you. There’s something going on with you and we both know it." Tess’ eyes never left Monica’s face even when the younger angel lowered her eyes to the tabletop.

"I’m not going to lie and tell you nothing is wrong, Tess," She said finally, after a long silence,

"But I will tell you that I can’t talk about it. But I’m okay, really. I’ve put it behind me at any rate--."

"You haven’t put anything behind you, Monica," Tess observed calmly,

"You’ve buried whatever it was, is what you’ve done. I can look at you and see that much. And all this working you’re doing…you can tell yourself whatever you want, but the fact is that you’re hiding behind it. And since when do you not take days off? You’re exhausted, Monica. Now, what is it, baby? What is hurting you so much?"

Feeling panic beginning to well up inside of her as she wanted no part of these questions that she couldn’t answer, she looked up sharply,

"Tess, I don’t have time for this right now. I have an assignment--."

"Which brings me to the third reason I’m here, baby," She interrupted gently,

"You’re assignment has been given to another angel and you’ve been placed on indefinite hiatus until further notice. In a few minutes, you’ll be meeting up with Andrew, Rose and Carla at the cabin."

"I didn’t ask for any time off, Tess," She responded shakily.

"I know you didn’t, but God knows what is best, even for His angels, Monica and He knows what you need right now is time." Tess sighed softly as she watched Monica’s eyes drop once more, knowing this was not the news her friend wanted to hear.

"And what about you?" She whispered weakly.

Tess drew in a nervous breath, her next words causing Monica to look back up in surprise,

"I’m coming with you, baby."

Chapter 1

Tess and Monica entered the cabin an hour later, each lost in their own thoughts-Monica unable to believe that the Father had ordered her to take a break from her work, but also feeling nervous, while Tess kept hoping and praying that Andrew would forgive her like Monica had. Each angel took in the familiar cozy atmosphere of the cabin and a small smile played on Monica’s face as she remembered the last time she was here with Andrew, sharing memories of the past and just having a good time being with one another.

"Tess? Monica?"

The familiar voice of Carla called out as she came out of the kitchen and her green eyes widened as she spotted the two angels. Making a dash over to them, she enveloped each one in a quick hug before finally looking at them in the eyes,

"I didn’t think I’d see you two again…"

"It’s great to see you, baby," Tess whispered, her brown eyes nervous as she looked at her third "Angel Baby",

"How are you doing, Carla?"

Not really quite sure of what to say in answer to the older angel’s question, Carla opened her mouth and was about to reply when Andrew’s voice interrupted from the top of the staircase.

"Tess??"

Gulping as she heard her "Angel Boy" calling her name, Tess turned her head and faced the younger angel for the first time in 6 months. He was standing at the top of the stairs and he appeared to be unsure of what else to say to her, but even from where he stood, Tess saw that his green eyes flickered hope and that brought some hope to her own heart.

Sucking in a deep breath and taking a shaky step towards him as he descended the stairs, Tess stopped as she finally came face to face with her other baby. Yes, she had been worried about how Monica would react to seeing her again, but this time when she had to face her other charge, her worry only continued to grow.

"Hello, Andrew," She greeted him, trying to keep her voice from shaking so much.

Seeing him nod his head, his eyes still on her, Tess took another deep breath and took a step closer to him. Knowing she was treading on thin ice here, but unable to stop herself, Tess reached her arms out and wrapped them around her friend. Realizing that he appeared to not want her to get too close or warm with him at that moment, Tess felt him briefly hug her back before pulling away quickly, like she was fire.

She tried to meet his eyes again as he separated himself from her, but he only allowed it for a brief moment, and after he forced a tiny smile for her sake, Andrew spotted Monica behind her with Carla and he walked around the older angel to his best friend. No words were spoken between the two younger angels as Andrew reached his arms out and grabbed her up in a tight embrace. Feeling her hold him tightly back, Andrew only tightened his arms around her as he laid tiny kisses on her cheeks and forehead. Resting his cheek on the crown of her head and letting out a soft sigh, the angel closed his teary green eyes for a brief moment before gently pulling away.

"Baby girl, it’s so good to see you," He whispered, trying to keep his emotions under control as he had finally come face to face with not only his best friend, but also Tess.

"I’ve missed you, Andrew," She uttered back, trying to keep her own tears at bay and finally succeeding. The little Irish angel wrapped her arms once more around his waist tightly and held onto him,

"I’ve missed you so much…"

As the two young angels continued to hold onto one another for what seemed like an eternity, Tess and Carla exchanged glances and an uncomfortable silence filled the living room.

*****

Late that night, at past 3AM when she suspected everyone was sleeping, Carla walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water, considering she couldn’t sleep again. Over the past 6 months, it had been difficult to get any sleep during the night; some nightmares had followed when she had tried to sleep-most of them being about Philip and her own attack, but another good part of the nightmares came from what she knew about what had happened to Monica.

And her promise to never tell Andrew about it. Deep inside, she knew that she was lying to him, and that brought a great weight onto her heart.

Sighing softly and stretching her arms over her head, Carla pushed open the swinging doors of the kitchen and immediately saw Andrew sitting at the table with his back to her. A cup of juice was sitting on the table in front of him, but he appeared to not even be drinking it, instead his mind was off in a different world.

"Couldn’t sleep either, Andrew?" Carla spoke up, watching as her friend turned around in his seat and looked at her, his own green eyes tired and stressed.

"I haven’t been able to sleep a lot these last few months, Carla," Andrew responded, turning back around as he sensed Carla walking over to him and taking the seat beside of him,

"More often than not, I find myself coming into the kitchen to think in these early hours…I’ve got quite a bit on my mind, ya know?"

"We all do, Andrew," Carla smiled sadly at him as she laid a hand gently on his own hand, the one that wasn’t fiddling with his cup,
"We all know how you feel-"

"Do you?" Andrew eyed his friend with a raised eyebrow,

"Carla…I can tell that Monica is hiding something. But she just won’t talk to me about it, as you know. I know her more than she knows herself, and I would have thought that she’d talk to me about this. She’s been acting very strange ever since the rescue 6 months ago…and she’s acting like nothing is the matter since I saw her this afternoon, when I can TELL that something is the matter. Carla…Something else happened that day she helped to save you; I know it. Will you tell me what that is?"

"Andrew-"

"Carla, I know that you know something, too," Andrew interrupted, reaching for her hand and holding it tightly in his own,

"What did she tell you?"

"Andrew, I-I can’t yet…" Carla stuttered, trying to remain as strong as possible as she held tightly to his hand,

"Yes, something did happen…but-Monica made me swear not to tell you-"

"But why?" He frowned worriedly as he released her hand and looked down at his cup,

"What could have happened that was so…so HORRIBLE that she can tell you, but not me?"

"Maybe that’s none of your business, Andrew." Both angels heard Monica snap and they both whirled around at the sound of her voice.

"Monica!" They both cried out and with a glance at Carla, Andrew stood to his feet, legs starting to shake as he heard what she had said to him, and took a step towards her. But his heart broke all over again as he saw his best friend back away from him,

"Monica, that’s not what I mean-"

"No, it is what you want to know, Andrew," Monica’s voice shook as she kept her distance from her friend,

"And I’m telling you to stay out of it for now. Yes, I did tell Carla, but I cannot tell you; understand that?"

"Monica, I don’t get this!" Andrew objected, his green eyes filling with tears. Carla looked back and forth between her two friends and she felt tears fill her own eyes at the sight of the hurt Monica was inflicting now on the older angel,

"I just don’t get this-"

"And you never will," Monica shot a stubborn look at him one last time before turning on her heel and departing from the kitchen, leaving Andrew and Carla looking after her in stunned silence.

*****

An hour after Carla had gone off to bed for the second time that night, Andrew continued sitting at the kitchen table, his mind now on the argument he had just had with his best friend. Her words haunted his mind and now he knew that he wouldn’t be able to get any sleep. Angrily wiping at the stray tears that clung to his lashes, Andrew turned back to the cup of orange juice in his hands and finally headed over to the sink and dumped it down the drain.

Walking back to the kitchen table and slumping down in it, Andrew rested his head in his hands and tried once again to comprehend what was going on in this cabin: He and Tess were still at odds, and although he was relieved to have seen her that afternoon, he also felt some old anger coming back inside of him for her. He knew that it would have been just plain rude to had not returned her greeting when she had reached for him, so although he didn’t want her too close at that moment, he also wanted her to know that he didn’t hate her; he could never hate this angel whom he had known for centuries and beyond.

And then there was Monica and her silence-and her resolve to just work and not take any vacations or breaks. And of course, her refusal to talk to him about it. Did he do something to hurt her without even knowing it? Deep down, he knew that couldn’t be the case; he had made sure after she had been jealous of his friendship with the Angel of Death Brianna, that if she was hurting by something he had done or whatever, to let him know and they could work it out. But again, she refused to talk to him, no matter how much his mind was telling him that something was terribly wrong…and he still had that gut feeling that Carla knew.

And Rose.

He had thought his former supervisor would never keep anything from him, but now it seemed that she was, much to his discouragement.

‘Father, what is going on?’ He silently pleaded as he rested his head in his hands and allowed the tears to fall from his green eyes,

‘Please tell me…’

But before he could even begin to listen to what the Father had to say-or even if He would tell him at all-Tess’ voice broke into his pleas behind him and he whirled around just as she spoke his name.

"Andrew?"

Chapter 2

"Tess." Andrew uttered, his surprise evident as he began to wonder if any of them were sleeping tonight. Getting up, he walked back over to the sink, too nervous to remain seated.

"You can’t sleep either, I see," She remarked, tentatively taking a seat at the table and wondering if he would join her.

"So far, Rose is the only one who can," He replied, a look of uncertainty still in his green eyes. He leaned up against the counter and sighed softly, remembering how he had so longed to talk to her over the last few weeks.

"Andrew, I wanted to tell you," Tess hesitated, wondering if now was even the right time,

"I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry…about everything that happened…I just--."

Andrew held his hand up to stop her from saying anymore,

"Not now, Tess, please? I’m not trying to be rude, but there are just other things on my mind right now."

Though slightly hurt, Tess had known this was not going to be easy when she had walked in here tonight, and she nodded her head,

"Like Monica?"

He hesitated for a moment before nodding his head,

"Just don’t tell me that you know what is wrong too and that I’m the only one left in the dark here about my best friend."

"I’m as in the dark as you are, I’m afraid. I didn’t realize that Carla and Rose knew what was going on," Seeing him nodding once more, she sighed softly,

"I could tell something was terribly wrong as soon as I saw her today. It’s buried deep, Andrew, but it’s there and I get the feeling that once it does come out, it’s going to cause her a lot of pain. She’s harboring it now and keeping it at bay, but only at an arm’s length. I get the feeling that whatever this is, it is moving through her faster than she could ever run from it."

"But what is it, Tess?" Andrew cried out, tears in his eyes at her words. Against his will, he sat down at the table beside of her, unable to help himself,

"I love her so much and to see her hurting like this and not knowing why…" He sighed softly, his heart aching,

"Do you know how long she has before she has to go back to work?"

"However long it takes, Angel--," She stopped herself, remembering his words on the ship six months ago,

"This isn’t really a vacation, Andrew, it’s more like disability time. The Father knows her heart is heavy and that she can’t keep going the way she was," Hesitantly, she reached across the table and laid her hand over his, watching as he started to pull away, but then stopped himself,

"She needs help, Andrew."

"But how can I help her when I don’t know what is so wrong?" He whispered, trying to stop the tears from falling,

"I haven’t seen her this withdrawn since all those years ago after Kathleen took her and she thought she was going to lose us. She doesn’t want me to know, Tess."

"She wouldn’t tell me either, Andrew… she said she had ‘put it behind’ her, but she’s lying, not so much to us, but to herself," She weighed her next words carefully, wanting them to see how they applied not only to this situation, but the one between the two of them as well,

"Things like this can only stay inside so long, Andrew, as they become like a disease. The truth has to come out, regardless of how much it hurts in order for healing to begin."

He met his eyes squarely with hers as he pulled his hand away and then rose from his chair,

"I’m going to try to get some sleep, Tess. You should probably do the same." With a nod of his head, he left the kitchen and Tess.

Tess sighed softly, knowing this road was going to be a hard one, for all of them.

****

Before dawn, and still unable to sleep, Andrew quietly opened the door to his best friend's room, wanting to check on her despite the words she had spoken in the kitchen during the night.

Quietly slipping inside, his eyes came to rest upon her even as they filled with tears. Though asleep, she was curled up tightly, her slight form trembling, despite the heavy comforter. Carefully sitting on the edge of her bed, he watched her sadly as his hand moved to brush her hair back away from her face,

"Why won’t you talk to me, baby girl?" He whispered softly.

In her dream, Monica could feel Philip’s hand reaching out to touch her hair, and she shrank away, desperate to not have him hurt her,

"No!" She cried out, as in a desperate attempt to stop him, she swung her fists wildly.

Startled, Andrew quickly took hold of her arms as she began to cry out and swing blindly as if fighting off an invisible enemy,

"Monica! Monica, wake up!"

"No…no…don’t hurt me, please…" She whimpered, her words tearing into his heart, as he shook her gently.

"Wake up, sweetheart…you’re dreaming, that’s all…" His heart was racing as he saw her finally open exhausted eyes as she looked around the room, a look of complete and utter terror on her face. Reaching over, he stroked her cheek gently,

"It was a dream, baby, that’s all."

Her mind came flooding back to the present as her eyes met with Andrew’s briefly, before she lowered them and nodded her head.

Andrew could see the tears nearing the surface, but she quickly forced them back and he sighed softly, his worry for her deepening.

"I’m sorry, about earlier," She said after a long silence between them,

"I…haven’t been sleeping very well and I over-reacted."

Carefully, he reached for her hand and felt her grip it back tightly,

"Monica, I want so much to help you, but you won’t tell me what this is all about. Why-."

Reaching up with her other hand, she gently covered his mouth with her fingers as she shook her head,

"Please Andrew. Please don’t ask me things I can’t answer. This is hard enough as it is and I don’t want to lie to you, so please, just don’t ask. I’m okay…"

"Monica, you are not ‘okay’," He replied, taking her hand away from his face and holding onto it as well,

"You’re as far away from ‘okay’ as I have ever seen you, sweetheart. Let me help you."

"You can’t," She whispered shakily, knowing for him to know about what happened and the shame she felt, would devastate him, not to mention that she was sure that if she fell apart, she would never be the same again.

"At least let me try, baby," He pleaded with her, tears in his eyes.

"I can’t," Monica uttered, once again forcing back tears,

"Please Andrew, I’m so tired…I just want to sleep," Wearily she laid back down, longing to lose herself and all the hurt in her mind and heart to slumber.

Andrew nodded his head, clearly seeing her exhaustion and her strong resolve to not tell him what it was that was hurting her so,

"Would it be okay with you if I sat with you for awhile at least?" He whispered, longing to do something, anything…

Her sad brown eyes met with his, even as a look of her strong love for him flashed in them,

"I’d like that, Andrew," She whispered, closing her eyes as she felt the comfort of his hand stroking her hair.

He watched as she finally fell into an exhausted sleep, though he still continued to sit with her,

"Then this is where I’ll be," He whispered back to her sleeping form.

****

"Have you had a chance to talk to Andrew at all, Tess?" Rose asked late the next morning as the two of them sat in the kitchen drinking tea.

"I tried to last night, Rose, but he really wanted no part of it. I’m not sure if it is all because he is so worried about Monica, or if part of it is that he is just unwilling to forgive me for everything." Tess replied with a sigh,

"I know I made a mess of things, but you know how much I love those two babies, Rose."

"I know, Tess," Rose replied softly, taking her friend’s hand,

"Give him some time and he’ll come around. I’m sure of it."

Tess nodded her head and was quiet for a moment before speaking,

"You know don’t you? You know what is going on with my Angel Girl?"

Rose sighed and regretfully nodded her head,

"I do, Tess, not that she told me. I would tell you if I could, as it is really Andrew that she doesn’t want to know the truth, but for you to know…well, for Andrew to be the only one not to know would hurt him deeply when he wants so much to help her."

Tess nodded her head in understanding,

"Is it bad, Rose? Sometimes Monica can blow things out of proportion a little; she’s just so sensitive…"

"Not this time, Tess, I’m afraid," Rose replied sadly, her heart aching for both Monica and Andrew,

"I’m not sure another angel has ever dealt with what she is going through and her refusal to seek help from her friends or the Father concerns me even more. That along with other things…"

"What ‘other things’, Rose?"

Rose looked at her friend with regret in her blue eyes,

"Exactly how our Angel Boy is going to handle all of this when the truth comes out."

Chapter 3

16-year old Beth Harris stood in front of her mirror in her bedroom, gazing at her reflection. Her blue eyes looked back at her and she sucked in a deep breath before letting it out slowly. Today was the day…the day that she hoped to find the angel whom had saved her life over 6 months ago. Her faith in the Lord was strong, so she knew that He would lead her to where she needed to go.

Lifting a hand up and fingering the cross necklace hanging around her neck, the young girl lifted her chin and turned away from the mirror, reaching down and grabbing her jacket. She had already left a note for her parents, who were gone for the whole day, telling them that she had spent the day with a friend and she knew that wasn’t exactly a lie; the angel who had saved her from being raped and beaten to a pulp WAS her friend, and she hoped to meet her today.

Shrugging into her brown leather jacket and zipping it up, Beth reached for the cash that was on her dresser and stuck it in her pocket. The money was for her trip on the bus, and for however long it took to find this woman…this angel from God.

‘Father, please lead me to her,’ She silently pleaded, lifting her tired blue eyes to ceiling one final time before leaving her bedroom and closing the door behind her.

*****

"Rose, have you seen Monica?" Andrew desperately called as he raced into the kitchen and spotting his former supervisor fixing breakfast, while Tess and Carla sat at the table talking,

"She’s not in her room! I don’t’ get where she is; I was with her during most of the night when we both couldn’t sleep, but I eventually went back to my own room and now…now she’s not there!"

"Not in her room?" Carla repeated, frowning as she rose from her seat,

"What do you mean, Andrew??"

"What I just said!" Andrew looked from each angel to the next, his green eyes horror-struck,

"And she’s not in any other part of the cabin-"

"Honey, she’s probably gone out to get some fresh air," Rose tried to reassure her young friend, whose eyes held so much anguish. Laying the spatula down on the countertop and walking over to him, the elderly angel laid a gentle hand on his shoulder and guided him over to the table where their other friends were sitting. Knowing full well what she was doing, Rose sat him down next to Tess and went back to fixing the eggs,

"Remember how she reacted on the ship several months ago when you went out to get some fresh air? She nearly had a fit worrying about you-"

"But Rose, Monica’s not in any condition to just leave without leaving a note! It doesn’t seem like her…and I know that she wouldn’t go against the Father’s orders and just go back to work!" Andrew raised his voice in exasperation, wanting to get up and pace. Running his fingers through his tangled blonde hair, the angel let out a deep sigh,

"Or maybe I’m losing it…"

"You’re not losing it, Andrew," Tess replied, gazing over at him and hoping that he would look at her. Much to her relief, he did, but his words to her weren’t the ones she was hoping for.

"And how do you know that, Tess?" He retorted, tilting his head,

"You’ve been gone for over 6 months, so how would you know if I’ve lost it or not?"

"Because I know my Angel Babies," She whispered, sucking in a deep breath and hoping that Andrew wouldn’t snap back and tell her not to call him that. It was worth a shot and she was taking it; what else could she lose?

"And I know Monica. She came down earlier before either of you were up, and told me that she had decided to go for a morning walk and clear her head for a bit. She’ll be back in a few hours."

Much to the older angel’s relief, Andrew didn’t snap back, instead she thought she saw a small hint of a smile cross his face as she mentioned the affectionate nickname. Although hesitant, Tess then reached over and laid a hand over Andrew’s and soon held it in her own.

"Baby…Don’t worry, she’ll be back soon," She looked deep into his green eyes and saw him breathe a sigh of relief at her words,

"We need to have faith in that little angel, Angel Boy…" She waited until he looked up before she asked quietly,

"Do you mind if I call you that, Andrew?"

Meeting his supervisor’s eyes with his own, Andrew’s green eyes suddenly filled with tears as he heard her call him the affectionate nickname that he hadn’t heard from her lips in so long. His heart racing frantically, but knowing that she was taking some small steps to try and get him to forgive her, Andrew forced a smile on his face for her sake and for the first time, gave her hand a small squeeze in return,

"I don’t mind, Tess…As a matter of fact, I’ve missed it coming from you."

"So have I, Andrew," She replied, smiling back, while her own heart raced,

"So have I."

*****

Several hours later…

Beth stepped off of the bus some hours later at Denver, Colorado and headed out of the bus terminal and over to the sidewalk. Looking both ways before crossing the street, the teenager rushed over to the other side of the street and leaned up against a brick wall. She was incredibly sleepy and ever since she had gone off in search of her angel, she hadn’t gotten much sleep and it was impossible to catch a few winks on a moving bus that jerked you awake every couple of seconds.

"God, now where do You want me to go?" She whispered to herself, staring up at the blue sky,

"Where is she? I have a feeling You’re telling me I’m in the right state, but am I in the right city? Will You tell me?"

As she waited for a reply, Beth closed her eyes and opened her heart to her Creator as she waited for the answer. After several moments, it finally drifted down to her heart and a broad smile crossed her face as she opened her blue eyes, which were now shining with happiness.

"Then the Rocky Mountains is where I’ll go. Thank you, God…"

And without any further thoughts, Beth headed East and followed the crowd, knowing deep down inside that eventually she would soon find the woman that had saved her from Philip all those months ago, and finally have a chance to thank her.

*****

Another hour passed and Monica still hadn’t arrived back to the cabin yet, and although Andrew knew that Tess had to be telling the truth about where she had gone-just for a walk-that still didn’t stop the worries from coming at him at full speed. When she didn’t leave him a note that morning of where she had gone, and considering everything that had been going on, Andrew was scared out of his mind; he didn’t want anything else to happen to Monica and when he had found out that she had told Tess of where she was going, and not him, that only made him frustrated.

Just as he finished his breakfast and put his dishes in the sink, Andrew washed his hands just as a knock on the front door sounded. Glancing over his shoulder and seeing that Carla and Tess had left the kitchen, while Rose was still cleaning up, Andrew sighed and headed over to the living room to answer the door. Grasping the knob and pulling it open, Andrew’s eyes widened in total surprise and confusion as he came face to face with Beth.

Chapter 4

"Beth?" Andrew’s confusion showed on his face as he moved aside to allow the teenager to enter.

Beth managed a nervous smile as she walked inside. She had recognized this man immediately, remembering that he had been one of the people who had shown up in the cargo hold to rescue them the night Philip had been arrested. But she was now more than a little puzzled by what he was doing here and where was her angel?

"What can I do for you, Beth?" He asked, closing the door behind her.

She managed a nervous laugh,

"I’m starting to wonder if I’ve made a mistake, but then you’re here and it would seem odd that God would lead me somewhere wrong where I know someone," She hesitated, deciding to trust in her Creator as she had all along,

"I’m looking for an angel."

Andrew’s eyes widened at her words as he swallowed hard,

"An…angel?"

The teenager nodded her head as she continued,

"I had an angel on board the ship…a beautiful angel, with long auburn hair and brown eyes…"

"Beth?" Carla’s eyes widened as she came into the living room, closely followed by Rose and Tess.

"Carla, right?" Beth smiled as the blond angel nodded her head numbly, before she looked back to Andrew,

"Carla told me I would see my angel again, but I didn’t want to wait any longer, so I asked God to take me to her. I really need to thank her and never got the chance."

"Thank her?" Andrew uttered, as he exchanged a glance with Carla, whose face held an indescribable expression,

"You know Monica?" His confusion was apparent. Yes, he knew Monica had been held captive along with Carla while Philip also had Beth, but he had no idea that Monica had been able to reveal herself to this girl.

"Is that her name? She has the accent, right?" Seeing him nod his head once more, she continued again,

"Is she here?"

No, baby, she isn’t," Tess spoke up, her own eyes confused by the arrival of this girl.

"Beth, I’m a little confused. I’m a friend of Monica’s, we all are," Andrew began hesitantly,

"She never mentioned helping you…"

"She did more than just help me," Beth stated softly, tears filling her eyes,

"She saved my life…"

Carla reached for Rose’s hand, trying to remain as calm as she could. She had a feeling that the truth was about to be told, and though a part of her was so relieved, another part of her was terrified for Andrew and for Monica. Feeling Rose give her hand a reassuring squeeze, Carla turned her attention back to Beth and Andrew.

"How did she do that, Beth?" He asked softly, though his heart was pounding in his chest. He had a feeling this was the missing piece to the puzzle, and he wasn’t about to let her go without knowing what had happened.

"Philip really tried to hurt me that night…he tried to kill me by beating me up, but that was after he tried to r*ape me," Tears slipped from her eyes as she remembered that night,

"But he was unable to do either, because the angel…Monica…saved me. She took the beatings and the r*ape for me, so I didn’t have to suffer…"

Andrew felt as if the room was spinning as he heard this girl’s words. He felt as if he had just been punched in the stomach by this revelation, but before he could even react, he felt a presence he would know anywhere and he slowly turned his head.

Having apparently come in from the upstairs back deck, Monica stood at the top of the steps. As their eyes met, he could see it all so clearly now. Her dark eyes were filled with shame and horror, and her face had paled. A second later, her hand flew to her mouth and she had turned around and fled down the hall.

A silence filled the living room, before Rose broke it and approached Beth with a gentle smile,

"Beth, how about I find you a ride home and when Monica comes back, I’m sure she’ll pay you a visit."

"Did I do something wrong?" Beth whispered, seeing the expression on the man’s face, which was one of complete pain.

"No, honey, you didn’t. This is just not a good time and we’re not sure when Monica will be able to speak with you," Wrapping her arm around the girl’s shoulders and led her to the door. Opening the door, Rose was not surprised at all to see Sam standing there.

"I can take her home, Rose," He said softly, smiling at Beth as he ushered her outside,

"You have much bigger problems to tend to, I think."

Once the front door had closed and Beth and Sam had departed, silence filled the room once more. Andrew ran his hand over his face, trying to ward off the anger he was feeling, anger greater than he had ever felt before over what he had just heard. Turning around to face the three angels, he looked at Carla, his eyes flashing with fury,

"You knew and you didn’t tell me?"

"She didn’t want you to know, Andrew," Carla cried out, her green eyes showing her distress,

"She knew you would somehow blame yourself and--."

"And even if I did, you still could have told me! Instead you left her to deal with this alone!" He snapped, his eyes turning to Rose,

"You knew as well, didn’t you?"

"Yes, honey, I did," Rose said softly, her eyes steadily meeting his.

"I can’t believe this!" He yelled, his anger beginning to peak,

"I thought the two of you were our friends, but when it matters most, you do nothing?!"

"Andrew, it wasn’t up to us.." Carla whimpered softly, tears shimmering in her eyes.

"Not up to you? She’s your friend, Carla! She insisted on going after you that night, but then when you knew what happened to her, you just shut up and turned your back, is that it? How long would you have waited, Carla before you did something, huh? How much worse would it have to get?" His eyes were blazing as he glared at her.

"I’m sorry!" She cried out, tears now streaking her cheeks,

"I made a promise, Andrew…I knew it was wrong, but what else was I to do!?"

"You could have told me so I could have helped her!" He snapped back, before turning to Tess, who had remained quiet through all of this. Ignoring the pain in her eyes, even though he knew Beth's words had come as a surprise to her as well; he met his eyes with hers,

"And you…you had this assignment screwed up from the beginning! Had we known that Beth had been the assignment, Monica could have made sure Beth was never down there that night and then none of this even would have happened! For that matter, even if you hadn’t of screwed it up, you rode her so hard through the whole trip, she felt like she needed to do something to prove herself to you, Tess!" Andrew took in a deep breath, forcing himself to try to calm down to no avail. Deep in his heart, he knew the one he was most angry with was Philip, but at the same time, he was none too happy with the three of them,

"You come in here all full of apologies for her and I, but you know what? I don’t want to hear them, not now and not ever!"

"Andrew!" Rose admonished him, trying to calm him down before he burned every bridge he had.

"Save it, Rose, okay?" He replied hotly, tears of anger threatening his eyes,

"This is all unforgivable! You’ve played dumb with me for months now; for six months you knew how worried I’ve been about my best friend and you could have righted it anytime, but you didn’t!"

"Baby, please calm down," Tess pleaded softly.

"Shut up, Tess," He snapped, grabbing his jacket from the coat rack,

"I want the three of you to stay away from me and from Monica, you got that? You’ve all done enough to hurt her, and I don’t have the desire to hear anything you have to say from this point on!"

As he slammed out the front door, he felt tears falling from his eyes as he thought about the things Beth had said and his heart broke for his gentle friend and what she had gone through and was still going through by not confronting it. He knew he needed to see her, to make her talk to him, but he needed to calm down first as what she didn’t need from him was anger.

Feeling another surge of anger, he turned his tear-filled eyes to the sky as he cried out,

"How could You have allowed this, Father?! How?!"

Chapter 5

Late that night, Andrew walked into Monica’s bedroom silently and sat down on her bed. The backpack that was slung over his shoulder he let drop to the carpet as he stared through tear-stained eyes at his best friend. Reaching a somewhat shaky hand out to touch her auburn hair, Andrew’s eyes filled with fresh tears as he stroked it.

"Oh Angel Girl, why didn’t you tell me?" He choked out in a whisper as he continued to stroke it, but before he could say anymore, he felt her hand grasp his and his eyes widened as he saw her wide awake,

"Monica…"

"Andrew, this was the reason why I didn’t want to tell you," She replied to his question as she continued to hold tightly to his hand, but her voice remained emotionless and her brown eyes remained dry. Andrew waited in silence as she continued,

"Okay, maybe I should’ve said something-"

"Yes, baby, you should have," Andrew interrupted her, but Monica cut him off.

"But I had my reasons, Andrew," She whispered tiredly as her head laid against the pillows and her eyes met his green ones,

"And I do have a question…now that you know, my friend…"

"What is that?" Andrew frowned worriedly as he squeezed her hand tightly.

Watching as she sucked in a deep breath and appeared to be thinking through her words before she said them, Andrew’s heart raced as he waited for her to speak. Finally when she did, however, it was like a punch in the stomach at her words.

"Why did you leave me that night? Why did you allow me to do that?" She whispered, and Andrew watched as his best friend’s eyes still remained dry, much to his confusion.

"Monica-I…" He stuttered, but Monica interrupted him gently as she continued to hold his gaze.

"Why, Andrew?"

"Monica…you practically BEGGED me to let you go!" Andrew choked out, the tears in his shiny green eyes now spilling down his cheeks, while his face paled,

"I-I didn’t know what else to do…Carla did need your help…"

Seeing his friend slightly nod her head and then release his hand from her gentle grasp, Andrew’s heart pounded loudly in his chest as he watched her brown eyes finally rest upon the backpack by his feet.

"What’s that for?"

Feeling himself start to get shaky at that question, but knowing that he had come into her bedroom that night to say goodbye for the time being, Andrew raised his hand and brushed her cheek with his fingertips,

"Angel Girl…I don’t know how to say this, so I’ll just say it. I came up here tonight to tell you goodbye for now. I-I need time to myself and I just can’t…I can’t face Rose and Tess…" At the mention of the two older angels, Andrew felt burning rage churn inside of him once again, but he forced himself to remain calm for his best friend’s sake,

"I will be back, sweetie, but I don’t know when…I just need some time to think-"

"You’re leaving me?" She squeaked, finally sitting up on the bed and staring into his eyes,

"Andrew, don’t…"

"Honey, I’m not going to be gone forever-" He started, but he was interrupted as Monica yelled into his face.

"You promised me you wouldn’t leave me, Andrew!" She snapped, her eyes never meeting his,

"You promised a long time ago! And now here you go running away again-"

"Monica, that’s not what I’m doing," Andrew objected, trying to take her hand, but cringed as he felt her yank it away,

"Angel Girl…I’ll be back-"

"Will you?" She retorted, backing up against the bed and staring at him coldly,

"You made promises to me before, but you still haven’t kept them!"

"Monica!" Andrew rose to his feet as tears slipped onto his pale cheeks once again. He wasn’t sure what else to say, but his heart broke at her next words.

"You know, maybe you should take your ‘time off’, Andrew. Just go! I highly doubt that the Father gave you permission to do so, but right now, I don’t care!" She shouted and Andrew turned to the bedroom door to make sure that her voice hadn’t woken up Tess, Rose or Carla. To his relief, it didn’t. Turning back to his angry friend, he stiffed as she continued with her harsh words,

"Go ahead and leave me…You left me 6 months ago, so I don’t care if you do it now-"

"Monica, what’s gotten INTO you??" Andrew choked out as he backed away from the bed,

"I don’t get this…First you shut me out and not tell me what happened on the ship; but now you’re angry at me when you have made it very clear these last few months that you don’t want my help at ALL! What’s the deal?!"

"Does that matter, Andrew?," Monica seethed,

"Now just go away…Just go…" Turning her gaze away from him, which still held no emotion other than anger at him, Monica laid her head back against her pillows and closed her eyes tightly.

Unable to believe what she had just said to him right then, Andrew lifted a shaky hand and wiped at the tears on his face before leaning down and grabbing hold of the backpack on the floor. Swinging it over his shoulder, the blonde Search and Rescue angel stared once more down at Monica as he whispered,

"If you say so, Angel Girl…"

And without any further words spoken between the two angels, Andrew tearfully turned away and exited the room, closing the door softly behind him.

*****

That morning, Andrew arrived at the bus station, feeling exhausted and worn out. Monica’s words kept echoing in his mind and her order for him to "just go", and his heart had shattered upon hearing those. He had told his best friend that he would surely be back; he had tried to reassure her of that, but the little Irish angel appeared to not even care.

Which caused Andrew to think that maybe he shouldn’t come back…If Monica didn’t want him around, after he had decided to let her use herself as bait to help Carla all those months ago, who would care that he never came back? And Tess, Carla and Rose probably wouldn’t give much of a rip either. The three angels had betrayed him in the worst possible way, which left him not only hurting, but furious at them.

"Why hello, sugar! Long time no see…"

Andrew jumped at the sound of the all-too familiar voice and he closed his green eyes for a moment, taking deep breaths as he forced his heart to not pound out of his chest. Finally opening his eyes, all the while feeling stiff, he found Denise sitting in a large car in front of him. The demon’s black hair hung down to her shoulders and she was behind the wheel of a red car that was so similar to Tess’ that it was almost freaky.

"Before you ask, Denise, the answer is NO," He snapped, turning his eyes, which were still filled with tears, away from her dark gaze.

"Who said I was gonna ask you to come with me, sweetheart?" Denise winked at him and leaned back in her seat, staring at him,

"You look like you need to…I don’t know…TALK to someone, Andrew. Am I right?"

"No, you’re not," He raised his voice, trying to keep it from shaking,

"Denise, we’ve been through this before-"

"Yes, we have and right now, I believe that you DO need to talk, Angel Boy." She smirked as she saw hurt flash in his green eyes and fury shone on his handsome face,

"So why don’t we go for a ride, Andrew? We have a LOT to talk about and deep down, I know you know it. After all, who wants to wait for a stupid bus when you can get a ride for free?"

Several long moments passed between the dark angel and the Search and Rescue angel, before Andrew finally gave up and grabbed his backpack. Shooting a glare at Denise, the human angel tossed the bag into the backseat and climbed into the passenger’s side with the demon all the while saying angrily,

"Fine, then…

Chapter 6

As Andrew starred straight ahead, trying not to think about what it was he was doing, he was nearly thrown from the car when Denise slammed on the brakes as she cursed under her breath. Looking up, Andrew felt a lump rising to his throat as he saw Sam standing in the middle of the road, his arms crossed in front of him.

Wordlessly and knowing he had no choice in this now, Andrew grabbed his backpack and climbed out of the car as Sam nodded to Denise and said in an even tone,

"I think it’s time you returned to your master, Denise and you will not bother this angel again." As Denise sped off in a rage, Sam turned his attention to Andrew and laid his hand on his shoulder,

"You and I have talking to do, son."

In the blink of an eye, Andrew found himself and Sam standing in the middle of God’s Country; that place between earth and heaven where angels and sometimes humans were sent to think or to sort out their emotions. He sighed softly, though he couldn’t deny that a part of him was relieved that Sam had shown up when he did.

"You know, Andrew," Sam began, his dark eyes steadily meeting those of the younger angel before him,

"If I thought for one second that you really wanted to leave with Denise, I would not have interfered. Please tell me I didn’t make a misjudgment in error."

Andrew looked away for a moment as he shook his blond head,

"You didn’t make a mistake, Sam…I’m not sure of what I was thinking. I can’t remember anything being quite as messed up as things are right now, is all."

Sam nodded his head in understanding, clearly seeing the troubled look in the angel’s green eyes,

"I know you have a lot of anger at Tess and at Rose right now, some anger with Carla as well…"

"They did [I]nothing[/I], Sam! Tess completely made a mess of that assignment six months ago; not only with her not getting it right to begin with, but as well as with her actions on board that ship! Rose and Carla knew what had happened and never told me, so no one was able to help Monica!"

Reaching over, Sam laid a hand on Andrew’s shoulder once more,

"And now that you know the truth, Andrew? Who is helping her now?"

Tears filled his eyes as they met with Sam’s but when he opened his mouth to speak, no words would come.

"I know that being around Tess, Rose and even Carla will be hard right now, but not impossible. You’re angry with them because you believe that they betrayed you and hurt Monica, and I’m not here to agree nor disagree with how you feel. However, in running, you are also betraying and hurting her, when she needs you the most." Sam spoke as gently as he could.

"She doesn’t need me, Sam," Andrew managed to say despite the tears that were now escaping his eyes,

"She didn’t even want to tell me what happened and tonight, she told me to go…"

"You know," Sam said thoughtfully,

"Sometimes I think the only real problem with this friendship that the Father gave to you both is that you two try so hard sometimes to protect each other; so hard sometimes that you miss the truth or you just can’t see it."

"What does she need to protect me from now, Sam?" He cried out, not understanding where this was going at all.

"From exactly what happened tonight, Andrew. Her struggling to make sense of what happened to her caused her to ask you why you allowed her to go help Carla that night to begin with. Her feelings of betrayal when you said you were leaving then caused her to lash out at you. Emotions are running high at that cabin, son, and hers are no exception, but the bottom line is that she doesn’t want you hurt." Laying his other hand against Andrew’s other shoulder, Sam looked directly into his eyes,

"The Father is counting on you to help one of His angels, Andrew and He knows you want that too. He also knows that in helping her, she in turn, can help you. Isn’t that the way it has always been between you two?"

Looking away, the handsome Search and Rescue angel nodded his head as his mind flashed with images of the last two times she had been there for him-when he had blamed himself about Brianna being in the clutches of one of the demons he had nearly gone with tonight and when he couldn’t forgive himself for striking her all those years ago. She had said the words he needed to hear to heal his hurting heart and now tonight, when her heart was grieving so heavily, he had left.

Hanging his head, he felt more tears coursing down his face,

"I’m sorry, Father," He whispered sorrowfully,

"and Monica…"

As he raised his head once more, he found himself standing outside of the cabin once again in the early hours of the morning and a very small, tearful smile played on his lips.

****

Once again, Andrew quietly opened the door to his best friend’s bedroom, his eyes coming to rest on her. Unaware of his presence, he could see her lifeless brown eyes gazing out the window as she rested her head on her pillow. As he heard her whisper, he could just make out the words that brought tears to his eyes.

"Why did you have to leave me now when I need you so much?"

Though her voice trembled, he could see that there were no tears, and he quietly made his way over to her bed, not wanting to startle her,

"Angel Girl."

A glimmer of surprise flickered in her eyes when she saw him sit down on the edge of her bed as she slowly sat up, though her expression was a little guarded,

"You came back." She whispered, meeting her eyes with his.

"Yeah," He whispered in return, reaching for her hand.

She gripped his hand back tightly, as she gazed downwards,

"I didn’t think you would…"

"Why would you think that?" He asked softly.

Drawing in a deep breath, she still didn’t meet his eyes,

"Because of what you must think of me now."

Andrew’s eyes widened at her words as he reached out and placed a finger under her chin to raise her head back up so he could see her grief-stricken face,

"Sweetheart, why on earth would I feel any differently towards you now that I know what happened? My feelings for you haven’t changed, Monica. Why would they?"

She struggled with her words, not having even spoken of this for six months,

"Because my feelings have changed about myself." She whispered, her eyes flashing pain.

Reaching for her other hand, he held them both tightly,

"Monica, I don’t really have any experience with this, so it would help me a lot if you could maybe tell me a little bit about how you’re feeling, so I can try to help," His eyes pleaded with her.

"I…" She looked uncertain for a moment, unsure of how to explain,

"When I was down there…in the cargo hold…and he showed up, he wanted to hurt me in that way…when he would touch my face, I could feel this incredible…fear and shame fill me. I was so scared, Andrew…I’ve never been more afraid. Then Beth showed up and…and I knew he was going to r*ape her and I thought about that fear that I had felt and here she was, just a child really and I didn’t want her to go through that. So, I asked God if there was a way to spare her, by my intervening and He granted my request…" Monica saw the tears fall onto her best friend’s cheeks as she felt him squeeze her hands even tighter as she struggled to continue,

"I…I thought I’d be all right…I mean, I was in angelic form, after all and I’ve taken pain for humans before…but I underestimated it this time, Andrew. The physical pain faded quickly, but the pain that was left in my heart was and is unimaginable. I can’t even comprehend this having happened, my mind just can’t wrap around it no matter how hard I try."

"Oh Monica," Andrew whispered sadly.

"I never told Carla…she knew because she was there and I can only assume that Carla told Rose," She explained softly, having heard the argument downstairs yesterday,

"I didn’t want to tell you because I was afraid you’d blame yourself and that I was just so ashamed…"

"But you have nothing to be ashamed of, baby. You saved Beth’s life that night and helped me to find you and Carla. Where is the shame in that, Monica?" He uttered softly.

Taking their entwined hands, she placed them over her heart,

"It’s in here, Andrew and it’s so strong and hurts so much," Her eyes glistened with tears for a moment before she blinked them back.

Andrew nodded his head in understanding, as he left go of her hand to cup her cheek,

"You know, it is okay to cry. You don’t have to fight that, especially around me."

A sad smile trembled on her lips as she whispered to him,

"I’m afraid, my friend, that if I start crying, I won’t stop and I just want to get past this."

"The only way past grief, Angel Girl, is through it. You have to confront this and I will help you. I promise," His loving eyes searched hers, hoping he was somehow beginning to reach her, especially now that he knew she wanted him to be able to do just that.

"How?" Monica asked softly,

"How can you or anyone else help me?"

Andrew was quiet for a moment, considering her question carefully. Tenderly, he reached over and pulled her into his arms, feeling her nestling her head underneath his chin. Kissing the top of her head gently, he whispered softly to her,

"By listening to you when you need to talk and by holding your hand when you feel afraid. By waking you up if you have nightmares and when the tears finally come, baby girl, I will be right where I am right now. And you know why?" He felt her wrap her arms around his waist as she shook her head,

"Because I love you, Angel Girl and we will get through all of this together, okay? You, me and the Father."

"I’m sorry about earlier…I don’t mean to get angry, but the last few months it just happens sometimes," She whispered, closing her eyes as the sound of his heartbeat comforted her aching spirit.

"It’s already forgotten," He replied softly, gently rubbing her back.

"Andrew?" Monica whispered, her voice, though weary, held the first glimmer of hope she hadn’t felt in a very long time.

"Hmmm?" He replied softly.

"I know things are not good right now with you, Tess and Rose and maybe even Carla, but I’m so glad you’re here."

He felt tears burning in his eyes and he held her tighter,

"Me too, Angel Girl, me too."

c

Chapter 8

Tess bolted down the hall, unable to help herself as she heard the frightened cries coming from Monica’s room. She knew in her heart that Andrew would undoubtedly be with her, but it was too hard for her to stay away when one of her Angel Babies was hurting, and she knew that right now, Monica was. She knew that because of that, Andrew was too, but other than that, she didn’t want to venture too much of what her Angel Boy was feeling. His anger at her hurt her terribly, but she knew it was justified; she just didn’t know how to remedy the situation.

Opening the door to Monica’s room, her eyes came to rest on Andrew, who was sitting on the edge of her bed, speaking in soft whispers to the angel who was still caught up in the dream,

"Is she all right?" Tess asked, her dark eyes showing her concern.

Andrew glanced back at her, his eyes sparking with anger that she would even come in here,

"What are you doing here, Tess?" He seethed, though he kept his voice down, not wanting to awaken his best friend, who was beginning to fall back into a more peaceful slumber.

"I heard her, Andrew and I was worried." She replied, trying to remain calm, despite his open hostility towards her.

"Too bad you weren’t worried about her six months ago," He retorted bitterly, turning his attention back to Monica, as his hand tenderly stroked her tangled hair.

Tess sighed softly, wishing that there were a way to reach him,

"Andrew, I was--."

"Well, you sure had a funny way of showing it, Tess!" He snapped softly, rising to his feet. Though his voice was quiet, it didn’t lose the anger he felt towards her,

"Look at her! Every time she sleeps, she trembles and has these dreams. Dreams about HIM, Tess! You know, the wrong assignment you gave to us! "

"Andrew, I know I messed that up…I KNOW that," Tess responded, trying to fight back the tears,

"Do you think I would have intentionally allowed any harm to come to her? I love that baby every bit as much as you do and it breaks my heart that she is suffering like this--."

"That’s a lie," He spat back at her, coming closer to face her,

"There are moments when I think you did more harm that Philip could have ever done, Tess! If all you had done was get the assignment wrong, it would have been one thing, but you did much more than that. You harassed her for days on end as soon as that assignment began. Every time I turned around you were hollering at her and let me tell you something, Tess. You weren’t on board Titanic when it went down, but Monica and I were! Some things you just don’t forget, like the holocaust, because you were THERE, and it doesn’t matter how many years ago it happened, some things just leave a lasting impression, you know?"

Feeling tears escaping her eyes, Tess tried to speak, but Andrew was obviously nowhere near finished.

"But not only did you belittle those fears, but you put me up to doing it to her as well! How dare you? Asking me to hurt her, when you had already done more than enough! She can’t even release her emotions over this whole thing, because you jumped down her throat any time she thought about crying! So, now you got what you wanted, right Tess? Monica not allowing herself to feel anything?" He glared at her, though he shot a glance over his shoulder to make sure his friend was still asleep. Seeing that she was, he continued,

"Then after all your badgering she takes it upon herself to save her friend, and then what do you do? You hit her! Then you blame me for her decision by telling me I’m stupid, when it was your fault all along! There was just no winning with you, was there, Tess?"

"Andrew, I’m sorry…and I’ve told her I was sorry and she accepted my apology, so why can’t you?" Tess’ eyes pleaded with him,

"I didn’t even do these things to you, other than putting you up to trying to straighten her out, and I told you that night it was wrong of me to do so and you forgave me then. What happened between then and now?"

"What happened was that your screw up put her in a position to get hurt, that’s what happened," He snapped back at her,

"Even if you hadn’t been wrong about the assignment, her going down there, I’m willing to bet had to do with proving something to you! Even the reason Carla was down in the cargo hold to begin with was your fault! Monica and I had an argument because of the things you wanted me to say to her…it was a complete domino effect, Tess, from the first moment you opened your mouth about that ship. Then to not even help us save them?" He looked at her, disgust apparent in his eyes,

"I’ve never been so disappointed in another angel in my entire existence. You turned your back on she and Carla both, because you felt guilty and rightly so! But you could have started to make it right, but you didn’t! You just walked away, Tess. I’ll never forgive you for that and I think the only reason Monica did was because she can’t handle anything else right now." He turned his head as he heard his best friend whimper softly in her sleep and he walked back over to the bed and sat down beside of her,

"Just get out of here, Tess. You’ve done more damage than I even know how to repair," Turning his back on her, he reached for his friend’s hand, despite the fact that his own was shaking.

Tears steaming down her face, Tess nodded her head, casting one more glance at the two angels who were nearest and dearest to her breaking heart, before she turned and left the room, closing the door softly behind her.

****

"Well, looks whose up?" Carla smiled as Monica came downstairs late that morning, though the younger angel could tell that her friend hadn’t had much sleep,

"How are you doing?"

Monica managed a faint smile as she sat down on the edge of the couch, pulling the flannel shirt Andrew had given her on their last visit to the cabin more tightly around her, though the fire kept the living room quite warm,

"I’m okay," she replied evasively before she looked around her, and turned tired and questioning eyes to Carla,

"Where is everyone?"

Carla sighed softly,

"Rose went for a walk, Andrew is out on the porch and Tess…is packing," She replied regretfully.

"Packing?" Monica’s eyes showed surprise and confusion upon hearing those words,

"To go where?"

"I’m not sure, Monica. She and Andrew aren’t getting along very well and she feels it best that she leaves," Carla said softly, watching as without a word, Monica got up and headed back upstairs.

"Tess?" Opening the door to her supervisor’s room, Monica’s eyes came to rest on the suitcase that was nearly filled and sitting on the bed,

"Tess, please, don’t go."

Tess smiled weakly as she watched Monica come in the room,

"Hello, baby," She said softly as her Angel Girl sat down on the edge of her bed, her dulled brown eyes focused on her own.

"Tess, I don’t understand…why are you leaving?"

"It’s for the best, baby girl," She explained sadly as she moved to close the suitcase and locked it,

"Andrew and I are having some problems right now and I’m not sure we’ll ever be able to work them out."

"You never will if you leave, Tess," Monica implored, her eyes pleading.

Tess sighed softly as she approached her young charge and took her hands,

"Listen to me, Angel Girl. Andrew is right, about a lot of things and he has a right to be angry with me. I know that. I hurt you, perhaps more than you even realize right now, and in turn, that hurt him. He loves you so much, Monica…"

"And he loves you too, Tess, even if he is angry. I know he does," She replied softly, her dark eyes looking up into Tess’,

"I don’t want you to go…"

"Now listen to me, Monica," Tess’ voice was stern, though her eyes shone with her love for the younger angel,

"You have issues you have got to resolve, baby. What you went through was a terrible thing and you have work to do with this. The last thing you need is Andrew and I going at each other’s throats every time our paths cross in this house, okay?" Her expression softened, seeing the sadness in Monica’s eyes,

"He is here to help you, Angel Girl. Let him, all right? We both know he can if you just stop pushing these feelings aside. They have to come to the surface and the longer you suppress them, the harder it will be when they refuse to stay at bay any longer," Gently, she laid a hand on Monica’s cheek, thinking about Andrew’s words early this morning,

"And baby, if anything I said or did six months ago, is keeping you from letting this out, I’m sorry. You’ve always been so good at letting us know how you feel about things, so don’t let anything I said take that away from you…especially now."

"When will I see you again?" Monica whispered, her already hurting heart, aching all the more.

"When you’re better," Tess replied gently, pulling Monica to her feet so she could wrap her arms around her,

"I’m so sorry this happened to you, baby. Let Andrew and the Father help you, all right? Promise me, Angel Girl."

"I’m trying to, Tess…I am." She uttered, hugging Tess tightly,

"Please take care of yourself, okay? And don’t give up on Andrew…he’ll come around."

Pulling away, Tess managed a smile,

"We’ll see, baby, we’ll see."

****

Andrew looked from where he sat on the porch swing when he saw Monica come out the front door an hour later,

"Hi sweetie," He said softly, moving over to make room for her. As she sat down, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders,

"How are you doing?"

Resting her hand on his thigh to soften what she was going to say, she replied softly,

"Tess just left."

He nodded his head, gazing out through the woods before them,

"I know."

She was quiet for a moment before speaking up once more,

"Andrew, I’m not angry with you, please know that, because I need you right now…"

"It’s okay, Monica," He interrupted in an even tone, hating to admit that he felt relief at the news that Tess was now gone,

"Say what you’re feeling."

"I…I guess I don’t really understand. Why can’t you forgive her?" She looked up into his eyes, her own filled with sadness.

Andrew sighed softly as he pulled her closer, not wanting her to even think that her question had upset him,

"Monica, it’s complicated, Angel Girl. I saw all those things she said and did to you on that assignment and I see you now and can see all the damage that has been done."

"Philip is the reason, Andrew, not Tess," She implored gently,

"It was Philip and my decision to do what I did for Beth."

"Maybe that is the root cause, sweetheart, but there are so many underlying factors; factors that Tess caused, Monica. Neither you nor Carla would even have been down there to begin with if it weren’t for her. You never would have had to make that decision if she had handled things the way she should have."

Monica sighed softly, her finger tracing an imaginary circle on the leg of his jeans,

"This is all such a mess and I can’t help but to feel responsible for it somehow."

No sooner were the words out, that Andrew turned to face her and laid his hands firmly on her shoulders,

"Well, you get that thought out of you head right now, Monica. None of this is your fault, okay?"

"But I don’t feel like it is all Tess’ fault…" She uttered weakly.

"Regardless, it isn’t yours," He stated firmly, knowing he couldn’t pin point all the things he had told Tess earlier, as the last thing he wanted to do was overwhelm his friend even more. Relief flowed through him as she nodded her head and he got up and pulled her to her feet,

"C’mon. We’re going for a walk. You haven’t set foot outside for three days now and the fresh air will do you good."

Still feeling tired, she thought about objecting, but then nodded her head once more as she took his proffered hand. As they walked down the steps, she couldn’t help but think of how even when things were so difficult, being with him, was always so easy, despite all that was going on around them.

Chapter 9

Andrew held onto Monica’s hand as they walked through the doors of the cabin some hours later and the angel’s eyes came to rest on the kitchen door, where he heard rustling around coming from behind it. Giving his best friend’s hand a tight squeeze and then releasing it, Andrew took in a deep breath as he got the feeling that it was Rose in the other room and he knew he had to talk to her sooner or later.

After all, how could things get any worse between them? He knew he also had to apologize to her for his hateful words to her the other day and although no matter how much he hated to admit it at the moment-and knowing that he never WOULD admit it-after several hours of talking to Monica, he was starting to feel a twinge of guilt, too, over the way he had treated Tess these last few days…especially that morning. And he did miss her and the close friendship they had once shared.

Shaking his head hard to rid himself of these thoughts, the blonde angel turned to his friend beside him,

"I’m going to go and talk to Rose, all right?"

Nodding her head sadly and reaching out to give his arm a squeeze, the Irish angel watched as her best friend and fellow angel walked through the swinging doors of the kitchen. Sighing softly to herself, Monica lowered her head and trudged up the steps to the second floor, heading back towards her bedroom.

*****

Trying to keep herself as busy as possible to take her mind off of everything that was happening around them all after having returned from her walk, Rose busied herself by cleaning up the kitchen. Anything that looked the slightest bit dirty, she washed, no matter how long it took. Now wiping a wash rag over the kitchen table, the elderly angel didn’t even notice that Andrew had walked in and was now standing behind her until she heard her former charge’s voice call her name.

"Rose?"

Forcing back a hot round of tears that threatened her blue eyes, Rose closed them for a brief moment and then set the wash rag back down onto the table. Finally turning around, the angel faced her friend, silently lifting up a prayer that his anger at her had dwindled at least somewhat and that he was now calm enough to talk to her…although it saddened her heart that he wasn’t able to speak with Tess. His anger at the other supervisor was so great and ever since Tess had left that afternoon, Rose hadn’t seen even the slightest bit of sadness from the younger angel, which broke her heart.

"Hi, honey," She whispered, undoing her apron around her waist and setting it down on the kitchen counter. Hoping that he wouldn’t bite her head off, she approached him,

"Are you all right?"

Not answering his former supervisor’s question straight forward, Andrew stayed where he was, but met Rose’s eyes with his green ones,

"Rose…I knew that I couldn’t go on forever avoiding you. That wouldn’t be possible."

Steadily keeping her eyes focused on her young friend, Rose nodded her head and waited patiently for him to continue.

"I-I want to apologize for the hateful words I spoke to you the other day, Rose," He finally spoke, and Rose didn’t miss the tears that threatened his green eyes. Her heart tugged with sympathy for him as she listened,

"You are my friend, Rose. You have been for a long time and I…I’m sorry for what I said to you."

"Andrew, honey," Rose spoke up with love in her voice, although the tears that threatened her own eyes were now starting to spill over. Stepping closer to him and silently breathing a sigh of relief that he didn’t back away from her, the angel stood in front of him and took hold of his hands in her own,

"I knew that you were angry and I understand that. And it takes a lot of strength to come to me and talk to me right now, honey. You don’t even have to ask for me to forgive you, because I forgave you as soon as you said those words. All right, Andrew?"

Seeing him nod his head slowly and turn away from her, Rose gave his hands another squeeze before leading him over to the table and ushering him towards a chair. Taking a seat beside of him, she took his hand once again and continued speaking to her friend.

"Andrew…I know that I may be treading on thin ice by saying what I’m going to say, but I’m willing to take that risk," The older angel spoke softly, her voice filled with seriousness over this entire situation,

"It’s about Tess." Before he could object, Rose gave his hand a tight squeeze and laid her other hand on top of his, silencing him,

"Honey, will you tell me what you’re feeling towards her at the moment? I know that you don’t hate her; you don’t have a hateful bone in your body-"

"I don’t hate her, Rose!" Andrew interrupted, lifting his head and Rose’s heart broke again as she saw tears finally running down his somewhat pale face…but at the same time, she felt a sense of relief that her friend was now feeling something other than anger.

"I know that, sweetheart," Rose reassured him, giving his hand one more squeeze,

"That’s what I’m saying. My question to you is, what are your true feelings towards her right now? After she left today, what did you feel?"

"Is this a trick question, Rose?" Andrew furrowed his brow and frowned at his friend,

"Because if it is-"

"No, it’s not, Andrew," Rose reassured him, rubbing his fingers with her hand as she continued holding it tightly,

"And you know that you can tell me anything, right? I won’t get angry at you for expressing your true feelings, Angel Boy."

Sucking in a deep breath as she awaited his reply to the nickname that Tess had given him ages ago, Rose finally let it out as she saw her former charge’s face turn white as a sheet and then his face suddenly crumpled and the tears spilled over.

"Did you have to call me that, Rose?" He choked out, wishing he could hold his emotions in, but not succeeding.

"You do miss her, don’t you, Andrew?" Rose gently pushed, trying to get it out of him and hoping that by the time this conversation was over, so would his anger be.

"Fine, I do. Happy now, Rose?" He suddenly snapped, trying to pull his hand away, but the older angel caught it up in her own again and refused to let it go,

"Rose, please just let me go all right??"

"Not now, baby, not now…" Rose shook her head stubbornly.

"Why are you so stubborn?!" Andrew demanded, the tears still falling from his green eyes.

"I got it from you now, didn’t I, Andrew?" Rose tilted her head to the side, and raised an eyebrow at him.

Shooting an annoyed glance over at his supervisor, Andrew forced himself to not snap back again and he drew in a shaky breath, once more trying to get his feelings and emotions under control again,

"Rose…"

"Honey, you can answer me." Rose scooted closer to him and wrapped a supportive arm around his slumped shoulders,

"Talk to me, Andrew, please?"

"I’m still so angry, Rose, but…"

"But?" Rose pushed, forcing him to meet her eyes.

"But…I miss her calling me ‘Angel Boy’, like you just did, Rose," He finally choked out, raising a hand and swiping at the angry and frustrated tears on his cheeks,

"I’ve missed her baby talking me like she’s always done in the past, and I admit, I even grew envious for a moment about how she and Monica’s relationship is all fine now, and ours is ruined. I miss her hugs, Rose…I do. I remember how when I was thinking that I should give up my wings because of a failed assignment and Tess was the first one that was there, with open arms. And…"

"And?" Rose gave him a squeeze as she felt him rest his head against her shoulder.

"And all of this anger aside…I just miss our friendship. I never would admit it, until after my walk with Monica a few hours ago. But now I do, Rose…I miss her so much…"

Feeling himself start to break down for the first time in so long it seemed, Andrew allowed his tears to come hard, but not from anger, and he soon found himself sobbing on Rose’s shoulder all the while whispering up forgiveness to both the Father and Tess…wherever she was.

*****

Late that night, Monica tossed and turned in her bed, her mind filling with a nightmare that had been in her mind every time she slept…or tried to sleep. Not exactly knowing how badly she was thrashing around, the Irish angel in complete human form relived the memories of what happened 6 months ago…risking her life and existence to save Carla from the hands of Philip; the beatings she endured and finally, the rape that she took for Beth.

In her nightmare, Monica looked over at her attacker and she felt herself growing cold and tense up. Instead of Philip that was attacking her, it was the face of Andrew that looked back at her. But much to her dismay and confusion, it wasn’t his voice she heard.

It didn’t sound like the gentle, loving voice of her dearest friend.

Instead, it was the threatening voice of the one who had took away her innocence…but the face of Andrew still wouldn’t go away and she grew more confused and frightened then ever.

"You’ll never get away, sweetheart!" The voice hissed as he struck her once again and Monica’s eyes filled with hot tears,

"You hear me? Never!!"

"No! Don’t do this, please don’t do this!" She heard herself sobbing madly. But as she was thrashing about, another voice in her mind that was more calming and gentle sounded and the young angel wasn’t sure which one to listen to or even believe anymore.

"Monica!" The other voice called, but Monica only continued to scream.

And sob.

Chapter 10

"Monica! Monica! Wake up, baby, please!" Andrew pleaded, reaching to take her by the shoulders to try to gently shake her awake, but the terrified angel struggled to get away from him, her eyes wild with fear.

"Don’t hurt me…please…don’t hurt me…" She begged tearfully, now cowering up against the headboard.

Tears stinging in his eyes for her pain, he lowered his voice, making it as soothing as he could,

"Sweetheart, I’d never hurt you. You’re dreaming, Angel Girl, nothing more, okay?" Noticing she was beginning to calm down, he inched closer to her and reached for her hand,

"It’s just a dream, Monica. Philip can’t hurt you now, so come back to me, baby girl…he won’t ever hurt you again, I promise…" He watched through blurred vision as some of the confusion left her dark eyes and he reached to touch her cheek,

"You’re safe, sweetie…you’re safe…"

As the nightmare slowly faded, her eyes came to rest on her best friend,

"Andrew?" She whispered, her entire body shaking violently.

"I’m right here, little one," He whispered, his heart aching for her. As he watched for her reaction, she dissolved into violent sobs that shook her frame as well as him to the very core of his being. Quickly, he moved to gather her into his arms, cradling her tenderly as her tears, after six months, finally came,

"That’s it, baby girl, just cry…just cry," He whispered to her, his own tears now streaking his cheeks as he rocked her gently, his hand running through her hair.

Andrew had no idea how long they remained that way or how long it was before her violent sobs turned to a quieter weeping, but he never released her or tried to stop her tears. He could feel how drained she was and how she still trembled slightly in his arms, but he just held her in silence until she was ready to speak.

Still clinging tightly to him, Monica drew in a shaky breath and left it out slowly,

"This hurts so much more than it did earlier," She whispered, her voice catching in a sob.

"I told you that the only way past this was through it, honey, and through it will hurt," He replied softly, his hand moving to rub her back.

"You didn’t tell me that last part," She tried to joke, before she broke down once again for a moment,

"Why did this have to happen, Andrew? Why? I hate the way I feel inside…"

"It happened because you cared so much about Beth, that you were willing to offer yourself to take that pain from her, sweetheart," Andrew kissed the top of her head before he pulled away a little to look into her tired and swollen eyes,

"And you have no reason to hate how you feel inside."

"But I’m not the same…" She whimpered miserably,

"There are times when I wonder how you can even look at me, Andrew…"

"Oh Monica, listen to me, baby," He took her face into his hands, his fingers brushing at the tears that continued to fall,

"Do you know what I see when I look at you? The same sweet, trusting soul that I’ve always seen, Angel Girl. I see the same innocent little angel who is my dearest friend and who cares more about her friends than she does herself. In fact, the only difference is that I’m missing that sweet smile I love so much, but we are going to find that smile again, baby girl. I’m not stopping till we do." Looking deeply into her tear-filled eyes, he continued softly,

"Philip can only take from you what you allow him to take, Monica, so don’t give him more than he deserves, and he deserves nothing from you." He knew in his heart, she needed to forgive this human who had hurt her, but he wasn’t about to broach that subject just yet. Folding her back into his arms, he continued to rock her still trembling form.

Resting her cheek against his chest, she closed her eyes for a moment,

"I’m so tired, Andrew…I’m tired right down to my soul."

"I know," He responded gently, realizing that the last hour had exhausted him as well,

"Why don’t you try to get some sleep, sweetheart?"

""I don’t want to be alone," Monica replied, her voice trembling.

Andrew thought for a moment, thinking that after the terrible nightmare, a change of scene might be good for her,

"You know, that spare bed is still in my room," Feeling her nod her head, he pulled away and stood up, helping her to her feet, tears stinging his eyes once more as she immediately wrapped her arms around his waist. His arm securely around her shoulders, he led her down the hall to his room.

Pulling back the comforter and sheet on the bed, he waited as she climbed in and laid down, then he pulled the comforter securely around her before sitting down on the edge of the bed,

"Better?" He asked softly.

"Yeah," She whispered, feeling a little more secure now,

"I’m sorry to be so clingy…" she added sheepishly.

Andrew smiled as he brushed her hair away from her face,

"You know that is something I don’t mind, sweetie. I’ll always be here for you, you know that. Now, try to sleep, okay? There is nothing here that will hurt you."

Reaching for his hand, she linked her fingers through his as she gazed up at him,

"Andrew?"

"Yes, Angel Girl?"

"Do you think that you and Tess will ever be okay?" She asked carefully, squeezing his hand tightly.

He struggled for an answer, seeing that this was weighing heavily on her heart as well as on his own, and he shook his head in awe once again, over the power of this friendship. There were times he thought for sure this little angel could read his mind,

"I hope so, baby girl," He responded honestly, seeing a spark of hope in her eyes at his words, and feeling a bit of hope himself,

"I hope that in time, we’ll all be okay again."

"I’m worried about you…and Tess. Even if you deny it, I can tell that you’re hurting by all of this and I wish I knew how to make it better for you." She replied, some of the dullness now gone from her brown eyes and replaced by her love for him.

"Do you make it better, sweet girl, you do," Andrew responded with a gentle smile, as a tear fell from his eye.

Monica nodded her head as she began to lose her struggle to sleep,

"Thank you…for taking such good care of me…" She whispered, her eyes closing in exhaustion.

"It’s always my pleasure," Andrew replied, watching as she drifted off to sleep as he said a prayer that she would finally get the rest she needed. He continued to hold her hand for a few more minutes, before he carefully pulled his hand away, giving her hand a gentle kiss before he stood up. Leaning down once more, he readjusted the covers around his friend, and then leaned down to kiss the top of her head before lightly touching his forehead to hers,

"I love you, little soul mate," He whispered with a soft smile, remembering her words to him the last time they had been here and he knew she was right. Their bond was deeper than that of friendship; it was a bond of their souls for which he was eternally grateful, even in painful moments such as the last hour had been. But he had a good feeling now that she had started on the path to recovery.

****

"Is she still asleep?" Carla asked early the following afternoon as Andrew came back downstairs from checking on his friend.

"Yeah," He smiled as he took a seat beside of her on the couch,

"She’s just wiped out, I think and the rest will do her good."

The younger angel nodded her head as she watched him intently,

"You seem to be doing a bit better yourself, Andrew," She remarked carefully, noticing that there was no trace of anger about him now.

He nodded his head, even though a trace of sadness was evident in his green eyes,

"Yes and no. I did a lot of thinking yesterday after Monica and I talked out on our walk and I know now that regardless of how wrong Tess had been on that last assignment, I never really gave her the chance to explain anything. I just still can’t understand her attitude towards Monica on that trip and I want to, you know?"

Carla was quiet for a moment before she spoke up carefully,

"I’ve been thinking a lot about that too, Andrew, especially beings the whole thing was so out of character for Tess. I know she has the short end of the patience stick sometimes, but it just wasn’t like her to react the way she did over and over again."

Andrew eyes her curiously, wondering what she was getting at as he waited for her to continue.

"I guess the thought has crossed my mind, that maybe Tess knew something terrible was going to happen to Monica and she felt powerless to stop it," She shook her head, seeing his confusion and trying to explain herself better,

"Andrew, what if things happened with Philip exactly the way they were supposed to? Just hear me out on this one, okay?" Seeing him nod his head, she continued,

"The Father doesn’t make mistakes and I was actually at the time a little surprised by the fact that He allowed Monica to do what she did, knowing how it would affect her in the days and weeks to come. But once the healing happens, which it has started to, just think about it…no other angel would be able to truly relate to a human who has been through rape. You know how hard it was to reach her, not being able to fully comprehend her feelings on this. But now, she knows and can use that knowledge to help others."

Andrew was quiet for several moments, taking in all she had said as he drew in a deep breath,

"So, you’re saying Tess may have known what would take place? But Carla, she got the assignment wrong…"

"I’m wondering if maybe it was a change of plans, Andrew. Beth did wind up being the assignment, after all, no matter how you look at it. And were it not for Philip’s part in all of this.." she shuddered slightly, thinking about the human,

"then Monica would not have known the fear that girl had to be feeling. But she and I experienced that fear, she to a greater degree," She shrugged her shoulders,

"I’m not even sure I’m making sense."

"But if that were true, why wouldn’t Tess have said something? Why would she have just walked away when we were going to save the two of you?" He shook his head tearfully, trying to rationalize this in his mind.

"Maybe she didn’t say anything because she didn’t want to instill the fear in you both and after the fact, it just wasn’t the right time, Andrew. You were so angry and Monica was hurting, and as far as her walking away, I think maybe she knew what had transpired and her grief was too great, both with what had happened to Monica as well as with how angry you were with her," Sighing she reached for his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze,

"I may be wrong about all of this. I only know how deeply she loves you both and when either of you are hurting, she is too."

"But she said in the kitchen the first night we were here that she was in the dark about what was bothering Monica. She wouldn’t lie to me, Carla, at least, I don’t think so." He continued, hating to admit that this all made so much sense it was frightening.

"No, I don’t think she would either, but maybe she didn’t really understand what she was feeling and if Tess had told you that she knew what had happened, think of how hurt you would have been, being the only one to not know. I don’t think she lied to you, I think she just left out part of the truth to spare your feelings as she knew the truth had to come from your best friend, and not from her."

Andrew sighed deeply,

"You know, sometimes it’s a wonder I have any friends at all." He remarked sadly, shaking his head,

"I’ve been so selfish through this whole thing, only centering on how I feel. I never gave Tess a chance to explain anything, I jumped all over you and Rose, after I found out what happened to Monica, I left," He rested his head in his hands,

"I’ve been so quick to judge Tess that I haven’t even taken a good hard look at the way I’ve been acting."

"None of us are perfect, Andrew," Carla said softly.

"I know that, Carla, I do, but I’ve been so quick to leap to anger or running away when I don’t want to confront things, especially this time. It’s like my friendship with Monica has clouded my ability to see that maybe Tess was only acting as a friend as well, as were you and Rose, by keeping your promises."

"Andrew, it’s okay, really," Carla replied, her brow furrowing in confusion,

"That is forgotten. Rose and I, we both understood why you were so angry."

"No, Carla, you’re missing the point," He sighed once again, unable to meet her eyes,

"Tess has always taken a back seat to my friendship with Monica, and if what you are saying is true, then it is all the more clear this time. I wouldn’t even give her a chance to explain any of this and she has been my friend since the beginning of time. She’s never once turned her back on me when I needed her."

"What are you saying, Andrew?" She asked softly, finding herself suddenly beginning to worry and not really knowing why.

"I’m saying….I’m saying that maybe once Monica is better, it’s time we cooled it for awhile. Tess has never once complained about my friendship with Monica, but there has to be times when it has to hurt her and for me to not even care this time about why she did what she did…its just unacceptable to me, Carla." He felt the tears burning in his eyes over his own words, thinking about the hurt they would cause his best friend, but yet he couldn’t shake the hurt he had caused Tess either.

"Andrew, you can’t mean that!" Carla gasped, unable to believe what she was hearing,

"You and Monica share a special bond, a gift from the Father! You can’t just turn it off and on and Tess knows that!"

"But she’s been hurt by this gift, Carla," He argued, though his voice held no anger,

"Do you think I like this? But to hurt Tess like this when she has always been there for us isn’t fair. I love her, Carla, I’m just not sure she knows that."

"You don’t want to do this, Andrew," She whispered, blinking back tears as this whole mess took another drastic turn,

"You will break that angel’s heart and yours as well."

Getting up from the couch, Andrew headed for the front door, knowing he needed time alone to think. Opening the door, he turned back to his friend and replied softly,

"Well, then maybe we’ll both know how Tess feels."

Chapter 11

"Tess, we need to talk."

Tess turned around from where she stood at the edge of the cliff that she had stood at over 6 months ago and she gulped as she came face to face with Sam. Expecting a lecture from him, but not having it in her at the moment to snap back at him like she usually would have, the older angel lowered her eyes and whispered,

"Sam…I know what I’m doing is wrong-"

"You got that one right there, Tess," Sam interrupted, motioning his friend over to a nearby rock and ordering her to sit down,

"You’re running away again, from the friends you love and you know that’s wrong."

"But how can I go back to him, Sam?" Tess choked out as tears sprang to her pained, brown eyes,

"How can I face my Angel Boy ever again? He hates me now, and I know that I hurt Monica by leaving like that, but it’s the only way. I will return when she’s better, though, Sam, you must believe that-"

"Oh no, Tess, you’re not returning ‘when she’s better," Sam interrupted sternly and continued as he saw Tess’ confused look,

"You’re going back NOW. Understood?"

"But I can’t, Sam-" The supervisor argued tearfully, but was once again interrupted by the Angel’s Angel, who she knew that never took "no" for an answer. The two angels knew one another like the back of their halos and although Tess knew that Sam loved her, that didn’t stop him from setting her straight when she needed it…But how could she go back??

"Who said you couldn’t? The enemy, Tess? You know that he’s whispering in your ear to leave now and I know that you don’t WANT to; you want to be there and work things out with Andrew and be there for Monica until she heals, but you won’t because you’re stubborn, Tess," Sam looked deep into her dark eyes which were filled with tears and continued,

"And Andrew does NOT hate you. I don’t know how you could ever think that about him. Yes, he’s been angry at you and at Carla and Rose, but…The Father wants you to go back; He has told me that you would be surprised about how Andrew’s feeling right now and God wants you to be there right now. All you have to do is accept what I’m saying, put aside this fear and self-blame of yours and go."

"But Sam-"

"I don’t want to hear any more excuses, Tess," Sam frowned at her and stood up from the rock, looking down at her pale face,

"Now, I’m going to give you some time to think about this and by the time you’re done, I hope you will have made the right decision-the decision that the Father God wants you to make, not by how you’re feeling."

And without any further words, the older angel disappeared, leaving his former charge alone on the cliff, silent tears streaming down her face.

*****

The next morning, Monica walked down the steps of the staircase, wearing Andrew’s flannel shirt that he had given to her and feeling nice and warm in it. Although still tired, the Irish angel was feeling more alert and better for the first time in 6 long months. And that was such a relief to her and she couldn’t wait to talk to her best friend about it.

Smiling brightly as she came into the living room and seeing Andrew on a stool in front of the fireplace, Monica walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders from behind. Leaning her face up against his cheek and savoring the warmth of his body and the fire in front of them, the angel whispered,

"Good morning."

"Good morning, sweetheart," Andrew gave her hands a tight squeeze as he smiled sadly at her,

"How’d my favorite Angel Girl sleep?"

Releasing her hold on him and sitting down on the stool beside of him, Monica kept a grip on his warm hand and gave him a real smile,

"Honestly, I slept rather well for the first time in months. Thanks to you, Andrew…"

"I didn’t do so much, sweetie," Andrew shrugged his shoulders, wishing he could ward off the conversation he was about to have with her, but he knew that he had to, despite the voice of the Father telling him that he didn’t need to do this,

"I’m glad you’re doing better."

Grinning, as he seemed to try to avoid being given any praise, Monica gave his hand another squeeze and was about to open her mouth to reply when her friend interrupted.

"Wanta go for a walk, Monica?" He asked, rising to his feet and pulling her up with him,

"I’ve got some things I need to talk with you about, sweetie, and I don’t want to exactly do it here…"

"Of course," Monica frowned, concerned, as she rose with him and wrapped her arm around his waist as his own arm encircled her thin shoulders, making her feel even warmer. Tightly gripping him as if almost afraid to let him go, the Irish angel’s heart fluttered nervously as they exited the log cabin and walked out into the cool morning sunshine, where it was slightly breezy, but cool enough for a nice walk and talk with her best friend.

Silence passed between the two friends as the just walked, both holding onto the other, and taking in the mountains and the beautiful view around them. Birds chirped in the morning breeze and Monica smiled at what was around her, although the nervousness over what Andrew wanted to talk to her about wouldn’t leave her stomach. Finally, she broke that silence as she released him and turned to face him.

"Andrew, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?" She gently pushed, tilting her head and looking at him,

"You seem so tense and nervous; you know you don’t have to be nervous around me, my friend…"

"I know, baby girl," Andrew’s voice suddenly became choked up with tears he tried to hold back,

"I know…" Reaching for her hands, the blonde Search and Rescue angel held onto them tightly, as if this would be the last time he would ever have physical contact with her.

"Then what is it?" Monica softly whispered, her voice so low that Andrew had to lean in closer to hear her words. Feeling her tightly grip his hands, Andrew kept his gaze on their entwined fingers before he finally spoke.

"Angel Girl, you know I love you more than my own life, don’t you?"

"Of course I know that, Andrew," Monica smiled reassuringly at him as she let go of his hands and wrapped her arms around his waist in a tight hug; but she was taken aback as she felt him give her a warm squeeze quickly and then pulled back,

"Andrew?"

"Sweetheart, I don’t know how to really say this, so I’m just gonna say it," Andrew choked out through tears as he stared into those worried brown eyes that were like a window to her soul,

"Monica, Carla and I had a talk after you finally were able to get some sleep last night. We talked about a lot of things-it was mainly in regards to Tess. Most of the things we talked about, I know I have to settle with her on our own time, whenever she returns, but we also talked about something else, Angel Girl…something I have to tell you, I NEED to tell you, because I love both you and Tess so much."

"And I love you too, Andy," Monica whispered, feeling tears threatening her own eyes at the sight of his tear-filled, green eyes,

"You know that…"

Unable to meet her doe-like brown eyes, which were starting to flood with tears of their own, Andrew just blurted out his earlier conversation with Carla from the night before all the while, his heart pounding like a million drums,

"Baby girl…I think we need to cool down for a while."

"Cool down?" Monica repeated, her brow furrowing as she took a step back from him,

"Andrew…what do you mean?"

"What I mean is this, Monica," Andrew replied, his voice shaking as the tears streaked his pale cheeks,

"I know that I hurt Tess terribly over the course of the past few months, even as we were separated, but…Angel Girl…I never really knew how deeply until I talked with Carla last night…"

"Andrew, I’m confused, what are you talking about?" Monica whispered, looking at him and trying to meet his eyes, but her heart broke as he refused to meet them.

"Over the course of the many years we’ve been best friends, Monica, Tess has never once spoken anything against it and I know that this is a gift from the Father; I’ve always known that," Andrew spoke tearfully as he folded his arms across his chest nervously,

"But I know…I know that Tess had to have been hurt by this friendship. She had to have been. On some occasions I saw some look of sadness in her eyes as the two of us were together and she was left out in the cold. She’s always been there for both of us, baby-every time we needed her, she was there with a shoulder to cry on and a sympathetic and listening ear. But this time…this time, I refused to listen to her when I was so angry at her and never gave her a chance to explain her part of the story. Instead, I kicked her out of the room and practically my existence too, Monica. Angel Girl, I know that Tess and I have been friends even longer than you and I, and the same goes with you and Tess, but…There have been so many times when we left Tess out of our friendship that it had to have hurt her feelings deeply, but she never once said a word. Honey, when I say we need to cool down…I literally mean that. I don’t want to do this, Monica, but I don’t want to hurt Tess any more than I have and I think it’s time for the two of us to separate for the time being and let you spend some time with her…starting soon, whenever she comes back…"

"What?" Monica choked out, her heart thudding at his words. He couldn’t mean this! Could he??

"Andrew, you don’t believe this, do you-"

"Yes, I do, baby girl," He replied tearfully as the tears came hard from his eyes and Monica noticed the great pain this caused him to have to tell her this.

"But Andrew…you can’t just-you can’t!!" She stuttered, taking a step closer to him to try and wrap her arms around him again as her own tears fell from her eyes, but she watched painfully as he stepped away from her,

"Andrew…"

"I’m sorry, Angel Girl." Not sure he was able to say anything else without really breaking down into sobs, and unable to see the tears in Monica’s eyes at the pain he’d now caused her, Andrew turned on his heel and headed back to the cabin, leaving the weeping Irish angel by herself.

"Andrew!" She choked out after him, taking a shaky step towards him, but didn’t get any far as she fell to her knees on the ground. His words had torn through her tender heart and although she knew that he loved her dearly-after all, he had said so himself-and he hadn’t even raised his voice or gotten angry with her, the pain, however, was so deep that she just continued to weep uncontrollably.

But she didn’t even know that as she sat on the forest floor, Tess had stepped up behind her and was watching her form shudder. The elderly angel appeared to have heard every word of the conversation and her own eyes were filled with grief, tears and also love. It wasn’t until she spoke to Monica that the younger angel turned around and faced her.

"Monica?"

Chapter 12

Startled, Monica looked up through blurred vision into the eyes of her supervisor as she rose shakily to her feet. She opened her mouth as if to say something, but the words would not come and she knew by the look on Tess’ face that she had heard every word. Shaking her head helplessly, she covered her face with her hands as she continued to cry.

Tess approached her young charge and took her into her arms, noting the way the angel slumped up against her as if defeated by all that the world had to offer. Holding her tightly, Tess sighed softly, wondering if there was any end in sight to the pain that continued to flow through the three of them,

"Oh baby girl," She whispered sadly, knowing that Andrew had just broken her heart, which had still been fragile enough as it was,

"He didn’t mean it, Angel Girl. He’s misguided right now is all."

A million thoughts ran through the Irish angel’s mind as she wept against Tess’ shoulder, even as she struggled to speak to find out the answers to her questions,

"D..did you know, Tess? Did you know Philip would rape me?"

"Yes and no, baby," the older angel uttered, tears falling from her own eyes,

"I knew something terrible was going to happen to you. I tried to stop it, Angel Girl, which is why I acted the way I did, but to imagine something like that happening to you was more than I could bear. But I couldn’t frighten you or Andrew by telling you what I thought and that has made this such a huge mess, baby."

"Have…have we hurt you, Tess?" She wept softly, trying to deny what she was feeling in her mind,

"Does our friendship hurt you?"

"Oh baby, no," Tess choked out, running her hand through her dear friend’s auburn hair,

"I know you both love me, Angel Girl and it is only natural that the two of you are close. What you both have together is something I find beautiful, baby. What he said to you has only happened because of what I started by reacting the way I did on board that ship and I’m so sorry, Angel Girl. I know I’ve said it before, but now that you know the truth I feel the need to say it again."

"Beth was my assignment," Monica whispered miserably,

"I did what I was supposed to do…it isn’t your fault…"

"I should have handled it better, Monica. I handled it in a hurtful way, for both of you and this has all gone on long enough," She pulled away and brushed at the tears on Monica’s pale face, her own eyes concerned for the haunted look in her charge’s dark eyes,

"Lets you and I head back to that cabin and make this right once and for all, baby."

But Tess was stopped dead in her tracks as Monica shook her head.

"I can’t, Tess…I can’t…" She whispered, the tears still spilling over.

"Angel Girl?" Tess looked at her friend, trying to figure out what this was all about.

"I know why he said those things…and I can’t go back there," She replied shakily, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand,

"I know what happened with Beth and I was supposed to happen, but Tess…it changed everything…"

"Monica, what are you talking about, baby?" Tess asked gently, seeing the torment in the younger angel’s eyes.

"He doesn’t look at me the same…he can’t…that’s why he wants this…" Her Irish lilt was thick from her tears as she stammered out the painful words,

"He…he wouldn’t even let me touch him after he said those things…he’s ashamed of me, Tess…he is…"

"Monica," Tess’ voice was stern as she took the other angel by the shoulders,

"That is simply not true, baby--."

"It is, Tess!" She cried out, her eyes filled with shame,

"He never asked me what I thought…he told me how it was going to be…that he didn’t want to see me anymore…and then…he just walked away! I…I could understand if he wanted us to spend more time… with you if you had been hurt by our…friendship…but he said we needed to separate…period!"

"Angel Girl, he would never do that to you!" Tess cried out, her own heart breaking at what the younger thought.

"This has never happened to me before, Tess! And for him to suddenly do this, now?? I’m not going back…I can’t face him, I can’t!"

"Then what do you plan to do, baby?" Her supervisor asked, willing to try another tactic.

"I want to go back to work…please Tess, please? I have to…" She begged, trying to stop the flow of tears,

"Please Father, let me go back to doing Your work…" Hearing a gentle voice in her aching heart, she nodded her head,

"He said I could…" She uttered weakly.

Tess sighed, hearing it too and knowing that regardless of how much she and Andrew needed to talk, about their own problems, as well as this latest misunderstanding, or what had to be a misunderstanding, there was no way she could leave Monica alone right now,

"I’m coming with you, baby." She replied, knowing her young charge would need a listening ear from time to time as she healed, if she ever would after today.

Nodding her head, Monica turned numbly to begin walking away, before she stopped for a moment, fresh tears stinging in her eyes. Slowly and with great reluctance, she slipped off the flannel shirt she wore overtop her turtleneck sweater and walking over, she hung it on the branch of a nearby tree. Shaking uncontrollably and her heart breaking all over again, she unhooked the bracelet from her wrist that her best friend had given her so long ago and placed it in the pocket of the shirt. Her fingers running over the soft fabric one last time, she turned away, lest she break down completely again.

"Baby, you don’t want to do that, Angel Girl." Tess whispered softly.

"I can’t be reminded, Tess," She replied, her voice tinged with heavy sadness,

"It would hurt too much."

***

Andrew sat alone on the porch late that night, his heart grieving heavily over what had transpired that day. He knew how badly he had hurt his friend, but what he hadn’t expected was for her to not return to the cabin and he was worried about her.

He really hadn’t meant to leave her there, crying and not fully understanding, especially after all she had been through, but his own grief and pain over what he was doing had made it impossible for him to stay a moment longer, lest he back down from what he felt in his heart was the right thing to do.

But he hadn’t expected to miss her already.

His thoughts traveled back to that morning, when she had been happier than he had remembered seeing her in so long and he felt guilt tearing through his fragile heart, even as he struggled to remind himself why he had done this in the first place.

Tess and the hurt she had to feel as she watched his friendship with the younger angel.

But the look of hurt in the doe-like brown eyes he loved so much wouldn’t leave his mind, and the handsome angel, bowed his head and wept.

Chapter 13

3 months later…

Rose hummed softly to herself as she walked across the stretched-out field, her blue eyes searching for the young angel she hadn’t seen in several months per order of the Father. But now, she had been directed to this very spot to wait for Andrew and although the red-haired angel was confused, she knew better than to question Him again.

The pat 3 months had started off difficult, especially after Rose had heard about what Andrew had requested of Monica and after that, although she knew both his heart and the little Irish angel’s, were broken, God had directed her former charge back to work…like Monica and Tess. Yes, she was more than confused about why Andrew had acted towards his best friend the way he did and knowing that her friends were hurt broke her own heart, Rose knew that she didn’t hold any anger towards any of them…or at God, although she found herself questioning Him more often than not, even after He had told her to go back to work, too.

One by one, each angel was told to go back and now…Rose hadn’t seen Andrew, Monica, Tess or even Carla for a very long, slow 3 months. She missed each of her friends deeply, but at the same time, she was concerned about how they were handling everything, specifically Andrew and Monica.

"Rose? Is that you?"

Rose turned at the familiar sound of Andrew’s voice and she smiled broadly as she locked eyes with his wide, green ones. Even from a distance, although she spotted a look of happiness in her friend’s eyes at seeing her, the elderly angel didn’t miss the deep sadness there on his handsome face.

"Andrew." She replied, walking towards him quickly, her arms outstretched. As she space closed between her former charge and herself, Rose wrapped Andrew into her arms tightly as tears threatened her blue eyes and spilled down her face,

"How’re you doing, honey?" She asked as she continued holding onto him.

"A little better, Rose…a little better," He softly replied, gripping his older friend tightly,

"You?"

"It’s just good to see you again, Angel Boy. Three months is way too long…" She answered, and several moments later, the two angels finally released one another, Rose still noticing the sadness lurking in his compassionate, green eyes,

"What are we doing here?" Andrew finally asked, sticking his hands in the pockets of his jacket,

"Or more like, what are you doing here, Rose? The Father gave me a week off from work and, well, I sometimes like coming to this spot to think and rest my mind after long days, you know?"

"I know," The other angel gently replied, her eyes never leaving his face. Reaching a hand out and hooking her arm through the crook of his, Rose gave her younger friend and former charge a loving smile as she encouraged him to walk with her,

"How’s work been?"

"Busy…very busy," He replied quickly, but before Rose could even reply, Andrew immediately changed the subject,

"Have you seen the others?"

"You mean…have I seen Monica?" Rose raised an eyebrow and eyed him as she saw him flinch at the mention of his best friend, the younger Irish angel,

"No, honey, I haven’t seen any of them since we all separated; you’re the first." A long silence followed her words before Rose spoke up again,

"But however, I know the Father didn’t bring the two of us back together today for no reason. There’s a reason for everything, so…let’s just take a walk and see where He leads us, hmm?"

Smiling as she saw him nod his head sadly, the angel gave Andrew’s arm a squeeze before they continued walking and eventually returned to earth.

*****

Thirty minutes later, both Rose and Andrew found themselves standing on the sidewalk outside of a building and a large crowd of humans were gathered around a bunch of televisions that were set up behind a large glass window. The news was showing from what it appeared and Andrew’s heart soon started pounding for a reason he was unsure of at the moment.

Shooting a glance at his older and more experienced friend, the blonde Search and Rescue angel came closer to the back of the crowd and stood on his toes to see above some people’s heads. Feeling a sense of relief as a few humans moved to the side to allow him to take a look, Andrew glued his green eyes to one of the televisions where a reporter was standing before a large prison and before the angel could make out what was going on, a large mug shot photo of the man that had been imprinted in his mind for the last year, appeared on the television screen. His face turned white and as he allowed himself to hear the words the reporter was saying, Andrew found himself speechless as his world suddenly came to a screeching halt again.

Slowly backing away from the crowd and back to his waiting friend, who he knew had seen and heard the whole thing, Andrew felt himself growing lightheaded. Still not finding his voice, the angel just stared at Rose for a few horrific moments before he croaked out,

"He…he escaped…" Tears sprang to his green eyes as he repeated more loudly,

"Rose…Philip escaped!"

*****

Late that night, Andrew and Rose entered the cabin they had left a little over 3 months earlier and before either angel knew it, Carla had bolted towards them and had thrown her arms around Andrew in a back-breaking hug. Taken aback by this and feeling her trembling with sobs in his arms, Andrew tried to hold back his own tears, but failed.

"Andrew…Rose…You had to have heard…" She whimpered as she clung to one of the angels like a life preserver, burying her tear-stained face against his jacket,

"Philip…He-he…"

"I know…" Andrew choked out, tears in his own voice and eyes as he spoke,

"I know, Carla…"

"Oh God, what are we going to do??" She whimpered as she still refused to let him go. Feeling the gentle hand of Rose rubbing her back soothingly, that didn’t comfort the youngest angel, but only made her sob louder,

"What are we going to do…?"

"We’re going to stay put until Monica gets here, that’s what we’re going to do." The voice of Tess sounded and for the first time, both Andrew and Rose spotted her rising up from the living room couch and nearing them. Gently pulling out of Carla’s arms, but taking a hold of her hand comfortingly, Andrew took a long deep breath and faced his supervisor for the first time since he practically kicked her out of the cabin,

"Tess…" He whispered, not really sure of what to say right then, wondering if she hated his guts for his words and accusations to her.

"Hello, baby," The elder replied, on her part hoping that he wouldn’t snap at her for calling him that name,

"It’s been a while…"

"Yes it has," Andrew replied, not moving from his spot. Although his anger at her was gone, it was replaced by guilt in his heart, as he knew that he had hurt her deeply all those months ago…and all of the years he had been best friends with Monica. Meeting the older angel’s eyes and seeing the tears that brimmed in them, Andrew’s heart immediately went out to her and fear for the sake of his friends once again gripped him like a vice. He loved his supervisor with all his heart and he hoped that when Monica arrived, she would know that, too; but if anything happened to any of them because of what he had done and because of Philip escaping…he would never forgive himself.

Pushing the somewhat nervous feeling of coming closer to Tess aside for the time being, Andrew dropped Carla’s hand and took a step towards his supervisor. As they came face to face, the Search and Rescue angel reached a hand out and took hold of Tess’ hand gently in his own, giving it a squeeze,

"I’m glad you’re okay, Tess…"

Gulping as she met her "Angel Boy’s" green eyes, which still held so much sadness and fear towards everything that had occurred the last year, Tess squeezed his hand back with the same gentleness in it,

"You too, Andrew…you too."

Tears filling his eyes and rolling down his cheeks, Andrew closed them for a brief moment and blinked back another round before releasing her hand and wrapping his arm around her shoulders in a quick hug. Almost expecting her to pull back from him, Andrew breathed a sigh of relief as he felt her arm wrap around his waist tightly. Sucking in a deep, shaky breath, Andrew then released her and turned back to Carla and Rose, who had closed the door tightly.

"Where…Where is Monica?" He asked fearfully, hoping and praying with all his heart that Philip hadn’t gotten his hands on her again.

"She hasn’t arrived yet, Andrew," Carla replied in answer to his question, walking on shaky feet to the living room couch and taking a seat, Andrew soon following,

"She should be here very soon…the Father would tell her, I know He would."

"Yes, He most definitely would, Angel Child," Tess said with as much authority as she could put in her voice at that moment, sitting down on a nearby chair,

"And that angel will show up; we know her like the back of our halos, so she’s got to show up. Why wouldn’t she?"

Wringing his hands together as he looked down at them, Andrew forced himself to breathe properly as his mind traveled to what could possibly happen to his dearest friend if she never showed up. ‘Andrew, you’re worrying yourself sick…She will show up and you all will talk about this and what to do. Just calm down…calm down…’

But even as he felt Carla’s hand grasp his in her own and squeeze it tightly as if to give herself strength, Andrew still felt anything but calm and only grew more worried.

*****

Monica sucked in her breath as she looked out the window of the plane and forced herself to not throw up. She hated heights about as much as she hated the dark and water, but she knew that she had to get over these fears and since she knew it was the Father’s request for her to get away on her own, she had caught the first flight out to China with God’s blessings.

‘You know I can’t face Andrew again, Lord…’ She whispered to herself as she turned away from the window and glanced over at the person beside of her, who was snoring away in his seat. Closing her brown eyes for a brief moment to get a hold of her emotions, she soon opened them again and turned back to the window and seeing how dark it was right now, but the only light she could see was that of the stars and the great statue that towered below from the ground: The Statue of Liberty.

"Oh Andrew…" She whispered to herself as she leaned her head against her seat, tuning out the voice of the Father telling her once again that He was in control and also the sound of the man snoring in the seat next to her, Monica then allowed the tears to come for the first since she had discarded her dearest friends’ gifts to her from the past in the forest all those months ago…

"Andrew, I still love you…Be well, my friend."

Chapter 14

Four hours later…

Tess watched as Andrew paced nervously back and forth inside of the cabin, his green eyes distressed and his brow furrowed with concern. She had been trying to reassure him that Monica would indeed show up, but a part of her wondered if she really would, knowing what her Angel Girl believed about that day Andrew had decided that they needed to "cool it" for the time being. Though she had tried to convince the younger angel that Andrew’s decision had nothing to do with what had happened with Philip, she knew she had done little to dispel those fears and beliefs from Monica’s heart and she also knew it would break Andrew’s heart if he knew what his best friend thought.

But Tess continued to hope that Monica would show up so that all of this could be resolved once and for all. She had been able to spend some time with her young charge over the last few months and she continued to be concerned by Monica’s refusing to discuss any of it; what happened on board that ship or even the situation with Andrew. Tess didn’t want to be the one to tell Andrew all of this, but she would if she had to in order to start the process of making things right.

Even though she and her Angel Boy had some working out of things to do as well.

"I can’t wait any longer," Andrew uttered finally, running a hand roughly through his blond hair,

"I’ve got to go and find her. If Philip is at large, she could be in danger and if he so much as lays another finger on her.." He stopped in mid sentence, not wanting his anger at the human to get out of control,

"She should be here by now."

Carla was growing more distraught as well as time went by and now she wrung her hands nervously,

"You don’t think he’s found her, do you?"

"I don’t know," He replied worriedly, exchanging a glance with her,

"But if we were all supposed to meet here, I’m not sure of what else to think."

"Angel Boy.." Tess began hesitantly, hating to tell him the truth, especially now when the tensions were running so high,

"It is highly possible that she is fine, and just not choosing to come."

Andrew looked at Tess, sharply, his expression one of confusion,

"Why would she do that? She would know how worried we would be."

Tess sighed softly as she indicated the seat on the sofa beside of her,

"Sit down for a minute, Andrew and let’s talk. There’s something you should know," Waiting until he sat down, and seeing the concern in Rose and Carla’s eyes as well, Tess continued as gently as she could,

"A few months back, when you told Monica you thought the two of you should separate for awhile, I was there in the woods as well."

"What?" He uttered, not ready to believe that Tess had heard every word.

"That’s right, Andrew. I heard what you asked of her and I made myself known when you left and our little Angel Girl was crying like her heart was going to break. I didn’t know at the time how you would react to me, so I didn’t let you know I was there. Maybe I should have anyway, then maybe I could have stopped all this."

"Stopped what, Tess?" Rose asked softly.

Tentatively, Tess reached for Andrew’s hand, thankful when he didn’t pull away,

"Monica thinks that the reason you asked for the two of you to separate, is because of what she took for Beth, baby. She thinks you’re ashamed of her and you see her as less than what she was…"

"What?!" Andrew cried out, tears rushing to his eyes at the words Tess had just spoken,

"But that isn’t true, Tess! Nothing could be further from the truth!"

"I know that, Andrew, but I was unable to convince her of that. I know what you asked of her was equally painful for you, and that is why you were trying to avoid her that day. But when you wouldn’t look at her or allow her to touch you…that’s what she thinks, baby, because of how she feels about herself. She isn’t angry with you at all, but just accepts this as what she thinks is the truth," She finished softly, her heart aching at the tears that ran down his face,

"While I’m touched, Andrew at what you were trying to do, I don’t resent your friendship with that little angel. It’s something I’ve loved watching over the years and the closeness you two share warms my heart every time I see you both together."

Andrew nodded his head numbly; still trying to fathom the amount of hurt he had caused his best friend. No wonder she had not returned to the cabin that day,

"It seems the three of us have a lot to talk about, Tess," He whispered miserably,

"There are things I need you to know too, but right now, I just need a little air." Rising to his feet, he headed for the door of the cabin, praying that just maybe his best friend might be nearby but afraid to come in for fear of seeing him.

"You be careful, Andrew," Rose warned, concern in her blue eyes,

"Don’t go far, all right?"

"I won’t, Rose," he uttered, forcing back another round of tears before he slipped out the door.

****

Andrew wandered aimlessly as the sun began to set in the sky, his heart grieving over what Tess had just told him. There had been so much hurt over the last nine months since they had all left that ship and he just wanted it all to be over with. He wasn’t even sure of where to begin with Tess, though he thought she had forgiven him, it was his previous unwillingness to forgive her that still weighed heavily on his conscience.

And then there was Monica…

Tears fell from his eyes as he came upon the spot in the woods where he had told her they needed to go their separate ways. He had known at the time she would be hurt, but he had never imagined it would hurt her in the way that it did. His mind traveled back to the day, remembering her words and his actions and his heart broke all over again.

[I][b] "Andrew, I’m confused, what are you talking about?" Monica whispered, looking at him and trying to meet his eyes, but her heart broke as he refused to meet them.

"But Andrew…you can’t just-you can’t!!" She stuttered, taking a step closer to him to try and wrap her arms around him again as her own tears fell from her eyes, but she watched painfully as he stepped away from her,

"Andrew…"[/I][/b]

"It’s no wonder you thought that, baby girl," He wept softly, thinking of how just the night before, she had finally began to release her emotions, and though he had thought he had convinced her that he looked at her no differently, his actions the following day had clouded those words from that night.

Looking up through blurred vision he drew in a sharp breath as he saw something hanging from the tree not far away from where he stood. Already knowing what it was, he walked forward as though in a trance and slowly lifted the flannel shirt from the branch.

She had been wearing it that day and now he could feel her pain so clearly in her leaving it behind. He wrapped his arms around it, as the tears came harder, before he realized that there was something in the pocket. His hand shaking, he pulled out the charm bracelet he had given her after they had resolved everything that had happened with Erin and her daughter all those years ago.

Closing his hand around it, he wept helplessly his heart crying out to his best friend,

"I’m so sorry, Angel Girl!"

"Well, well, well, what have we here?"

Hearing a voice, the distraught angel turned around and found himself face to face with Philip and he felt anger rising up inside of him at all the pain this human had caused.

"If it isn’t Monica’s little boyfriend," He sneered, his dark eyes flashing menacingly.

As a surge of fresh anger raced through him, Andrew gave out a cry as he lunged towards the human, his anger and frustration at all that had happened, finally getting the better of him.

But Philip was quicker and before Andrew even knew what had happened, Philip had hit him upside the head with the handle of his gun, knocking the angel to the ground.

Andrew’s last thoughts were of his best friend, before everything went black.

****

Monica gazed out the window of the plane once more, after having given up on sleep. She never could sleep in an airplane, but her soul was weary and she had been willing to try. Daylight was just breaking on this side of the world and she squinted before pulling the blind down on her window.

Closing her eyes once more in an attempt to sleep, she suddenly opened them again as tears rushed to the surface.

Andrew was in trouble.

She could feel it in her heart as it pounded loudly in her chest,

"Oh Father, please…" She whispered tearfully,

"Keep him safe…please."

For the first time in her existence, she knew her best friend was in trouble, and that there was absolutely nothing she could do.

Chapter 15

Some torturous minutes later, Andrew groggily awakened only to find himself in total darkness, but as he tried to move, he found that he wasn’t able to. Opening his green eyes weakly, the angel now in complete human form was then able to make out the unmistakable dark eyes of Philip and suddenly, he remembered what had occurred several minutes ago right before he lost consciousness: Finding the shirt he had given to Monica several months ago and the friendship bracelet that had been a gift to her from himself in its pocket. Just as he had been about ready to break down at what he had spoken to his best friend just 3 months ago about them needing to "cool it", the voice of the rapist that had been on board the ship almost a year ago had broken into his thoughts and just as he had been about ready to attack the man, Andrew had been knocked out from what he believed to be Philip’s gun.

Now, the angel lay on the hard ground of who knew where, flat on his back, and he tried to move again, but still found it impossible. Squinting to see in the darkness, he was able to make out his hands by his side and although he was scared out of his mind, he also felt a sense of relief that this time he wasn’t tied up. Once again trying to move, Andrew felt more fear and confusion rise up within him at this situation; what did Philip do to him?

"Won’t work trying to move, pal," The voice of Philip rang out and Andrew opened his eyes again to only make out the face of the one who had raped his dearest friend and he once again felt anger boiling inside of him towards this man.

"…So don’t even bother trying," He continued, pacing back in forth in front of Andrew and the angel’s heart pounded loudly in his chest as he tried to make out where in the world he was, but it was so dark that he couldn’t,

"At least not until I know where that precious girl named MONICA is, Andrew." The Search and Rescue angel felt tears once again welling up in his green eyes as he heard Philip laughing, but he forced himself to blink them back. There was no way on this Earth he was going to allow himself to cry in front of this monster!

"But of course you’ll be too late for that, buddy," He continued, winking at the angel as if this was some sort of game,

"I’ve given you the same drug I gave your precious friends on that ship, but only this time, I doubled the dosage so it’ll take you longer to be able to even TRY to get some help or run away. So there’s no use trying; you’ll only be wasting your energy, my friend."

Wishing then with all of his heart that he could punch this man out for what he was saying, and once again trying with all of his might to move, Andrew closed his eyes tightly as he found it impossible to even open his mouth and speak. He was unable to do anything except listen to this man…

"And I’ll tell you right now," Philip continued, stopping the pacing in front of the human angel,

"If I don’t find your little girlfriend…it’ll be all over for not only for you and Monica, but the rest of your friends, too."

*****

As the night grew darker, Tess glanced down at her watch and drew in a shaky breath as she saw the time: 10:00. Andrew should have been back by now and it had been over 2 hours since he had left to be on his own…’Tess, you’re being overprotective,’ She tried to assure herself and tried to calm her racing heart,

‘Andrew can take care of himself; he’s a big angel…He doesn’t need you a total wreck when he comes back. You KNOW that.’

"Tess? Rose?" Carla spoke up and the two older angels turned to look at the other younger caseworker,

"I know that this may sound crazy, but I’m getting worried about Andrew. I mean, it’s closing in on 3 hours since he had left…and the Father still hasn’t told any of us where Monica took off to, if she did take off some place. Can’t one of us go and look for him? I’m just getting this terrible feeling that something isn’t right here…"

"Andrew doesn’t need us to worry about him, Angel Child," Tess tried to speak as reassuringly as she could to try and calm Carla down, even as her own heart raced with fear,

"He’s always been able to take care of himself-"

"Remember though, when Denise disguised herself as Brianna not too long ago and she held him captive for several days in a cabin very much like this one?" Carla demanded, her voice shaking with fear and confusion,

"Yes, he is tough and he can take care of himself…but evil sometimes thinks they can outdo good and…and Philip is just plain EVIL! Just like Denise is!"

"Are you saying that you think that Philip is hurting him right now??" Rose stood to her feet and started to walk to the other side of the living room,

"But Carla, the Father would’ve told us-"

"We do have to go after him."

Both Rose and Carla turned towards Tess, who held a haunted look on her dark features and she sat on the couch, as if frozen in her spot. But she turned her brown eyes towards her friends anyway, her eyes filled with hot tears,

"No, I have to go after him…He has just told me…"

"Told you what, Tess?" Rose’s face paled as she looked at her fellow angel. Just the thought of her and Tess’ "Angel Boy" in some sort of trouble with Philip made her want to either sob buckets or go after this man herself, although she knew that as an angel, she couldn’t do that,

"The Father is telling you to go find Andrew?"

"That’s what He’s saying, Rose…Your instincts are correct, Angel Child. Andy IS with Philip-and I’m the one He is calling to go find him," Here, the usually so in control angel choked on a sob,

"But He won’t tell me where he’s at…"

*****

"…You know I always keep good on my promises, Andrew," Philip was saying as he leaned in close to Andrew and stared into the tortured angel’s bruised and frightened face,

"So I’m going to leave you with a little friend of mine for a while here, but don’t worry. I WILL be back-with Monica, mind you."

Shooting a glance over his shoulder and waving another dark figure over to him, Philip smirked as Andrew’s eyes suddenly came to focus on the demon who he had encountered over 3 months ago.

Denise.

"Now, before you start asking questions, Andrew…" Philip stopped talking in mid-sentence and shared an evil laugh with Denise before turning back to the angel,

"I think it’s pretty obvious now that I know who you are, ANGEL BOY. And I think you now know in that pretty head of yours who I am: I’m a demon, just like my friend Denise is…and I hope you know that when I find that Monica angel-or maybe it should be Rose or Carla-you all will have a choice to make, all right?"

Shooting a smirk at his fellow demon before leaning over and kissing her cheek, Philip walked to the entry way that lead to the mouth of the large, dark cave but not before waving Denise over one last time and whispering something in her ear. Andrew, however, even in his current state, was able to make out what was being said and his stomach churned and felt ready to hurl at these words:

"Don’t worry, my love. They WILL pay for how they treated you."

Chapter 16

"Hello, honey," Denise crooned as she looked at Andrew with a wicked smile on her evil face which showed that she was amused to no end that the angel was unable to move, yet alone talk,

"Guess Philip had you fooled, huh? I mean, you knew he wasn’t a nice person, but you had no idea he was working with me. Wonder why your wonderful God didn’t tell you that, sugar?"

Andrew glared at her, as that was the best he could do under the circumstances. His heart was pounding so loudly, he was sure it would beat out of his chest before too long. He was gripped with fear, not only for himself, but also for his dearest friend, who for all he knew, could already be in the clutches of the demon who had hurt her to begin with.

"You have to admit, Andrew, this is an interesting situation," Denise mused as she walked around the immobile angel as if deep in thought,

"I mean, here you are, unable to move or do anything, completely at my mercy. An angel of God, completely defenseless against evil," She drew back her foot and gave the angel a good, swift kick in the ribs as if to stress her point, delighting in the pain that filled his green eyes,

"And soon, Monica will be completely defenseless against Philip as well. I can’t wait till he tells her who he is and that he knows all about what she took for Beth," Denise laughed, obviously enjoying herself in this rare moment of sheer power,

"I’ve waited for a long time for this moment, Andrew. The possibility of destroying the two of you is something that appeals to me very much. Why don’t you just save us the trouble of all of this and just agree to turn away?"

Andrew moaned inwardly as he was unable to voice the pain he felt over her kick. His troubled mind was filled with terrible images of what could happen to he and to Monica. He remembered once again, finding the shirt and the bracelet and his heart grieved for his words that day and what they must have done to her in the vulnerable state she had still been in at the time. But then in those moments, he had been so consumed in guilt over the way he had been reacting with Tess that he had been unable to see the additional damage he was causing to the friend who was part of his heart and soul,

"My soul mate," He thought as his mind traveled back to that day in the cabin nearly a year ago now and the words she had spoken to him.

[I] "I told you once that I didn't know if angels could have soul mates, but I've made a decision on that. I think we can, because the bond I feel with you, Andrew, is deeper than that of friend. You're a part of me…a part of my soul; a part I never want to lose. Just the fact that we know when one of us needs the other tells me that the bond is a much deeper one and the two things that make me happiest in this world are doing the Father's work and being with you. There could be no greater gift, Andrew and I'm so thankful to have them both."[/I]

Andrew closed his eyes for a moment, the pain in his heart even greater than the pain in his ribs and head now. Somehow, he had managed to make a mess out of two of his dearest friendships and he knew that Denise knew that. But still, he would never go with her. He would take all it was this demon could dish out, believing his troubled heart that the Father was still very much in control and that he would get out of this mess.

Then he would work with everything inside of him on making amends with his supervisor and his best friend.

Sensing his stubbornness, Denise frowned,

"Looks like you need a bit more encouragement, sugar," She hissed angrily, before she delivered the first of several kicks to his ribs and stomach.

Closing his eyes in anguish, the angel, who was completely at her mercy as she had said, cried out one thought in his tormented mind,

"Father!!"

****

Monica wandered aimlessly along the streets of Royal Cliff in China, her troubled eyes gazing out over the water, which was several feet away. She wasn’t even sure of what she was doing here ( and neither did Kim) but her heart was far too heavy to even consider returning to the states at this point.

Though she couldn’t shake the feeling that Andrew was in some kind of trouble, she also knew he didn’t want to see her; he had made that all too clear three months ago. She still loved him with everything in her, and she simply accepted the fact that what had happened to her with Philip had caused her best friend’s feelings for her to change. It wasn’t his fault, but only the fact of how it was.

She gazed down at her wrist, once again surprised to not see the bracelet that she had worn for years until a few months ago. Tears filled her eyes as she remembered Andrew telling her about each charm that had daintily hung from the gold chain, each one carefully selected by him with thought and love. But that had been a different time and place altogether. Everything had changed now, herself included.

"Well, well, well, look who we have here?"

Monica’s head jerked up at the sound of the voice that was enough to send shivers of fear up her spine, and found herself face to face with Philip once more. The color drained from her face as she backed up a step and struggled to find her voice as all the while horrible, painful images flashed through her already tormented mind,

"What do you want from me??" She uttered, her voice scarcely audible.

"Just to talk, little angel, nothing more," He replied though she didn’t miss the evil glint in his cold eyes,

"I’ve missed you, you know."

Feeling herself beginning to shake uncontrollably, Monica fought to not let her fear show,

"I want you to get away from me."

He laughed softly, his eyes never leaving her,

"Now, is that anyway to talk to the one you shared so much with?" He crooned, loving her horrified expression as she realized he knew the truth,

"That’s right, little angel, I know all about what happened that night. You see, I’m a good friend of an old friend of yours. I’m sure you remember her…Denise?"

Monica felt as if the world were spinning as she struggled to comprehend what it was he was saying. He KNEW! This horrible being in front of her knew what she had done for Beth that night and the thought of it made her want to be sick. The tremors intensified as she listened as he continued.

"Yeah, Denise and I go way back. You see, she always said she hated your purity and innocence more than anything else, so she felt a lot better when I told her that had been stripped from you on board that ship a few months ago," He smiled, almost sympathetically,

"And I know all about what happened with Andrew too. Seems he just can’t look at you and see his ‘baby girl’ anymore, isn’t that right, little angel? Not now that he knows what happened to you. It must hurt to know that he was only a fair weathered friend. Turns his back on you the moment your innocence is taken away," He shook his head sadly,

"He acts as if it were your fault! You were only defending a poor, little girl who was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

Tears stung in her eyes just as his words stung at her heart, but she still remained silent, not trusting herself to speak.

"You know, Monica, there are those who would never turn their back on you; those who would accept what had happened to you and not hold it against you," He chided gently, trying to read the expression on her pale face,

"I would never do that to you, Monica."

"You’ve done quite enough," She replied, her Irish voice thick from all the emotions she was feeling at that moment. Still, turning away was not an option for her, despite how unworthy she felt of love right now,

"You’re wasting your time…I’m not coming with you." She forced her trembling legs to turn away as she shakily began walking in the other direction.

"I’ve got all the time in the world, little angel," Philip replied, his voice tinged with laughter,

"I’m not giving up that easy. After all, what do you have to stick around here for? God allowed this to happen to you, your best friend can’t stand the sight of you, what else is there? You just need time to realize it."

She stopped short, finding it difficult to breath, as her panic was so great,

"Father, help me, please…" She pleaded in a shaky whisper. Her head bowed, she closed her eyes for a moment, not wanting to accept the words he was saying, even if they were true. Willing herself to walk away, she took another step, nearly screaming when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Looking up, a terrified expression on her ashen face, relief filled her eyes,

"Adam…" She uttered weakly.

****

Ten minutes later, Denise’s tirade seemed to be winding down, as Andrew’s entire body was engulfed in pain. He was struggling to remain alert, but was finding it more and more difficult as the minutes ticked by. This feeling of helplessness was agonizing; not being able to help himself or Monica, who he had a feeling was in trouble herself at this point. He needed to get to her…to help her…to tell her he was sorry…

The pain continued to wash over him like rough waves during a storm and much against his will, the angel closed his eyes, even as his aching body welcomed the darkness.

Chapter 17

Tess wiped at her brown eyes blindly over an hour later as she trudged tiredly through the woods that was located not far from the cabin. By now, the older angel felt lost and had no idea where she was; all she knew, however, was that she was determined to find her "Angel Boy" if it was the last thing she did, and the Father hadn’t directed her to go any other direction.

Although, His voice was still rather quiet to her.

Raising her eyes to the dark night sky, Tess sucked in a deep breath as she suddenly felt a hard rain falling and it immediately drenched her to the skin and bone. On other circumstances, she would have let out a howl and would grow irritated at being wet without an umbrella. But now…Now, the rain was the least of her worries and she would go through hundreds of downpours to help her beloved friends.

And now, Andrew was in trouble and hurting, so he was her goal…and if the Father told her to "Find Andrew", then that’s what she would do.

Taking another step forward, Tess suddenly heard a loud crunch and just the sound of it sent shivers up and down her spine. Although the rain hadn’t lessened any since it first started, the elderly supervisor felt a urge to see what it was she had stepped on. Her heart pounding rapidly in her chest, Tess knelt down on her knees and reached a shaky hand out to pick through the leaves and other debris. But what she suddenly found underneath the leaves and branches shattered her already aching heart.

Although it was now crunched in irreplaceable pieces, Tess made out the used to be shininess of Andrew’s gold pocket watch that he had been given centuries ago by an assignment that was special to him.

Now, it laid in shattered pieces from having been stepped on and as tears streaked her already wet face, Tess took the watch was one of her dearest friend’s and held it close to her heart. Hunched over on the wet ground, the angel sobbed brokenly as she whispered quietly to the darkness…hoping with all of her heart that her special "Angel Boy" would hear her pleas and would be able to tell her where he was.

"Baby, please…please tell Tess where you are. We need you, Angel Boy and I love you so much…"

Her voice broke on another sob and as Tess closed her reddened, brown eyes, memories of times with Andrew flowed through her mind…

*****

(Flashbacks)

"You stole my car!"

Andrew whirled around as he held the rag that was used to wash Tess’ car and he came face to face with his angry supervisor, who looked ready to chew his head off. Running his hand through his shoulder-length, greasy blonde hair, the Angel of Death listened to Tess rant about her "baby".

"You stole it and then you killed it! Look at this, the Angel of Death done killed my car! That car was spotless!"

Wringing his hands together, all the while shifting from foot to foot, Andrew stuttered,

"And it will be again, soon…I-promise…"

"OOHHH!" Tess seethed, throwing her hands up in the air and stomping away,

"OHHHHH!!"

Andrew looked after his older friend and ran his hand through his hair again, hoping that Tess wouldn’t kill HIM if it wasn’t spotless the next time she saw her beloved car…

*****

"Now what’s wrong with you, Angel Boy?" Tess sternly demanded as she stood in front of the Christmas tree and faced her young charge.

"It’s not fair, Tess," Andrew shook his blonde head before walking slowly up to his friend and supervisor and faced her, ready for whatever lecture he was about to get for his earlier attitude towards Tony’s father,

"You and I both know that death can be a beautiful thing…And dying…" As the Angel of Death stopped walking, he finally stood before Tess and looked at her,

"Dying can be hideous. And to watch someone die like that…" His voice cracked with emotion as he continued speaking,

"The way-the way Tony is dying tonight and the way that Jordan is letting him. It’s-it’s WRONG…for Jordan to use death as a punishment!"

Looking into her younger friend’s handsome face, who’s green eyes were starting to brim with tears, Tess’ heart tugged with sympathy and she reached out and grasped Andrew’s hands in her own as she spoke firmly, yet lovingly,

"Now you listen to me, Andrew." Waiting until he met her eyes, she continued,

"In this world, judgment can be the worst KIND of punishment. And God doesn’t want you judging Jordan any more than he wants Jordan judging his son." Meeting his green eyes with her brown ones and seeing her friend nod her head slowly in response to her words, Tess gave him a loving look as she reached a hand out and placed it on his shoulder,

"And remember. Christmas is a time for miracles."

As she was done speaking, Tess saw Andrew’s lower lip begin to tremble and the tears that brimmed in his compassionate eyes now spilled over and down his cheeks. With all the love in the world towards her charge, the older angel reached her arms out and gathered him into her embrace as he sobbed on her shoulder.

*****

"What are we gonna do? They’re going crazy out there!" Andrew ran up to his supervisor, still dressed as a ringmaster and his green eyes grew wide at the realization that they now had no human cannonball and the crowd seemed to be about ready to rip some of them to pieces at any moment.

Scrunching up her nose and speaking in a soft whisper, Tess replied,

"We need a human cannonball…" But before she could finish what she was saying, or even suggest Andrew be that target, her friend interrupted.

"In your dreams." He frowned as he wrinkled his nose in disgust.

"Well…well…" Tess dugged deep into her pocket and pulled out a red clown’s nose. Since her "Angel Boy" wasn’t going to go along with this, this was what she had to do so she could work on finding another replacement,

"You go out there and keep them busy ‘til I figure this out." Placing the red nose on her young charge, Tess was about to turn away when Andrew yanked it off of him and placed it back in her hand, scowling.

"You have GOT to be kidding!"

Now meaning business, Tess put the clown’s nose back on her friend and grabbed him by the shoulder, turning him back towards the arena,

"Don’t you mess with me! GO!" And with a push, she sent him on his way, but not before he shot her one of his famous "looks".

*****

"Are you ready?" Monica shouted over the roar of the plane as she, Andrew and Tess stood on top of it, ready to jump out, parachutes and all.

"Yeah!" Andrew shouted back, getting his arms ready, and the excitement visible in his voice.

"You two go ahead, I’ll catch up with you later…" Tess stated, turning around to go back inside of the small plane where Sam was, but Andrew stopped her by saying.

"Oh, c’mon, Tess!"

"I don’t think so!" She shouted back, holding onto Andrew’s arm tightly as if to keep her from going overboard.

"You’ve never done this before have you?" Monica teased as she looked at her supervisor,

"You’ve taught everyone else, but you’ve never did it yourself!"

"Shhhh!" Tess hissed, once again trying to get away from the edge of the plane, but Andrew and Monica both still held her back from escaping.

"Besides, what are you worried about, honey? It’s not like you’re gonna have a bad landing!" Andrew teased back.

"I just don’t feel the Spirit leading me in this direction!" Tess once again objected, grabbing hold of the Angel of Death’s arm with her other one and trying to push her way back to the plane entrance; but like before she was held back and before either of them knew it, Monica gave a thumb’s up signal to Sam who was sitting inside the plane and he winked back at her as if saying to go ahead and tilt it back so that all three angels would fall backwards.

As the three friends fell backwards, three different shrills of excitement followed, along with a "Woo-hoo!" from Andrew. Sam rolled his eyes heavenward as he watched his friends, but the smile was on his mahogany face as well.

Floating over to her friends, Monica shouted,

"Now that wasn’t so bad, was it, Tess?" Grabbing onto both of her friend’s hands and Andrew doing the same with her and Tess, the three formed a circle above the sky as Tess yelled back.

"I think something just flew up my nose!"

"She likes it! I told you she’d like it!" Andrew smiled as he held tightly to his best friend and supervisor’s hands as joyful laughter followed.

(End Flashbacks)

*****

Not long after Andrew had blacked out from Denise’s beatings, he soon found himself seeing images of his two closest friends, one of them being Monica. The image of the young Irish angel at the hands of Philip wouldn’t leave his mind, and then Carla and Rose…but then it changed to an image of his best friend in some faraway place. Her lovely face was streaked with tears and confusion was written all over it, as if she was unsure of what to do next, now that she was at her destination.

Andrew tried to call out her name, but just like he was right now, he was unable to even open his mouth, speak or move. His entire body was immobile and it was starting to drive him insane. Instead, since his mind was still working properly, Andrew thought to himself, hoping that the connection that the two shared would be working between them…even in the condition it was at the moment,

‘Angel Girl, I’m so sorry…I love you so much, Monica, and I’m so very sorry…’

Suddenly, the image changed to one of Tess, outside in the pouring rain. She was on her knees in the woods, which he guessed was not too far from where he was at the moment and she appeared to be holding something shiny in her hands. In his mind, the angel strained to see what it was his supervisor was holding and his stomach churned as he saw that it was his gold pocket watch. Tears filled his green eyes and rolled down as his cheeks as he not only saw Tess out there like that, but she was also sobbing quietly to herself.

Straining to hear what she was whispering, Andrew’s heart leaped into his throat as he heard her desperate words,

"Baby, please…please tell Tess where you are. We need you, Angel Boy, and I love you so much…"

‘Oh Tess, please help me…Father, please let her find me…’ Andrew’s mind pleaded and even as he was unconscious, another hot tear rolled down his beaten face. Just as he was about to try and get his mind to plead for help from both the Father and Tess, and for Monica’s safety, the images that he had been seeing suddenly disappeared and Andrew once again blacked out and was in total darkness like before.

Chapter 18

"Hello Monica," Adam said softly, his eyes saddened by the distraught angel before him.

"Adam," Monica whispered weakly, her entire being still trembling uncontrollably,

"Please…make him go away. I…I’m not strong enough to resist him right now…I don’t have it in me, especially when he speaks…" Her voice trailed off as she looked away from the one who was such a good friend of Andrews’.

"He speaks what, Monica?" He prodded gently, resting both of his hands on her shaking shoulders.

"The truth," She whispered shakily.

Adam’s eyes filled with sorrow at her words as he glanced back at the demon that stood some distance behind them. He nodded his head as he walked nearer to Philip,

"In the name of God, I command you to leave his angel alone and leave this place." He stated firmly.

Philip chuckled and shook his head,

"For now perhaps," He remarked with a grin,

"But I won’t be far away. She’s weak, Adam, and there is no one to save her soul now." With another laugh, the demon vanished from sight.

Sighing with relief, Adam turned his attention back to Monica, his expression one of deep concern as he wrapped his arm a bit stiffly around her shoulders and steered her to a nearby bench, afraid if she didn’t sit down soon, she may collapse. As he pushed her down gently onto the bench, he knelt down in front of her, trying to meet her dark eyes, but failing miserably.

Adam knew all about what had transpired over the last nine months, as well as the fact that his friend and once fellow Angel of Death was at this moment at the hands of Denise. But he also knew that another angel was being assigned to help Andrew. He had been told to go to Monica and now he longed to help this angel who was Andrew’s dearest friend,

"He’s gone for now, Monica, but it’s up to you to keep him away. I cannot do that for you, I’m afraid."

The young angel was silent for several moments, her head lowered as she tried to stop her hands from shaking,

"Then I’m in a lot of trouble, Adam," She uttered finally.

"How so?" He inquired, wishing she would look at him.

"Because I can’t keep him away either," She whispered,

"He’s with me all the time…even before today. Only it’s worse now…I know what he is and that he knows what happened…between…us…"

"Monica, there is no ‘us’ in regards to this whole thing. It was you, taking a rape for Beth, and that is all…"

"Is that what you think, Adam?" She countered, finally meeting his eyes; her own tinged with anger,

"Do you think that’s all there was to it? Because if that is what you think, then you are wrong! He took part of me away that night…he took my best friend away from me that night…I’m not even worthy to be called an angel of God any longer…not now…"

Her words tore at his heart, knowing that she believed them,

"You have not lost Andrew, Monica and I happen to know that he needs you now…"

"He doesn’t, Adam. He made that more than clear three months ago. I can’t blame him and I still love him, but he just can’t look at me now that he knows the truth about me. I know he’s in trouble, Adam," Tears stung her eyes as she looked away once more,

"I can feel it, but it isn’t me he needs…not now."

"Monica, you know how much he loves you-." Adam argued gently but his heart sank as she shook her head.

"He loved who I was, Adam, not who I am now," She replied softly as she drew in a deep breath,

"But it’s okay, really. I just have to find a way to go on without him is all."

"You are so wrong about this…" Adam whispered, wishing Andrew were here to tell her this himself.

"I don’t think I am, Adam," Monica replied, rising to her feet,

"I have to go."

"Go?" He queried, rising as well to face her,

"Go where?"

"There is just something I feel I need to do," She replied sadly,

"Maybe it’s time for me to stop being afraid. After all, I’ve lost the things that are most important to me."

"Philip will not be far away, Monica," Adam advised worriedly.

"I know that…it’s the one thing I do know," Her dark eyes flickered with sadness before she vanished from his sight.

****

"Rose, where could they be?" Carla uttered, her worry becoming more apparent,

"Andrew is in trouble, Tess went to find him and we haven’t heard from her, Monica still hasn’t shown up…I’m getting really worried."

"I know, honey, so am I," Rose replied, her own voice edged with concern,

"Though I do know that there is evil nearby, as well as far away, but I can’t explain it."

"Evil?" Carla whispered, her green eyes widening,

"As in demons?"

Rose nodded her head and sighed softly,

"Yes, Carla and all the more I know is that neither Andrew nor Monica is safe right now, but that they have been sent help."

"Rose!" Carla cried out, her voice filled with anguish,

"We can’t just sit here and do nothing if they’re in trouble!"

"We aren’t going to do ‘nothing’, Carla," Came the gentle reply, even as tears filled the older angel’s eyes,

"We’re going to pray, honey. It’s the only thing we can do right now."

****

The young Irish angel appeared at the seaport in England after vanishing from Adam’s sight in China, her sad, dark eyes centering on the huge ship that was docked there and would soon be setting sail. She had just purchased her ticket and for a moment, she wondered if she had truly lost the little bit of sanity she had left.

But the fact was that nothing else in her existence seemed within her control any longer. What had happened on board that last ship had started a chain of horrible events, none of which she felt she could do anything about. She was unable to confront Andrew, only wanting to grant him what he had requested of her. She couldn’t come to any kind of resolution as to what had happened with Philip that provided her any peace. At this point she couldn’t even fathom doing the Father’s work any longer, not with the way she felt about herself after what had happened.

Facing her fear of ships seemed the only thing she could and it was the single driving force within her. Maybe because she felt as if she had to do something. Anything.

Of course, she knew Philip would be near, of that she was certain. She could only hope to remain strong enough to resist his offer to fall. Maybe gaining some strength from facing this fear would allow her to do that. Monica didn’t know the answers at this point, she only knew she had to do this one thing.

In her first voyage, the ship had been destroyed; in her second, it was her spirit that had been snuffed out, causing her to lose her best friend and to doubt her relationship with her Creator.

As she forced herself to begin walking up the ramp, she only hoped that this voyage would somehow be better.

Chapter 19

As soon as Monica was safely on the ship and in her new stateroom, the angel who had been trying so hard to hold back her sobs while she had boarded this large boat alone, closed and locked the door tightly behind her and threw herself face down on the small bed. This room wasn’t anything like the one she and her friends had been on just 9 months ago; instead, this one appeared to be more cheap looking, more like a 2nd or 3rd class stateroom. But Monica didn’t care.

‘As long as I’m on board, that’s all that matters now,’ She thought brokenly to herself as she sobbed into her arms,

‘Oh Andrew…please, take care of yourself. I don’t know how much trouble you’re in, but be careful…please…’

Not knowing whether or not her best friend would even care or listen to listen to her even how far apart they were at the moment, both in their friendship and physically, Monica closed her tired, brown eyes and only continued to sob into them…

Just as the ship started to leave the harbor and the Irish angel had now begun the second part of her journey.

But little did she know was that Adam was now standing once again in her room, shaking his head as he looked down at her form, shuddering with sobs. The Angel of Death had been sent to her once again, even after she had left him, and this time he wasn’t supposed to leave her side any time soon. No matter what. ‘Father, she’s fully human now, isn’t she?’ Adam questioned, looking up at the ceiling and awaiting for an answer.

And as it floated down to him softly, Adam sighed and closed his gray eyes, a few tears welling up in them at the thought of how much danger all of his friends were in at the moment. The gray-haired Angel of Death already knew that if Andrew didn’t get help from anyone anytime soon, his friend could most surely die and he would have to be his Angel of Death. But also, he now realized that Philip was more than close by-the words he had spoken to Monica about the demon being near were truer now more than ever.

Philip was also on this ship and Adam knew that the demon of the darkness wouldn’t leave Monica alone until she would agree to come with him to the Dark Side…or just be his for eternity. The only way from him to leave this little Irish angel alone was for her to listen to the Angel of Death and believe what he had to say to her…and just a few hours ago, she was too stubborn to believe anything he had to say about her being wrong about Andrew’s decision many months ago.

‘Oh Father, be with us all,’ Adam pleaded up above as he turned his gray eyes back to the sobbing Monica on the bed. Taking a step closer to her, still in angelic form, he leaned over and gave Andrew’s best friend’s hair a soothing stroke…although he knew that his touch would never meet Andrew’s standards or gentleness. But he continued, hoping it would somehow calm her down and also give himself the strength in the days to come as he watched over her,

‘And please…please…help Monica to see the truth very soon. I don’t want to have to take Andrew Home…’

*****

Two hours later…

After what seemed to be more than eternity on earth, Tess, drenched to the skin and bone from the rain storm, was finally able to make out an extremely large cave off to what seemed to be the end of the woods. Her blurry eyes were barely able to make it out in the rain and darkness around her, but as the older angel rubbed her eyes, her heart leaped with relief as she saw it.

"Is this where he is, Father?" She tried asking once again, but like before, she didn’t receive any answer, which caused Tess to grow more irritated,

"My God, why won’t You ANSWER me!! Is this my punishment, Father, for what I’ve done?!"

Her patience now hanging off of a slim thread, Tess pushed aside any answer she might have received from Him and practically ran towards the opening of the cave as fast as her legs would carry her. As she entered, she leaned her weary body up against the wall and practically slumped down to the ground. She was wet, dirty, exhausted and more worried out of her mind than ever before for her "Angel Boy". And although she wished that Monica was somewhere nearby, she knew that no matter where she was, her "Angel Girl" was taking care of herself and she hoped with all of her heart that an angel was sent to be with her during this time…which was more than she could say for Andrew, who she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt was in deep trouble at this very moment. After she had reminisced those past memories of her time with her young friend many hours ago, and had lifted up a desperate plea for Andrew to tell her where he was, Tess had seemed to suddenly hear a call to her heart from the blonde Search and Rescue angel for help…a pleading cry for help.

But the cry from him didn’t tell her where he was, which caused Tess’ heart to shatter even more than it already was. No matter how many times she had heard pleas and cries from her precious "Angel Babies" they always seemed to tear a new hole into her heart and made her want to sob.

And now that she wasn’t getting any help-or so she thought-from the Father, the angel had decided to follow her friend’s cry to her heart and listen to the pulling to keep walking…until she had come here.

‘Now where?’ She thought to herself as tears streamed down her cheeks, looking right and left and into the darkened cave,

‘Andrew, are you in here, baby?’

But this time, she didn’t hear anything from him, much to her horror. Sucking in a deep breath, Tess pulled her soaking jacket tighter around her body and took a shaky step in her right direction that led to the mouth of the cave and farther into the darkness. Not sure what else to do, Tess opened her mouth and shouted out, her voice echoing,

"Andrew?!"

*****

Andrew was drifting in and out of consciousness, but just as he felt ready to give up for good, he heard the echoing voice of Tess and his heart leaped into his throat at the sound of her voice and he wished that he was able to talk or even open his mouth, to reply to her cry to him. But that was still impossible right now, as the drug that Philip had given him earlier still hadn’t worn off yet and he was as immobile as ever. Forcing himself to stay conscious, however, the angel in complete human form listened as Denise’s voice echoed in his ear which caused Andrew to listen more to the dark angel’s voice rather than Tess’.

"Crap, there’s that Tess angel coming to your rescue," She hissed close to his ear and Andrew sensed her close to his body,

"We can’t have HER coming to you now, can we, sugar?"

Wishing he could hold back a flood of tears, but soon finding it impossible, Andrew’s heart thudded as he felt Denise lift up his unmoving body with a strength he never knew the demon had in her and started to carry him farther into the darkness…and further away from Tess’ loving voice.

Chapter 20

Adam sighed softly as he followed Monica back to her room later that evening. If the distraught Irish angel had any idea she had an angelic companion, she gave no recognition of it, as she didn’t once speak to him. He didn’t know if she was simply too upset and mentally unstable at this point to know he was there, or if she resented the intrusion into her misery, but either way, silence prevailed.

Sadly, he watched as she lay down on her bed, her eyes once again welling up with tears as she wrapped her arms around her pillow. He knew she was lost, with not turning to God and with not having Andrew near her at this time when she needed him so, but Adam knew Andrew was fighting a battle as well. He was trying to wait for the right moment to try to speak with her again, a moment when perhaps she would hear what it was he needed to say and maybe even accept it as the truth, but he didn’t know where that moment was.

Sighing once again, he wished with all his heart that Andrew were the one here for her. The Angel of Death knew that Andrew had a way with her no other angel did; a way of loving her and comforting her where no words were even necessary. Adam knew the incredible bond his two friends shared and it tore at his heart to see this intentional separation between them at the moment. A separation that could very well be toxic for them both.

He watched as the younger angel cried herself into a restless sleep, her slight body still trembling. Suddenly feeling a presence, Adam glanced sharply down at the foot of the bed to see Philip standing there, a satisfied smile on his face. Rising to his feet, Adam sat down on the edge of the bed, beside the angel who was whimpering softly in her sleep, determined that no more harm come to her. If he had to stand in for Andrew, then he would do it to the best of his ability.

****

Denise paced back and forth in frustration, knowing that her time was running out. She knew that Tess would find Andrew and that she was no match for an angel of Tess’ experience and stature. Looking down at her hostage, she could see that he was once again awake and a thought began to form in her mind.

If she couldn’t turn him, then she could certainly destroy him.

"Did you have a nice sleep, sugar?" She crooned, before shaking her head in mock sadness,

"You know, Andrew, it really is a shame that you made such a mess of things. You may not have meant to do it intentionally, but I’m afraid the damage is irreversible at this point," Knowing he had no idea what it was she was speaking of, she continued in the same disheartened voice,

"You remember a few months back when you told Monica the two of you needed to go your separate ways? Now, you and I know the real reason you suggested that, but I’m afraid Monica didn’t take it that way at all. You see, since Philip raped her, she hasn’t felt all that worthy of your love and affection anyway and I know that Tess told you Monica thought you wanted this separation because you were ashamed of her," She sighed softly, and shook her head once again, noting his distressed expression,

"Well, I just got news from Philip, Andrew. It seems that your little friend has completely turned her back on God, no longer finding herself worthy of His love, as she isn’t even worthy of yours. She has agreed to give herself to Philip for the rest of eternity. That’s right, Andrew, now that she isn’t so pure and sweet anymore, she has turned away at long last, just as I always thought she would."

Andrew found himself barely able to breath at her words. Surely they could not be true! He knew his best friend, and regardless of how badly she may feel, she would never turn away, yet alone agree to be with Philip, who she was terrified of! His distress caused him to try to move and his mind cried out in anger and pain when he still found it to be impossible.

"Yes, Andrew, I’m afraid it is the truth," Denise replied, as if knowing what it was he was thinking,

"And Philip is really quite smitten with her, he has been ever since…well, you know and now she belongs to him."

Hot tears filled his eyes at the thought of his best friend at the mercy of that demon, though he refused to believe that she would willingly go with him. She couldn’t possibly…could she?

"Father, please!" His heart cried out in anguish,

"Please help me!"

****

Tess continued to walk deeper into the cave, unable to shake the feeling that her beloved Angel Boy was here somewhere. She was shivering from the cold, but determination to find her baby forced back the physical discomfort as she pressed onwards. He was here somewhere, and she wouldn’t stop until she found him.

****

Monica awoke with a start and bolted upright in bed, trying to shake the sleep from her eyes and mind, though she only wanted to continue to lose herself in slumber once more. Rubbing at her swollen eyes with her hands, before lowering them once more, she drew in a sharp breath as her eyes came to rest upon Philip, who was standing at the foot of her bed, an almost peaceful smile on his face,

"What do you want from me?!" She cried out, her body shaking once again.

"You know what I want." He replied calmly, his gray eyes meeting hers,

"I want you with me for the rest of eternity, little angel and I’m not leaving until I get what I want."

"I told you ‘no’," She whispered shakily, feeling more and more confused. If she no longer belonged with God, yet didn’t belong with Philip, then where did she belong?

"Ah, your words say ‘no’ Monica, but your heart says ‘yes’. I can see it in your eyes. You know that there is no place in heaven for you now, now that you are, how should I say it? Unclean? You have nowhere to go and no one to care about you. But I care about you, little angel and you know that is the truth. So, we got off on the wrong foot nine months ago…let me make it up to you and you’ll never feel this unbearable loneliness again." He raised an eyebrow, seeing that he had hit a nerve with her,

"Yes, you are lonely, aren’t you?" His voice was gentle, almost tender as he watched her nod her head, even though her confusion was apparent in her dark eyes,

"I’ll never leave you, little angel. You have my word on that."

Adam’s heart pounded loudly in his chest,

"Monica, don’t listen to him! The things he is telling you are lies!"

For the first time, the frightened younger angel looked at Adam and then back at Philip,

"No," She whispered, curling herself up into a tight ball on the bed,

"I’d rather be lonely then to go with you."

"I can wait, little angel," Philip replied gently, crossing his arms in front of him, willing to wait until this angel of God reached her breaking point,

"You take your time, baby girl."

At the sound of the term of affection Andrew so often used, Monica buried her face in her pillow and allowed the tears to come hard once again.

Chapter 21

30 minutes later…

By this time, a half hour later, Denise laid one last final kick upon the beaten human angel and smiled proudly as she saw that he was still unable to move. The dark angel tilted her head to the side and took a step back to survey the scene. Andrew’s face was bruised and beaten and he now lay in a twisted position on the hard floor of the cave, while tears fell from his pain-filled green eyes and rolled down his face, which was slick with blood.

"Still unable to defend yourself, eh, sugar?" Denise mocked as she walked back over to him and towered over his broken body, smirking as his face twisted in utter pain, but he still never cried out,

"Where’s your wonderful God NOW, when it looks like this’ll be your last night on Earth? He’s just letting you be beaten by me and He’s not stopping any of it; where is He, Angel Boy?! Hmmmmmm?"

Drawing back her foot one last time and aiming for his head, the dark angel gave his blonde head, which was matted in blood already, a good kick and backed away again. In her mind, the demon knew that she had won now; there was no turning back and this angel of God was so out of luck this time! She, Philip and her master had won, finally after so many years!

But just as she was about to think that she could celebrate her victory as she saw Andrew’s breathe become shallower and he was losing consciousness again, the voice of Tess once again broke into her mind and she glared in the direction of the mouth of the cave. This was as far as Denise was able to hide Andrew in this cave, so she couldn’t pick him up and move farther away. Glowering to herself and her nostrils flaring with utmost anger that this supervisor was coming to her dear "Angel Boy’s" rescue, Denise was about to think of yet another plan when she heard the evil voice of her master whisper in her ear.

‘You are needed elsewhere at the moment, my pet,’ Satan whispered deviously,

‘You’ve done enough to Andrew and he’ll never make it. It’s time to destroy Monica now, Denise.’

Smirking at the ceiling, the dark angel gave a silent cheer before exchanging one final look at the beaten angel at her feet. Andrew was now out cold and there was nothing that could heal him now. Nothing. Knowing this news, Denise then disappeared in a cloud of smoke from the dark, dreary cave and soon re-appeared where her master had sent her for the rest of her assignment.

*****

Tess felt her adrenaline pumping and she suddenly felt a sudden urge to quicken her pace. Her heart pounded loudly in her chest, so hard that she knew it would burst any minute, and she then knew that she just had to find her friend soon…

"God, help him…" She whispered tearfully to herself as she clenched her hand tightly around the broken pocket watch that was her "Angel Boy’s". Raising her shaking voice once again, Tess called out fearfully, hoping that her friend would be able to hear her,

"Andy, I’m coming!"

*****

Andrew’s mind broke out of slipping into unconsciousness for the millionth time at the sound of his supervisor’s loving, yet frightened, voice. His tear-stained green eyes widened and just the voice was like music to his ears. Almost expecting to hear Denise’s evil voice in his ear, but suddenly not even hearing it at all, Andrew felt his heart race and he almost expected it to be some kind of joke. Was she really gone? Was Tess really here finally?

His heart then leaped into his throat and the beaten, human angel suddenly closed his eyes and tried with everything in him to move, at least a little. But once again, his body was being stubborn and it refused to obey his commands. Finally lifting up one last hopeful prayer of strength and courage to overcome this, Andrew then felt his mouth opening and a quiet croak escaped. Tears poured down his cheeks and onto the hard concrete of the cave floor as he realized that the prayers were working…

His heart continued to race like hundreds of horses and before he knew it, he was able to call out the single word of help to his supervisor,

"Tess…"

*****

Almost feeling like an eternity, Tess finally skidded to a stop as she finally approached the very end of the large cave and her brown eyes came to rest on her "Angel Boy", who was lying helpless on the hard cave floor. Blood was seeping through his clothing and his hair and face was matted with the dark, red liquid and the supervisor angel’s heart broke at this sight. It was unlike anything she had ever seen before…

Tess almost expected her friend to be unconscious, but she was then unable to mistake the sound of her name being called from Andrew’s lips,

"Tess…"

"Oh dear Lord!" She cried out, tears racing down her dark skin as she ran towards her baby and fell to her knees beside of him,

"Andrew, Angel Baby can you hear me?"

"Tess…H-help me…" His voice was cracked and the angel was barely able to hear it, but she was able to make out what it was he was saying and she was determined to do whatever it took to help him. Her eyes skimmed over his broken human body and she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that some bones in his body were broken. But first, she had to get him out of here.

"I’m going to help you, baby," She soothed, reaching out and taking her friend off of the ground, his head resting in her arms,

"Tess is right here and I’m going to help you, Andrew, all right?"

"D-Denise…" She heard him utter and anger unlike anything she had ever felt before shot through her at the mention of the dark angel and she only continued to hold him tighter to herself. Tess stroked his blood-caked hair and laid a gentle kiss on his forehead, but not before feeling her friend go limp in her strong arms.

Sucking in a deep breath and praying to God that she would be able to get him some help before it was too late, Tess closed her eyes and lifted up prayers and pleas of help to the Father. How were they ever going to get out of this cave and back to the cabin? She was barely able to make it here to find him in the first place…

"Father, help us, please…We need you now more than ever, Lord," She whispered tearfully as she kept her eyes closed. Almost as soon as the words escaped her mouth, however, Tess felt her world shift and opening her eyes, shock and relief flowed through her being.

She was still on her knees with Andrew’s now lifeless body in her arms, but instead of being in the dark, wet cave, they were finally back at the cabin. Tears continued to race down Tess’ cheeks as she uttered up a choked up prayer,

"Thank You."

Chapter 22

"Tess!" Carla cried out as the supervisor and a barely recognizable Andrew appeared in the living room,

"Rose, come quick!"

"Help me get him on the couch, baby," Tess instructed shakily,

"Gently though, Angel Child, he’s hurt badly."

With all the care in the world, the two angels were able to get Andrew laid down on the sofa, just as Rose came flying out of the kitchen,

"Oh, sweet baby," She cried out, her anguished eyes coming to rest on her former charge, before her senses kicked in and she took control of the situation,

"Carla, we need blankets from upstairs, both for he and Tess. Tess, you need to get out of those wet clothes, honey," Moving to Tess, she hugged her quickly,

"Thank God, you found him, Tess." She whispered, before she pulled away to dart into the kitchen.

Rose returned a moment later with a basin of water and as she knelt down beside of the unconscious angel, she tenderly began to sponge the dried blood from his bruised and battered face,

"Oh Angel Boy," She sighed softly, her heart heavy with the pain he must be in at this moment.

"I’ve got the blankets, Rose," Carla called out breathlessly as she flew back down the stairs, moving to lay a few of them across Andrew as she noticed the way he was shivering,

"Tess is getting changed…she said that Denise did this…" Her green eyes flashed with anger, remembering the demon that she had once been a victim of herself.

"It looks like her work," Rose remarked dryly, as she continued sponging the Search and Rescue angel’s face, noting the number of cuts and bruises,

"Andrew, honey…you’re safe now, Angel Boy. You’re back with those who love you."

The two angels looked up suddenly as Andrew let out a small moan as he struggled to open his eyes, much to the surprise of his friends, considering the condition his human body was in at the moment.

"Rose…"He uttered weakly, his pain-filled green eyes looking up at her.

"That’s right, honey. I’m right here and so are Tess and Carla," the older angel whispered soothingly.

"Is he awake?" Tess cried out, as she came down the stairs, now dressed in something dry and warmer, as she sat down on the stool next to where Rose was kneeling,

"Angel Boy?" She said softly, reaching for his hand.

"Tess," He managed to say, his voice weak from the pain he was in,

"Tess…I’m sorry…"

"Hush now, baby," Tess scolded gently, holding onto his hand tightly,

"There will time to talk about that later. Right now, baby, you need to rest," She turned puzzled eyes to Carla and Rose as she noticed the way he was just barely able to squeeze her hand.

"If Philip had anything to do with this, Andrew may have been given the same drug Monica and I were given that made us completely immobile for some time," Carla said softly,

"It seems to be starting to wear off though, but it takes a little time."

"Philip…." Andrew whispered, his eyes clouding with tears,

"He’s…he’s a demon…not human…"

The three angel’s eyes widened at his words,

"A demon?" Carla uttered, feeling a little sick as she remembered all that had occurred on that boat nine months ago.

Seeing the tears that were falling from Andrew’s eyes, Rose reached up and lovingly stoked his matted blond hair,

"Calm down, honey. You’re safe now."

"M…Monica…" He managed to say, though it felt as if the room were starting to spin.

"She hasn’t turned up yet, baby," Tess replied gently, her hand still holding his tightly, wishing that the gentle Irish angel were here right now to help her best friend,

"You need to rest, baby, please."

Wearily, Andrew closed his eyes, knowing he could stay awake no longer, but a few more words escaped him just as he slipped back into unconsciousness,

"Monica…please…don’t…"

"What does he mean?" Carla whispered, her eyes filled with concern for both Andrew and her previous supervisor.

"I don’t know, baby," Tess replied worriedly,

"But we know those two share a bond, so it seems to me that something is wrong somewhere."

"I think we’ve known that all along, Tess," Rose sighed worriedly, as she drew the blankets up more snugly around Andrew, before she returned to stroking his hair in a soothing manner.

Reaching for his other hand, Tess frowned as she noticed it was drawn into a tight fist. Gently, she pried his fingers lose, tears filling her eyes, as she took the charm bracelet from him, realizing, he must have been clutching it when the attack first began to take place and then must have held onto it the entire time. Lowering her head, the weary angel lifted up her voice in a soft prayer,

"Father, please heal my sweet Angel Boy and please watch over that baby girl, with whatever it is she is facing right now."

****

"Andrew!" Monica cried out in her sleep, before she awoke with a start, her haunted dark eyes darting around the stateroom. Her heart was pounding loudly in her chest as visions of her friend in terrible pain filled her mind and caused tears to burn in her eyes.

She knew that even if she never saw him again, a part of him would always live inside of her, and though at times she found great comfort in that fact, right now it hurt to know that he was in pain and she could never go to him. He didn’t want her near him, of that she was certain.

Seeing Philip still standing at the foot of her bed, she sighed softly. Though she was still terribly afraid of him, she was getting used to his presence here, maybe because he had been in her tormented mind for months now, ever since that horrible night on the ship.

Wearily, she glanced over at Adam, still seeing him holding vigil beside of her bed and she laid her head back upon her pillow, no longer having the energy nor the desire to face anything more than sleep.

"Adam," She whispered softly,

"Will you do me a favor?"

Surprised that she was even speaking to him, the Angel of Death looked down at her with compassionate gray eyes,

"What, Monica?"

"Will you check on Andrew for me? You can be there and back in a few minutes and I just want to know how he is. Please?" Her brown eyes pleaded with him.

"I’m not supposed to leave you, Monica, not even for a minute," He replied regretfully, wishing he could do what she was asking as he felt she needed whatever hope he could bring her at this point. He knew she was giving up and that scared him.

"I’ll be okay…and you won’t be long. Please Adam, I need to know," She closed her eyes as tears once again slipped to her pillow,

"Please, Adam…"

Hearing the words in his heart from above, that it would be safe for him to go; that another angel would briefly watch over the hurting young angel, he nodded his head,

"I won’t be long, Monica."

"Thank you," She whispered as he vanished from the room and she closed her eyes once more and gave into sleep.

Philip shook his head and then looked up as Denise appeared beside of him,

"What are you doing here?" He asked with a frown.

"I was sent here," She replied, a bit taken back by his attitude towards her. She looked in disgust at the sleeping angel who was once her supervisor and she scowled,

"Why isn’t she begging for mercy, Philip?" She demanded, glaring at him,

"She should be screaming out in pain, but there isn’t a mark on her."

"I want her to come with me willingly," He replied tightly, ignoring her tone of voice,

"I don’t want to have to force her."

"You’re being NICE to her?" She seethed, fury rising up within her.

"I’m being patient, Denise," He countered, turning to face her,

"Something you know nothing about."

"She deserves pain and torment and that is usually what you give to your victims," She snapped, before a realization settled over her and she felt even angrier now,

"Don’t tell me your taken with her? Are you in love with her?" Her eyes glowered with hatred as she looked at the sleeping angel,

"She deserves to be crying out in agony, Philip! Maybe you need a reminder in how it is done!" Furiously, she started to advance on the unsuspecting angel, but Philip stopped her, his fingers digging into her arm.

"You will not touch her, do you hear me, Denise?" He threatened, his tone causing the other demon to draw back in fear,

"She belongs to me and it will be handled my way. Do we have an understanding?" His eyes burned into her own as he watched her nod her head,

"Good, now get out of here!" He snapped, releasing her and watching as she retreated to the door.

As she closed it behind her, her anger was etched into her expression,

"I’ll get you for this, Monica. I swear I will!"

Philip approached the sleeping angel and reached a hand out to touch her cheek,

"Soon, my little angel, soon."

Chapter 23

Adam appeared several moments later in the cozy cabin near the woods and as he stood off to the side, watching as Tess, Rose and Carla sat near the battered, barely recognizable figure of his friend-Monica’s best friend-Andrew. Sadness crept into his heart as he took in the sight. It had been so many years since he had seen his former fellow Angel of Death…since the day Monica had been promoted to supervisor and way before Denise had turned away from the Light and the Father who loved all.

The Angel of Death wrung his hands as he stared down at his friend, wondering how in the world he was going to tell Monica what he had seen just now when he returned to her later. But now, he had to know what had happened to bring his friend to the position he was now in.

Taking a step forward, Adam spoke up,

"How’s he doing?"

Three heads turned towards him surprisingly and Tess was the first one to speak,

"Adam??"

Nodding his head slowly, the younger angel stepped towards them and knelt down beside of the couch and looked at Andrew’s sleeping figure. His face was battered and beaten and despite the soothing gestures from Rose as she tried to wipe the dried blood and heal the cuts, it wasn’t helping much. Adam sighed softly as he watched Tess give the Search and Rescue angel’s hand a gentle squeeze.

"What happened to him, you guys?" He asked softly.

"Denise did this to him, Adam," Rose answered his question as she returned to the task of stroking Andrew’s blood-matted blonde hair lovingly,

"You know who she is, right?"

"Yeah, I do…" He whispered in response, sighing again as he ran his hand over his face and rested his chin in the palm of his hand,

"She was Monica’s first caseworker."

"That’s right, baby," Tess continued, stroking Andrew’s hand with her other hand, while being careful to not hurt him any more than he already was,

"And the man who started all of this-Philip-is not a man, Adam. He’s a demon and he’s the one that started this attack. That evil being then sent Denise obviously to do this to our Angel Boy here, and…well…when he’s able to, I’m sure he’ll tell us more of what did happen. But right now, that’s not even a possibility."

"Monica was worried about him, you guys…" Adam whispered, his gray eyes turning to each of his fellow angels,

"Although she’s far from here, she could tell that something had happened to Andrew here, and that he was hurting. She begged me to go check up on him and the Father agreed…even though Philip is also with her right now." Anger started to churn through him at that demon and also Denise, and an uneasiness started to settle into his heart at the mention of those two and he knew he had to get back to Monica soon…

"Oh dear Father, that demon is with our Angel Girl?" Rose sighed deeply and lowered her head sadly, shaking it,

"God be with her…"

"We know He is, Rose," Adam interrupted her, reaching out and resting a hand on her shoulder,

"But Monica needs to remember that, and she’s far from knowing the truth right now. She still thinks that Andrew thinks of her differently, no matter what I tell her. Nothing is working, but I’m not giving up…"

"Andrew wouldn’t want you to give up, Adam," Carla spoke up, sighing as her gaze never left the battered face of her friend on the couch, who was still sleeping, but his breathing was becoming shallow. Reaching a hand out, she laid it on top of Tess’ that was holding Andrew’s hand and rubbed it,

"And speaking of which…he needs medical attention, you guys. I mean…from the way he’s breathing, it seems like there’s some broken ribs and it’s almost obvious that his wrist is either sprained or broken, too…"

"There’s no way we can get him to a hospital, Angel Child," Tess broke in sadly as she gazed at her "Angel Boy" in front of her, who appeared so helpless,

"We’re practically in the middle of nowhere, babies; but we will take care of him and wait until he wakes up again…" Her strong voice trailed off and she let out a sigh before turning around to face Adam,

"Thank you for coming to check up on him, Angel Boy." Her voice broke as she called him the nickname that she had given to Andrew so many centuries ago,

"And also for giving us news on Monica. Give her our love, especially Andrew’s, all right? And tell her we want her back, wherever she is, and that this boy over here needs her now more than ever…Will you do that for us, for him, Adam? Please?"

"You know I will, Tess," He offered her a weak smile before rising to his feet, preparing to leave,

"Take good care of him, my friends. Those demons are still nearby, closer than we think, and they could attack again." He turned his eyes to his friend who laid unconscious in front of them and tears brimmed in his gray eyes as he spoke,

"And you get well, Andrew, ya hear me?" Laying a hand on top of Tess’, which held tightly yet gently to the other angel’s, he squeezed it lightly before backing away and disappearing from the living room.

*****

Monica stirred in her sleep and rolled over onto her other side, moaning quietly. She had been dreaming off and on for the last several hours, and the only time she had awoken in the past 2 or 3 hours was to plead to Adam to check up on Andrew and make sure he was all right. Feeling a touch to her cheek and the words of someone beside of her, "Soon, little angel, soon," the Irish angel felt herself flinching as she recognized that voice and she bolted up right in bed, now staring into Philip’s eyes.

But much to her dismay and confusion, the demon’s eyes weren’t filled with hatred towards her, but rather a caring look was in those dark eyes. When would he ever give up? She wondered sleepily to herself as she rubbed her tired, brown eyes, hoping that Philip would disappear.

But he didn’t, much to her disgust.

"Good afternoon, sweetheart," Philip winked at her and took a seat beside her bed, reaching for her hand. But Monica pulled away before he could even grasp it and it took everything inside of him to not get angry with her. After all, he wanted her to come willingly no matter how long it took. And getting angry wasn’t the way.

"Please don’t call me that," Monica snapped, keeping her dark eyes turned away from him, her heart hurting at the name that Andrew always called her. Would he ever call her that again? And if so, when? ‘It doesn’t matter…He doesn’t love me anymore, no matter how much I love him with all of my heart. Maybe it would be better if I allowed Philip to call me that instead…’

"I know what you’re thinking, little angel," The demon broke into her thoughts and he watched as the little Irish human angel snapped her head up and stared at him fearfully,

"You’re wondering if maybe your place is, after all, here with me. Right, Monica? You know that’s true-"

"No, it’s not," She interrupted, tears filling her eyes and spilling down her cheeks,

"You’re lying and I’m not coming with you. So what’s the point of you being here in the first place?! You’re wasting your time, Philip!"

"Oh, I don’t think I am," He winked mischievously at her again and laid a hand on her shoulder, feeling her flinch,

"In fact, I want to be here and wait for you to come. I know you will, and Denise knows that eventually you will."

"No!" She screamed, pulling away from the demon and cowering up against the headboard of the bed, finding herself shaking,

"Keep her away from me! You stay away from me, and you stay away from A-Andrew! Don’t hurt us…"

"Oh little angel, Denise has already hurt your friend. My dear, don’t you already know that? She nearly killed him late tonight-"

"No! No, I’m not going to hear this…" Monica whimpered, covering her ears with her hands and shivering uncontrollably while closing her tortured brown eyes,

"Someone help me…someone help me…"

"Get away from her," The deep voice of Adam broke into Monica’s pleas as she continued rocking back and forth. Philip grimaced and he backed away from the Irish angel to find himself face to face with the gray-haired Angel of Death that was Andrew, Monica and Tess’ friend,

"And stay AWAY from her. Do you hear me, Philip?" Adam demanded, his eyes flashing with the utmost anger as he stepped up close to the demon and stared him in the eyes,

"And you tell Denise to keep her little paws away from my friends."

"Fine," Philip shrugged nonchalantly, a smile on his face,

"Have it your way. But this isn’t over. Monica will be mine, I just know it." Ignoring Adam’s glare at him, the demon stepped forward and although he saw her shaking at his very presence, he leaned over and kissed her forehead,

"I’ll be back, Angel Girl. And then the real fun can begin…because I know what your decision will be." And smirking one final time at Adam, he disappeared from the stateroom in a cloud of smoke, leaving the two angels, one in human form and the other in angelic form, alone.

Chapter 24

Adam gave a sigh of relief as Philip vanished from the state room, knowing that he would be back, but at least he had a little time alone with Monica, who was hurting right now almost more than he could bear. On top of that, now he had to add more pain to what she was already carrying. If only he could find a way to reach through the pain to her heart and make her see the truth.

Noticing that she was still trembling violently against the headboard, he cautiously reached out and laid a hand on her shoulder,

"He’s gone for now, Monica," He said softly.

Monica nodded numbly as she began to relax a little bit, though the tension didn’t leave her body,

"Did you see him?" She whispered, her eyes holding the first glimmer of hope he had seen from her,

"Did you see Andrew?"

Adam nodded his head slowly, saying a silent prayer to be able to find the words to tell her,

"Yes, I saw him, Monica."

"He’s okay, right?" She asked, feeling panic beginning to rise up within her at the vagueness of his response,

"Adam…."

Still feeling a bit out of his realm, he reached for her hand, this feeling of offering comfort still a bit foreign to him. Taking her trembling hand into his own, he squeezed it gently,

"It’s too soon to tell yet, Monica. Denise, she beat him up pretty badly. He wasn’t even conscious while I was there. They think he has some broken ribs and a sprained or broken wrist," Seeing the distress that was quickly coming over her already frightened features, he added hurriedly,

"But the Father is taking care of him, Monica, and you know He won’t let anything happen to one of His angels."

"Like what happened to me?" She uttered, her voice catching in a sob.

Her question rendered Adam speechless for a moment, not at all sure of how to respond, but he knew she was slipping through his fingertips and that he’d better come up with something,

"I think that there was a reason that happened to you, Monica. We just don’t know what the reason is yet. They want you back, Monica. They all love you so much and they want you to come back to them. Andrew needs you now, so much…"

"He doesn’t." She replied brokenly, lowering her eyes. The news of how badly he was hurt tore at her heart and though there was nowhere else she longed to be other than with him, she just didn’t see how it was possible,

"You all think he needs me, but if he wasn’t conscious, then he never said it and he made it more then clear a few months ago as to how he felt about me."

Moving closer, the Angel of Death took hold of her upper arms and held them tightly,

"Listen to me now, okay? You saw what you wanted to see that day, because of the way you were feeling. Monica, Andrew’s feelings for you would never have changed because of what Philip did. Surely, you must know him better than that-."

"I thought I did, but I don’t!" Monica cried out, getting up from the bed and out of his reach. Standing, she looked at him, tears coursing down her face even as she struggled to remain as strong as she could,

"The day he found out, he left, Adam. Did you know that? He said he needed time to himself and he left. Yes, he came back, but only for two days before he told me we needed to go our separate ways. He used Tess being hurt as his excuse, and had we discussed it, I’m sure we could have worked something out. I knew he was feeling badly about how he had treated her. He knew I knew that! I know him better than I know myself. But that wasn’t the case at all. There was no discussion. It was him basically telling me he didn’t want to see me anymore or at least anytime soon. He wouldn’t look at me, Adam! He wouldn’t let me touch him! What else am I supposed to think?" She drew in a deep breath, willing herself to calm down,

"I’m not angry with him, I’m not. I love him every bit as much as I always have, but he doesn’t want me around, Adam. I’m not the same angel I was before."

"Then let God heal your heart, Monica," Adam pleaded gently, his eyes filled with tears over all she had just told him.

Sadly, she shook her head,

"I can’t go to Him, Adam. After what happened, I’m not worthy of doing that. On top of that, I asked for this to happen, I just didn’t realize how hard it would be."

"None of us are worthy of His love, Monica, but He gives it just the same. Deep in your heart, you know that," He replied, feeling his heart racing as he knew he was losing valuable ground and quickly.

"I don’t belong with Him anymore," She whispered, feeling herself beginning to tremble once again,

"I don’t know where I belong now. I can’t go to the Father, and Andrew won’t have me…Philip…"

"No!" Adam stated flatly.

"What he did to me still hurts so much," She said, more to herself than to Adam,

"But maybe it would be the best thing I could do for them…Denise and Kathleen, they were my shortcomings…I couldn’t stop them from turning away and ever since then, my friends have gotten hurt. Maybe if I went with him, I could stop it from happening anymore."

"What, Monica, yourself for your friends, is that it? Do you think for one second that they would want that?"

"Adam, listen to me-." She protested.

"No, you listen to me, Monica!" He stated sternly, wondering where this voice of his was coming from, but he couldn’t bear for her to do what it was she was suggesting,

"You do this and you will hurt them far worse than Denise or Kathleen or even Philip ever could! They love you-you are their little Angel Girl, just as you have always been. You’re the one that sees yourself differently now, not them! Do you think what he did to you hasn’t broken their hearts as well? When you hurt, so do they, especially the Father and Andrew. There is nothing either of them wouldn’t do to take this pain away from you, but you’re so busy running away from them that you can’t see that! Your pain has made you blind to it, Monica!"

"Andrew walked away from me!" She cried out, hot tears flooding her dark eyes, though there was nothing she wanted more than to believe his words,

"And he didn’t once look back, Adam, not once."

Adam drew in a deep breath as he lowered his voice,

"You may say that you aren’t angry with him, Monica, and I believe that is true. What I also believe is that he hurt you deeply that day, unintentional as it may have been, he did hurt you, though I don’t for a minute think it had anything to do with what Philip did to you. I believe that you think that though, and that is why he hurt you so badly that you think the only answer is going with Philip."

"I don’t know!" Monica cried out, covering her face with her hands,

"I don’t know anything anymore. Please Adam, I just want to be alone for awhile," She pleaded, as she lowered her hands,

"I just need time to think."

"The last thing you need is to be alone," Adam replied gently even as he saw her pleading look. He sighed softly,

"I’ll be right outside if you need me. I’m not going far."

Monica nodded her head as she watched him walk out the door, before she sank down onto the edge of the bed,

"I don’t know what to do," She whispered aloud, her voice trembling. It was then that she did something she hadn’t done for the last three months,

"Andrew, I…I don’t understand any of this anymore. I don’t understand what happened that day in the woods when you said you wanted us to go our separate ways. I think it was because you think differently of me now, but Andrew…I so want to be wrong about that," Her voice caught in a sob as she struggled to continue,

"I feel so lost and so alone, and Philip is so close right now and he wants me to come with him and I don’t know what to do. Am I no longer worthy to be called an angel or even your friend? If that be the case, what else is there for me to do? I just love you so much and I miss you and I’m sorry this happened to me. I know you’re hurt right now and I’m sorry about that too…I just…I just really wish you were here…" Her voice broke off as she lay down on the bed, once more releasing the tears that refused to end.

***

Rose’s head jerked up from where she sat dozing beside of Andrew’s bed. They had carried him upstairs earlier that evening, after wrapping his chest and wrist, and never once had he regained consciousness. Now, however, he was suddenly restless, his head turning from side to side on the pillow and he murmured in his sleep. Leaning closer, Rose was able to make out the words that her former charge was saying.

"No…no…you’re wrong…Monica…you’re wrong…please, don’t do this…" Andrew voice was weak and choked with tears and just as Rose tried to soothe him, he woke up, his green eyes a combination of pain and panic as he struggled to sit up.

"No honey, you need to stay down," Rose said softly as she stopped him, her eyes concerned over the feverish sweat that beaded his forehead.

"I…I have to go to her…" He pleaded, his words contorted and confused as he tried once again to sit up, only to be stopped by Rose.

"Rose?" Tess’ voice sounded through the darkness and the supervisor was soon on the other side of Andrew’s bed.

"I think he’s delirious, Tess. He’s running a bit of a fever, probably due to the trauma his human body has gone through," Rose explained softly.

"Tess?" Andrew choked out, his eyes searching for her.

"What is it, baby?" Tess replied, taking his hand into her own, while her other hand brushed at his hair.

"I have to go to her…Monica, she needs…me…please, I have to go…" His green eyes pleaded with her as tears raced down his battered and bruised face.

"Hush, baby," Tess whispered soothingly,

"Adam is with Monica, okay? He’ll take care of her until you can again, Angel Boy."

"No, Tess….no…" He uttered weakly, though he was beginning to drift off once more,

She…she needs…help…"

Rose shook her head as Andrew once again fell into a restless sleep,

"He must have been dreaming, the poor thing," She sighed worriedly, before she looked up into Tess’ worried brown eyes,

"Tess?"

"Don’t you bet on that, baby," She replied, tears of great worry in her own eyes,

"I get the feeling that our Angel Girl just spoke to his heart and he heard her loud and clear, despite how he feels physically right now, which only means one thing," She gazed down at Andrew as she continued stroking his hair, before she looked up at Rose once more,

"And that is that Monica is in trouble."

Chapter 25

3 days later…

Monica set down the coffee cup that contained her favorite drink and placed it back on the table in front of her. The human angel was seated at the tiny café on the other side of the ship, trying to at least appear somewhat cheerful again…but now, even the taste of coffee brought back memories of the past and it made her want to gag now. She had avoided Adam the last several days after he had tried to get the supposed truth into her mind and after telling her about Andrew’s injuries, and now although he was standing right beside her in the café, Monica continued to ignore the Angel of Death. She wasn’t in any mood to talk to anyone at the moment, much less an angel that was such a close friend of Andrew’s.

Rising to her feet and ignoring the remaining steaming cup of coffee on the table before her, the Irish angel laid down a few dollars in change on the wooden table and headed towards the door. She knew that Adam was following her out onto the deck, but she only continued to act as if he wasn’t there…and not only just so that she wouldn’t appear to a passerby that she was talking to herself.

Heading at a quickened pace onto the main deck, which was several floors up, Monica fought to get her mind off of the things she was thinking about and to get it focused on the fresh air on the main deck; and even though 9 months ago, she wouldn’t have even looked out at the water without growing nauseous, now she was actually looking forward to it.

Sucking in a deep breath of the fresh air and enjoying the nice feel of the wind blowing through her auburn hair, Monica walked over to the railing and leaned up against it, her elbows on the railing. Glancing around her to see if Adam was anywhere nearby, and finally seeing that he was still standing off to the side, Monica sighed, annoyed, and turned away to the other side. A part of her was almost hoping that Philip was there, too, despite how afraid she was of him. But he would be able to take that pain and fear of being rejected away from her, wouldn’t he?

"I know what you’re thinking, little Angel Girl."

Monica whirled around and, ignoring the glare that Adam was shooting at Philip, met the demon’s eyes and sucked in a shaky breath before whispering,

"What?"

"You now know that I can take that fear away from you if you only come with me, right, Monica?" Philip raised an eyebrow at her and stepped closer to him until he was right in front of her, his eyes looking down at her,

"You know I would want that more than anything, don’t you, my little angel?"

Swallowing hard and forcing back hot tears that started to rise in her throat, the human Irish angel forced herself to meet his dark, demonic eyes,

"Philip-"

"Call me Phil, baby," He interrupted, reaching a hand out and stroking her cheek, smiling as he saw that she didn’t pull away.

"Phil…Right at this moment, I’m nobody’s little angel. Not Andrew’s, not Tess’ and not even God’s-"

"You’ve always got the later part right, Monica," The demon interrupted again, moving his hand until it was stroking her hair.

Exchanging a glance with Adam and seeing him fuming with anger at this demon, but continuing to stand nearby and wait, Monica looked back at Philip and forced herself to not tremble with fear,

"I-I just need time to think about this, Philip. I will let you know in a couple of days, all right?" Hesitantly pulling away from him and her heart pounding loudly in her chest, the angel almost expected to feel the fist of the demon’s coming in contact with her cheek again, but to her surprise and relief, that didn’t happen. He didn’t even yell at her like she had expected him to…

"Take as much time as you need, sweet Angel Girl." Philip watched as the tears finally made their way down Monica’s face and he lifted a hand to wipe them away,

"The choice is all yours, but take your time. I don’t want you to do something you will regret." Smiling at the angel-the angel who now was his heart and soul-he finally backed away from her, but not before saying quietly, but loud enough for Monica to hear,

"I will see you around, baby. You know I’ll see you around."

As soon as he was gone, Adam stormed over to the younger angel and grabbed her by the arms, giving her a firm shake,

"What do you think you’re doing, Monica?!" He snapped, anger, confusion and fear all flowing through him,

"Do you have ANY idea what you’re doing?"

"Yes, actually I do," Monica pulled out of the gray-haired angel’s tight grasp and backed away from him, her long hair trailing behind her as she walked back to the stairs. But she threw one last remark over her shoulder before leaving,

"I know what I’m doing, and I know what I have to do right now, Adam. And this time, you can’t come with me."

*****

The Irish angel paced around her stateroom, lost in her thoughts and confusion, pain and even fear torturing her human body. She ran her shaky hands through her tangled auburn hair and finally, with a shaky breath, she lifted her voice up for the first time to the Father in so long.

"Father, I know what I have to do now…and I know that I’m not worthy enough to be an angel or anyone’s friend, but I’m asking You right now…I need to go to Andrew…and Tess, Carla and Rose. To say goodbye, Father. I-I don’t know what I’m going to do just yet about Philip, but I need to see my friends-my best friend-before I leave for good…"

Almost as soon as the words escaped her mouth, Monica’s world seemed to suddenly come to a complete halt and the next thing she knew, the human angel was standing on the front steps of the familiar looking cabin.

*****

"Monica! Oh Monica, baby, sweet Angel Girl…" Tess wrapped her friend up in her strong arms tearfully and held her like never before for what seemed like an eternity. But she finally pulled away and pulled Monica into the front hall, keeping a grip on her arm,

"Miss Wings, where have you been?" She demanded as she closed the door, but the sternness that was usually visible in the supervisor’s voice wasn’t there this time. All that was there now was fear and confusion.

Before Monica had a chance to respond to the question and explain why she was here for this short time, Carla suddenly entered the living room and she ran down the steps towards Monica,

"Monica!" She cried out, tears racing down her lovely face as she threw her arms around her former supervisor quickly, yet tightly,

"Monica, what are you doing here? And where have you been??"

"I-I have only come for a short time, you two…" She whispered, her voice laced with pain and fatigue,

"Only for a few minutes, actually. Where…where’s Andrew?" Her voice cracked as she mentioned her best friend’s name and she awaited a response from either angel.

"He’s still upstairs resting and Rose is with him, Monica," Tess sadly replied, thinking about her sweet "Angel Boy". He had been resting almost the entire past 3 days, only having woken up a few times from nightmares regarding Monica, Denise and Philip, and now Rose was keeping watch over their friend while he continued to sleep,

"He’s in pretty bad shape, baby…"

"I’m going to see him, but first…I came here today-to say goodbye, Tess…" Monica whispered shakily, avoiding Tess’ brown eyes and Carla’s green ones.

"Goodbye??" Carla and Tess repeated at the same time. Both angel exchanging looks of shock with one another, Tess was the first to yelp.

"And what do you mean you’re ‘coming here today to say goodbye’, Miss Wing?!" She demanded, although she kept her voice lower than intended to not disturb Andrew,

"You’re leaving??"

"I-I don’t know what my decision will be regarding Philip, Tess-"

"You’re not GOING with that creep, Monica, are you?" Carla interrupted, stepping forward and forcing Monica to meet her green eyes that were so identical to Andrew’s, it was scary,

"You know better than this-"

"I don’t know, Carla," Monica uttered sadly, feeling her legs shaking and Tess was about to usher her over to a waiting chair to sit down, but the younger angel refused and continued standing on her shaky feet,

"I don’t know anything anymore…I’ve done lots of thinking and right now-I just need to leave. I don’t know when or if I will come back, and I can’t answer any questions regarding Philip, but I do know that after I see Andrew…"

"Baby girl…" Tess choked out, reaching for her charge and wrapping her up in her arms once again, not wanting to let her go,

"Angel Girl, don’t do this…"

"I have to, Tess," Monica cried, pulling away after a moment,

"I know that none of you will understand this, so that’s why I’m trying to keep this as short as possible. I still love you with all of my heart, and no matter what Andrew said to me that day 3 months ago in the woods…and no matter how much that hurt knowing that he used you, Tess, as an excuse for his true feelings towards me…I still love him so much and I have to show that by bidding him farewell."

Lowering her auburn head, Monica kept her eyes diverted away from her former charge and supervisor as she whispered,

"Excuse me…" And she walked on shaky legs towards the staircase and towards Andrew’s bedroom.

*****

Monica walked up to her friend’s open bedroom door and peered inside, her heart shattering at the site of Andrew lying helpless in the bed and Rose at his side. The older angel was softly singing, although no match to Tess’ singing voice, to their friend and fellow angel, but Andrew never moved. Watching from the doorway, she saw how it appeared he was having some trouble breathing because of the broken ribs and she felt tears race down her face as she barely recognized Andrew’s once handsome face. Bruises were so visible all over, and both eyes sported black and blue bruises. His right wrist up to nearly the elbow was wrapped tightly in bandages and she could even see through her best friend’s clothing as the lay there that his chest was also wrapped in bandages.

She almost turned away from the scene, but Rose’s voice stopped her,

"Monica?"

Knowing that she had to do this, and that she would regret it for the rest of her existence if she didn’t see Andrew, Monica took a deep breath and entered the bedroom, standing near the doorway,

"Hi, Rose…"

"Honey, what made you come back?" She whispered softly as she continued to sit beside of their friend’s bedside and holding his hand with all the love in the world,

"Have you…"

"I’m only here for a little bit, Rose," Monica tearfully responded, walking closer and standing beside of the elderly, red-haired angel while looking down at her dearest friend,

"I-I can’t stay…"

"Honey, you know that he needs you now, don’t you?" Rose questioned, trying to meet her eyes, but failing miserably.

"I’m here to see him now because I know I have to, Rose, and that I would regret it. Plus…plus, I love him way too much-I just love him way too much…" Her voice choked on a sob and she sat down in the empty chair beside the older angel.

"Monica-" Rose started to say, but one look from the little Irish angel beside her quieted her from saying any further. Sighing deeply and sadly, Rose turned back to their bedridden friend and stroked his hair lovingly before rising to her feet and walking over to Monica.

"Well, I hope that you do change your mind and that your mind isn’t completely made up, honey…" She laid a hand gently on the angel’s shoulder and gave it a loving squeeze, awaiting Monica’s reply.

"I don’t know yet, Rose…" She answered finally.

Knowing that there was nothing else she could do at this moment, and that she should leave her alone with her best friend, Rose left the room and closed the door quietly behind her.

As the older angel left the room, leaving Monica alone with a still unconscious Andrew, the younger opened her mouth and was about to say something, but sobs overtook her and they rolled down her pale face like rain. Shaking her head, her hair swinging around her shoulders, the Irish angel broke down into sobs right then and there and laid her arms on the bed. As her shoulders shook with heart-wrenching sobs and her fingers clutched the comforter that was wrapped around Andrew’s legs, Monica didn’t even notice that her best friend had suddenly awakened.

His voice was weak as he said the one word that caused her head to jerk up and look into his pained, green eyes, along with the feather like touch from his broken hand on her own shaking one.

"Monica…?"

Chapter 26

Monica starred into those green eyes that seemed to be able to look into her soul as she struggled to stop the sobs that were keeping her from being able to speak. Her tear-filled eyes once again traveled over his bruised face and she raised a trembling hand and touched his cheek tentatively with her fingertips before she lowered her hand once more.

Andrew watched her, fighting back tears of his own. He was finally awake and didn’t feel all that groggy, though he was still in a lot of pain. But right now, his focus was on the angel before him, the angel who was his best friend and he could clearly sense the confusion and raw hurt that was emulating from her,

"You came back." He stated softly.

"I can’t…stay…" Monica managed to choke out,

"I just came to…to see how you were and to say…good-bye…" The last word came out as no more than a whisper as she gazed down at her hands, which continued to toy with the edge of his blanket.

Fear filled Andrew’s green eyes as he heard her words and he knew he needed to reach her and quickly. Drawing in a deep breath, he gave a low moan at the pain it caused in his ribs, before he spoke,

"I heard you the other night, talking to me…"

"You didn’t answer me," She stated sadly. It wasn’t an accusation, only an observation and she immediately felt badly for saying it,

"I’m sorry…you were in a lot of pain that night…"

"I wanted to be there for you so badly, Monica, but I couldn’t," He uttered softly, watching her nod as if she understood,

"You are wrong about so many things, Angel Girl. That day in the woods…it wasn’t at all what you think it was.."

"Andrew, please," Monica whimpered softly, wiping at her tears, just as new ones replaced them,

"What you were feeling was so obvious. You would have never told me that had my circumstances been different."

"How can you think that, Monica?" He pleaded, tears flooding his eyes.

"Because you’ve never walked away from me before!" She sobbed brokenly,

"You pulled away from me as if you were repulsed by me, Andrew. You couldn’t even look at me…"

"Monica, listen to me, please…" He choked out, her pain almost more than he could bear along with his own.

"No, Andrew, I need you to listen to me, please. I can’t stay, but I don’t know where I’m headed. I just knew I had to see you one more time and to thank you for being my friend for all those years," Monica’s voice trembled as she refused to meet his pain-filled eyes,

"If I had a way to turn back the clock to when we were all on that ship, I would. There is nothing I want more than for that to never have happened, but I’m unable to do that. It just changed so many things and it doesn’t go away…and neither does Philip. He’s the only one I’m worth anything to now. I’m not worthy of God or of your friendship, and there is nothing else left for me here," Shakily she rose to her feet, hoping she had the courage to walk out of here and not look back.

"Monica…" Andrew uttered weakly, the tears making their way down his face, but she was giving him no opportunity to speak.

"No, Andrew, please," She whispered, her shoulders once again shaking with sobs,

"Don’t make this harder than it is already. I’m not who I was a year ago…I don’t even know who I am anymore, but please know this…the one thing I do know is how much I love you, despite everything, even how you feel about me. I could never stop loving you, Andrew…" Longing to wrap her arms around him and never let go, the confused Irish angel instead backed up as she raised trembling hand to her mouth and blew him a kiss. Then before he could say anything further, she turned on her heel and fled, her sobs echoing through his room.

"Monica!" He cried out, his own tears coming hard,

"Wait, Angel Girl! Please!"

But his cries went unanswered and now all the angel could do was weep over all that was lost.

Tess looked up sharply, hearing Monica’s sobs as the young angel flew down the stairs, heading immediately for the door,

"Angel Girl, wait, please!" Tess called out, surprised and relieved when the young angel hesitated. Approaching her sobbing friend slowly, Tess gently rested her hands on Monica’s trembling shoulders as she began to speak softly to her,

"You know, sweetheart, that this is not the answer. I can only begin to understand how badly you’ve been hurting ever since Philip hurt you, and I can see the loneliness in your eyes, baby," Reaching up, she rested her hand against Monica’s tear-streaked cheek,

"Loneliness breeds confusion, Angel Girl, and that is what this is right now. You feel alone and confused and you don’t know which way to turn and the one you see waiting for you is Philip. He’s preying on these feelings you’re having, baby and he knows exactly what he is doing. You can’t see that right now because of how you’re feeling about yourself, but it is the truth, Monica," She watched hopefully as the younger angel’s glassy brown eyes search her own as if looking for the answers she was seeking,

"Stay here with us, Angel Girl, with those that love you and will help you get through this. We all want to, even Andrew, though you don’t believe it. You need to trust me this time, baby."

Monica closed her eyes, the pain tearing through her heart as she struggled to speak,

"I can’t, Tess. There is so much I don’t understand anymore. I don’t understand why Andrew reacted as he did when he first found out, by leaving, and then a few days later in the woods. I don’t understand why if you knew what was going to happen to me on that ship why you…why you were so angry with me all the time. I don’t understand why I can’t feel God’s love anymore," Seeing the hurt in her supervisor’s eyes, Monica flung herself into Tess’ arms for a moment as her sobs came with renewed energy.

"Then stay and lets talk about all those things, sweetheart," Tess pleaded, holding her Angel Girl as tightly as she dared, afraid if she let go, this little angel would slip away for all eternity.

Forcing herself to pull away, Monica shook her head,

"I can’t," She whispered,

"I just can’t, Tess. I love you, but I can’t stay here."

Tears fell from Tess’ eyes as she watched Monica, who was still crying openly, turn away from her and open the door. Without another word, the Irish angel walked out of the cabin, before breaking into a run as she vanished into the night.

"Tess?" Carla called out, her own eyes wide with fear as she saw the door open and the tears falling from Tess’ eyes.

"She’s gone, Angel Child," Tess replied brokenly,

"That sweet little angel is gone."

***

Rose listened through tear-filled eyes as Andrew related the conversation to her through his own tears,

"I need to get better, Rose," He choked out miserably,

"I need to find her before it is too late. She isn’t thinking straight right now and she’s hurting so much. She wouldn’t listen to anything I had to say to her. Oh Father, don’t let her go with Philip, please!"

"He’s in control, honey," Rose replied softly, holding onto his hand tightly,

"And He loves her even more than you do, just as He loves all of us, Andrew. You need to rest, Andrew, if you want to get better, because until then there is nothing you can do but pray for her safety and that she sees the truth."

"I love her, Rose and I know I’ve made terrible mistakes that have hurt her, maybe because I don’t completely understand what this pain feels like that she is feeling, but I never meant to make her think I felt any differently towards her…I could never be so shallow as to think that way!" Fresh tears found their way down his face as he thought about her words,

"I just don’t know how close she is to going with him," Andrew whispered brokenly,

"I don’t know if she is just confused or if she is really considering it."

"She’s really considering it."

The saddened voice of Adam caused both angels to look up and Andrew’s eyes met those of his friend for the first time in many long years.

***

Monica ran until she could run no further. Stopping to rest, she leaned over, placing her hands on her knees as she struggled to catch her breath. Looking back, she could no longer see the light from the cabin and she struggled not to cry once more.

She had promised Philip an answer and she knew she had to get back to the ship, though that was going to take some time. Though she had asked God to bring her here, she knew she could never ask Him to take her back to Philip. Reaching into her pockets, she found them empty and she nodded her head in understanding. She knew if she could get to the ship dock in California, then Philip would take care of getting her back on board and she was actually thankful for the extra time it would take to get there.

She had to have time to think about the hardest decision she would ever make in her existence.

Chapter 27

"Hello, Andrew," Adam greeted his long-time friend in a sad whisper as he took a step closer to him and Rose. His gray eyes met those of the other younger angel and tried to offer Andrew a small smile, but found it difficult.

"Adam?" Andrew’s green eyes widened in surprise and almost fear as he saw his former fellow Angel of Death standing in front of him. It had been over 30 years since he had seen his friend and although he admitted that he had missed Adam a lot over the course of the years, Adam’s words just now caused his heart to jump in his throat. The pain in his chest intensified and he fought to catch his breath as he continued speaking weakly,

"Adam…what are you…"

Sighing softly and standing right beside of where Rose was seated on the bed, holding Andrew’s bad hand ever gently in her own, Adam reached out and laid a hand carefully on his friend’s shoulder,

"I know that this news is hard to take in, Andrew, but what I just said is true. Our friend is really considering going with Philip-"

"No!" Andrew cried out weakly, his heart racing,

"No, Adam…she-she CAN’T! Please, I have to do something…Rose, I have to do something now-"

"Oh no, you’re not, honey," Rose sternly, yet lovingly objected as she placed her hands gently on his shoulders as he tried to sit up once again, and pushed him carefully back down against the pillows,

"You’re not going anywhere right now and Adam will continue to try and help Monica. Right, honey?" She turned to the Angel of Death, as if making sure that what she said was correct.

"Yes, Rose, you’re right," He answered softly, his hand never leaving his old friend’s shoulder,

"But I haven’t been called to be there just yet; so I decided to stop by here…I haven’t seen you in quite a long time, buddy. But I wish it was under different circumstances that we run into one another again…"

"Me, too, Adam," Andrew choked out, the tears racing down at his bruised and scared face at the thought of his dearest friend and the deep trouble she was in. Her words to him had hurt him to the core of his being, but the look on her face hurt him even more and the thought of her even considering to leave with that demon was more than he could bear,

"I know-I know that she doesn’t believe a word I’m saying but…but please tell her that I love her, Adam. Please…"

Reaching for a piece of paper on the bedside table, and a nearby pen, Rose handed them to her former charge and dear friend,

"I’ve got an idea. Why don’t you write it down, sweetheart? I know that she had just left here and that it appeared her mind was made up, but nothing is impossible, Andrew. We can have your friend Adam, here send it to Monica." She suggested and shot a look at Adam.

"I can do that, Rose," The angel nodded his head and the Angel of Death and supervisor helped Andrew sit up slightly on the pillows. After making sure that the position wasn’t hurting him, Rose put the pen in his left hand and set the piece of paper on his lap with a hard book underneath. As he began writing with a shaky hand to the one whom he had called "best friend" for so very long years, Adam stood beside his friend and fellow angel and wrapped a friendly arm around his shoulders as he wrote.

‘Please, Father…’ He prayed silently as he closed his slightly teary, gray eyes,

‘I keep praying that You will heal us all and that Monica will know the truth soon. Because…because I’m getting that feeling that soon-very soon-Monica will have to make her choice. Please help her to make the right one…and heal Andrew, Father God. Monica needs him so much, and he needs her just as much; it’s so hard to see them both hurting like this. They’re both my friends and I pray to You that their friendship with each other will be restored and their relationship with You.’

*****

Several moments after Adam had left their friend’s room with Andrew’s letter to Monica in hand, Rose continued to sit by the human angel’s bedside and she sighed softly while lifting up a quiet prayer to the Father,

‘Oh Lord Jesus, please let Monica to see the truth through that letter very soon…I put my trust in you with all of my friends and I know You know what You’re doing. I love you.’

"Rose?"

Tess’ voice drifted in to the room from the doorway and the oldest angel turned around to face Andrew’s present supervisor, offering Tess a small, sad smile as she did so,

"Yes, honey?"

Gazing down at the now sleeping Andrew, Tess sighed softly as hot tears once again brimmed in her loving, brown eyes. Every time she saw her young charge laid up the way he was, it broke her heart all over again. Turning back to the red-haired Search and Rescue supervisor, she answered,

"Why don’t you take a break, Rose? I’d like to sit with him for a moment if you don’t mind…I think when he wakes up, it’s time…it’s time for the two of us to talk…"

"Of course I don’t mind, Tess," Rose compassionately replied, her eyes full of both concern and love at the same time. Rising to her feet and leaning over the frail form of her friend, the angel laid a small kiss on his bruised forehead while whispering in his ear,

"I love you, Angel Boy. And Tess is right here if you need her; I’ll be back later, Andrew."

Running her hand gently through his tangled, blonde hair, she straightened up and walked over to Tess. Reaching a hand out, she squeezed the slightly younger angel’s shoulder gently and offered her an encouraging smile,

"You’re doing the right thing, Tess. This is the start of healing for all of you, whether you know it or not."

"I do know, baby," She whispered back, her voice choked up as she turned to look at Andrew,

"And I love Andrew too much to not set things right again…just as much as I love Monica…" Her voice broke off at the mention of the little Irish angel and she closed her eyes and shook her head at the memory of Monica’s words and her leaving earlier that afternoon. Her faith in the Father that He was still in control was slowly dwindling away, but she kept forcing herself to remember that He loved Monica more than she and Andrew did put together…even when it didn’t seem like it.

Nodding her head at the other angel and forcing a strong smile for her sake again, Rose gave Tess’ shoulder one last squeeze before departing from the room and closing it softly behind her. After she was gone, Tess headed over to her "Angel Boy’s" bed and sat down in the chair beside of him, looking down at his sleeping body. Although she knew from Andrew’s words the day she had rescued him from Denise’s clutches-"Tess…I’m sorry…"-that he wasn’t angry at her anymore, she also knew that they did have to talk after he awakened.

Suddenly hearing her dear friend let out a soft moan on the bed in front of her, Tess rose to her feet immediately and sat down beside him. Seeing him tossing and turning around in front of her and tears making their way down his cheeks, the older supervisor was able to make out his mumbled words.

"Monica, please…I’m sorry! I’m so sorry…I…I…love you…Mon-No, please, no don’t…!"

"Andrew? Angel Boy, wake up," Tess reached out and with great care and gentleness, shook him by the shoulders to wake him up from this nightmare that was invading his mind once again. Tears sprang to her brown eyes as his own green ones opened wide suddenly and a cry escaped his lips as he shouted out.

"Monica!"

"Hush, baby boy," She soothed, lovingly stroking his blonde locks and forcing him gently back down on the bed, while her eyes never left his,

"It was a dream, Angel Boy."

"No, it wasn’t," He choked out, shaking his head and turning away from her. He drew in a deep breath and tried to calm his racing heart. After having listened to Monica’s words several hours ago, and watching her leave the way she did and then writing that letter to her that expressed his feelings and more to the one who was his best friend in the world, Andrew's mind wouldn’t stop thinking of the events that led up to this time and place. Finally forcing himself to look back at Tess and trying to get his mind off of the nightmare that had evaded his sleep just now, he met her eyes steadily,

"Tess-"

"Andrew-"

The two friends both stopped as they spoke at the same time and she finally heard Andrew whisper brokenly,

"You go first…"

"Andrew…baby, I came in here now because I think it’s time we talked about what had occurred between us over 9 months ago-"

Tears sprang to Andrew’s bloodshot green eyes at that memory and he interrupted her by saying,

"Tess, I’m so sorry about that…"

"Angel Boy, listen to me, all right?" She gently requested and after having seen him nod his head rather reluctantly, she continued,

"Baby, I had no right to treat you and Monica the way I had treated you on that ship, no matter what that reason. Slapping Monica was way out of line and calling you ‘stupid’ was, too, baby. I am sorry, Andrew, and I hope that soon we can all put this behind us…" Her voice trailed off for a moment at that last remark and she lowered her eyes as she thought of her "Angel Girl".

"Tess…I was in the wrong, too…way more than you were…" Andrew whispered sadly, weakly reaching for her hand with his left one,

"I-I blamed you for everything…I practically kicked you out of this cabin not too long ago, and by what I thought…we could be losing Monica as we speak…" His weakened voice broke off on a sob, but he forced himself to continue,

"I-I know that you knew what was going to happen to Monica and Carla, Tess, but I should have known you well enough that it was all done in good intentions. You’ve always been not only my supervisor, but…a friend to me almost since the day of creation, Tess. And I’m so sorry…Please don’t hate me, Tess…"

"Oh Andrew, baby I could never hate you," Tess soothed as tears sprang to her sorrowful, yet hopeful, brown eyes. Seeing the slight doubt in his pained green eyes, Tess reached out for him and for the first time in what seemed like years, she drew him to herself in a warm embrace and gently held him as he sobbed,

"I have never ‘hated you’, Angel Baby. Never. I just want us to be able to work through these problems that we both created over 9 months ago, Andrew. Will you forgive me, honey?"

"Yes," He replied without hesitation as he weakly hugged her back, his face buried against her right shoulder,

"And you…will you forgive me for being so-HATEFUL to you guys?"

"It’s already forgotten, sweet baby," She smiled softly as she gently held in her strong arms and rubbed his back,

"I love you, Angel Boy."

"I love you, too, Tess," He sobbed as he wrapped both arms around his friend rather weakly and didn’t want to let her go any time soon. And while he let out every emotion, Andrew whispered,

"Please forgive me, Father…and be with Monica. We love her too much, and nothing will be the same if she leaves…"

For the first time in what seemed like an eternity, the Father’s love floated down to his heart and he suddenly felt a peace fill him that he hadn’t felt in so long. A peace not only within himself, but also for Monica, too. The Father’s Voice suddenly drifted to his heart that he had done the correct thing with writing that letter to his best friend and that God the Father would take care of her the rest of her journey, just like He always had.

Gently pulling away from his supervisor and looking down at himself in surprise and awe, both Andrew and Tess noticed that the scars, bruises and pain on his face, lower body and arm were now gone and replaced with how he used to look. A tearful smile spread across his face and as he lifted his green eyes to the ceiling, he whispered again through tears,

"Thank You, Father…"

Looking back up at Tess, who still sat beside of him, amazed and yet happy at what had just occurred, Andrew sat up all the way and threw his arms around his supervisor and friend tightly, hugging her with all of his strength,

"Thank you, Tess."

Chapter 28

Monica walked exhaustedly the last few blocks to the seaport in San Diego, never having felt quite so tired in her life. Thankfully, she had been able to hitchhike rides for most of the nearly 1000 mile journey, but she hadn’t felt safe enough with any of the drivers who had picked her up to be able to sleep. The exhaustion added to the misery she had felt ever since leaving the cabin two days ago and her friends…one of them her best friend.

Feeling tears welling up in her tired eyes once more, she pushed them back as she saw the ship coming into view and she swallowed hard, wondering what she was going to tell Philip. She had been unable to come to any resolution on her journey and she felt more confused then ever before. Having always been of God, it was nearly impossible for her to comprehend being anything but, yet she didn’t feel worthy after what Philip had stripped away from her. If even her best friend was unable to overlook what had happened to her, how on earth could her Heavenly Father?

"Monica?"

Startled, the Irish angel turned to see Adam standing beside of her and she sighed softly,

"Not now, Adam, please," She whispered brokenly.

"I’m only here for a minute, Monica," He explained softly, his eyes taking in her gentle face, which was filled with hurt and fatigue,

"I have two things to give to you and it is up to you what you do with them."

Monica watched as he first handed her a boarding pass for the ship and her hand began to tremble as she took it from him, before looking at him questionably. Without a word, she accepted the envelope he offered next, her dark eyes filled with confusion.

"I suggest you read that before you board, Monica," Adam advised her before he reached out and laid a hand on her shoulder,

"The choice is yours, Monica, you know that, but if you make the choice to go, know that no one else wants that but you." He decided against saying more, not wanting to confuse things anymore for her, and he was hoping and praying that Andrew’s letter would say all he wanted to and more.

Before Monica could think of anything to say, Adam was gone and she was left looking at the ticket and the envelope in her hand. Seeing a bench nearby, the weary angel moved to it and sat down, taking in a deep breath before she tore open the envelope. It only took her a moment to recognize Andrew’s handwriting and tears instantly filled her eyes as she began to read.

Monica,

You didn’t give me much of an opportunity to say anything this afternoon when you came to say good-bye, so I’m writing this letter to you to hopefully make you understand some things.

Baby girl, I cannot begin to fathom how what Philip did to you has made you feel. I wanted so much to help you through this, but because of my own guilt over all that had happened with Tess, I managed to hurt you even more than you were already hurting. I knew deep down inside that one night of tears was not all it would take for you to heal from what he did, but at the time I couldn’t see that. I was having trouble seeing past my own guilt, I guess.

When Tess first told me what you thought-that I saw you differently now, I couldn’t imagine how you could have thought such a thing. But once I had thought about it, it became so clear to me. Angel Girl, I am so sorry. There are no words to express just how sorry I am that I made you to feel that way, to have you doubt even for a minute, my feelings for you. Monica, they have not changed at all. I thought I had made that clear before, but then I contradicted every word I told you in the woods that day. I couldn’t look at you, baby, because it was tearing me apart to even suggest this. The last thing I wanted was any kind of separation from my best friend, but at the time I could see no other way. I wanted Tess to feel special, and overlooked that in the way I was attempting to do that, I was making you feel terrible and making you feel that you were less than what you are.

Sweetheart, I love you. You are my soul mate, remember? What I want more than anything is to help you through this, but you have to choose to not go with Philip in order for that to happen. Let me be there for you, baby girl, please?

I told you at the cabin, when we were both given that week off to spend together, something that is so true and that I want you to remember now. I told you "I love you, sweetheart, and there is nothing on this Earth strong enough to tear that love from me" and that includes anything Philip did to you. What he did to you was horrible, but it makes me love you even more if that were possible. It took so much courage, Monica, to do what you did in order to save Beth, and so much love. You may not see those two things in yourself right now, but I do, and so does the Father. Give us a chance to work this out together, baby, please. I know we can, and deep down inside, you do too.

All my love,

Andrew"

As she read the last paragraph, tears splashed onto the paper, and once she had finished, she lowered her auburn head and wept, holding the letter, as if it were a lifeline, close to her heart. Though it was hard for her to believe all the things Andrew had said in the letter, mostly the things about herself, she knew he had never lied to her, and he certainly wouldn’t start now.

Looking down at her boarding pass, she knew what she had to do as she rose shakily, folding the letter carefully and putting it in the pocket of her skirt. Gazing ahead at the giant ship before her, she began walking towards it, an apprehensive expression on her tired face. It was nearly sunset and she knew the ship would be setting sail within minutes, so she managed to quicken her pace.

Once she had boarded and found her stateroom, she waited, knowing beyond the shadow of a doubt that he would show up. Though exhausted, she paced back and forth in the small space, only wanting to get this over and done with. Though she was terribly frightened, she was hanging onto the hope that came in the form of that letter.

Just as the sun set upon the ocean, Monica became aware of the fact that she was no longer alone and turning around, she came face to face with Philip.

"Good evening, little angel," He said softly, barely able to conceal the desire he felt for her after not seeing her for the last few days.

"Philip," She nodded cordially to him, as she tried to will her hands to stop shaking. Crossing her arms in front of her, trying to appear calmer than she felt, she met her eyes with his and waited for the question that she knew would come.

"I trust you have made a decision, my angel," Philip continued, taking a few steps closer to her and reaching out to touch her face. He felt anger well up inside of him as she flinched, but he held it back as he awaited her response.

"Yes," She replied softly, lifting her chin in an effort to appear strong,

"As a matter of fact, I have. Just a few minutes ago to be exact."

He smiled, and Monica couldn’t believe that she had almost found comfort a few days ago in that smile that contained so much evil. She knew now that this demon who had hurt her so badly all those months ago was not a friend, even though he had tried to put himself in that position and had nearly had her fooled.

"Well, then lets hear it, angel," He encouraged her softly, taking yet another step closer to her.

Monica swallowed hard as she found her voice,

"I’m not coming with you, Philip." She stated simply, deciding that the reasons for that decision were really none of his business.

Philip’s dark eyes narrowed as he crossed his arms in front of him and surveyed the angel that stood before him,

"I’m sorry, maybe I misunderstood."

"I can assure you that you didn’t. I said I was not coming with you," She repeated as steadily as she could.

"Ah, I see," He replied, his eyes never leaving her as he saw the fear beginning to rise up within her,

"I think there is something you don’t understand, Angel Girl. The question was never whether or not you belonged to me, but rather whether or not you came of your own free will or by my taking you. It seems you have left me with no choice now."

Monica barely had time to think about fleeing, before Philip with all a demon’s strength and quickness had grabbed hold of her and had forced her down on the bed. The human angel struggled desperately, though she was no match for his strength, so instead she opened her mouth and screamed, but was rewarded with a blow to the face for the effort and for a minute, all she could see was white light from the force of the blow.

"Shut up," He hissed, yanking a cloth from his pocket and stuffing it into her mouth to keep her quiet.

Despite the pain and fear, Monica continued to fight with every ounce of energy that was left within her, knowing what it was he meant to do to her once again, only this time there was no Beth to save. Hot tears filled her brown eyes as a rope appeared from nowhere and she felt him bind her wrists above her head, tying the other end to the headboard.

"I remember now, little angel," Philip seethed, making sure the ropes were tight around her wrists, despite the fact that they were tearing into her flesh,

"You like things a bit on the wild side. I’m sorry it had to come to this, my angel; it could have been so much nicer if you would just cooperate. I don’t even see why it is you are struggling so, don’t you know by now that you are worth nothing?"

Silent sobs shook her small frame, and her breathes came in rapid gasps to the point that she felt as if she may suffocate through the gag in her mouth. She didn’t see how she could possibly endure this shame and humiliation again and she was sure if it happened, the little bit of sanity she felt as if she had left would surely be gone.

Closing her eyes as tears made their way down to the bedspread, she offered up her plea in one final attempt to stop this from happening to her yet again.

"Father…please help me! Send me help, please…I can’t do this again…I can’t," After crying out to the Father in her heart, she gave one more silent cry to the one she prayed could still hear her,

"Andrew! Help me! Don’t let this happen again…please don’t let this happen again…"

Chapter 29

"…I hope that she’s all right now," Andrew was saying as he sat on the couch beside of Carla and gazed at the flickering orange flames of the fire in the fireplace before them. Turning to look at Rose and Tess, he lifted an eyebrow,

"I haven’t heard Word yet from the Father to go to her, but I’m getting that feeling right now…"

"Feeling?" Rose and Carla repeated at the same time, both angels looking at their friend and fellow angel. Exchanging looks between each other, Rose spoke up,

"You mean that connection, honey, that you two share between one another, and can just about hear each other’s thoughts?"

"Yes, that’s it exactly…" Andrew lowered his voice and his eyes as if he was hearing something only he could hear. A moment later, his green eyes widened as he heard the unmistakable voice of his best friend…only this time, it was pleading for him:

"Andrew! Help me! Don’t let this happen again…please, don’t let this happen again…"

"Monica…" He whispered as his eyes grew wider as the realization came to him what was happening and he quickly shot to his feet, surprising his friends,

"Oh God, Monica…"

"What is it, Angel Boy?" Tess’ voice held an urgency in it as she gazed fearfully at her friend, waiting for his answer.

"She just told Philip ‘no’…and now he’s about to-about to…" His voice trailed off suddenly as he then heard yet another recognizable voice, only this one was the Voice of the Father,

"Go to her, My angel. She needs you more than ever, and I will be with you the entire way. Hurry, though."

"I have to go to her!" He cried out, making a mad dash for the door to grab his jacket,

"The Father has told me to get to her and to help her; Philip is about to rape her again!"

"Oh sweet Jesus!" Rose cried out and the remaining three angels rose to their feet as Andrew shrugged sloppily into his jacket, not bothering to button it up. Practically running towards him, Rose placed her hands against her former charge’s face and turned his head to face her eyes,

"Honey, I am ordering you this minute to be CAREFUL this time, all right?"

"Trust me, Rose, I have this feeling that by the time this day is over with, Philip will not want to mess with us again…and same goes for Denise," He replied firmly, reaching up and taking her hands away from his face, but giving them a tight squeeze before releasing them,

"I’ll be back, all right?"

"Then go and get our Angel Girl, baby," Tess stepped forward and wrapped him in a quick hug before releasing him and shooing him out the door. As Andrew stepped out into the cold air, he lifted his face to the afternoon blue sky and whispered shakily,

"Okay, Father, show me the way."

*****

Philip laid on top of the whimpering, struggling Irish angel and continued to prepare to take away whatever innocence that was left in her frail body. Feeling Monica start to struggle away from him even further and just as she was about to roll off to the side in the other direction, Philip raised the palm of his hand and laid one on her face. Hard.

Smirking at the whimpering coming from underneath her gag over her mouth, the demon took off his shirt and then prepared to rip open the front of her blouse.

"You listen to me, and you listen good, little angel," He hissed at her, looking deep into her almost soulless brown eyes,

"You are not to make a PEEP and I will let you live through this. Have I made myself clear, Monica?" Still seeing the fear and disgust radiate from her already bruised face, Philip answered his own question,

"Good. Not just relax." At that last statement, he let out one of his demonic laughs that seemed to shake the entire stateroom.

*****

Andrew, now in total angelic form, practically ran through the ship the Father had told him that Monica was in. Usually when he was on assignment in Search and Rescue, he wouldn’t be running down halls like he was now, except if a child was walking in front of a speeding car and was about to be hit, that is. Now, however, the angel was running as fast as his legs would carry him to the stateroom God had told him Monica and Philip were in…

The stateroom in which Philip was about to rape his dearest friend all over again.

"Monica, hold on, baby girl!" He whispered to himself, hoping that in spite of everything that had happened between them, and all that had occurred the last 9 months, Monica would still be able to hear his words to her,

"Please, Mon, I’m coming…I’m coming…"

Almost as soon as those pleas escaped his mouth, he soon found himself at the directed room where his best friend was behind. Not wasting any more time, Andrew walked through the door without opening it and sucked in a sharp breath as he saw Monica laying flat on her back on the bed and Philip right on top of her. He saw the little Irish angel struggling with little strength she had left in her body, but the demon on top of her only continued to slap her across the face and order her to "shut up, or else". Neither of them noticed his angelic presence, which was all the more better for Andrew.

Without thinking a second further, he ran towards them and threw his body right on top of Monica’s. Knowing that nothing could happen to him since he was in angelic form, Andrew however couldn’t stop his heart from pounding loudly in his chest, hoping with everything in him that the nightmare that had started almost a year ago, would end today.

Looking out of the corner of his green eyes and seeing Philip step back as it appeared that he saw the Search and Rescue angel right on top of his intended victim, Andrew continued to lay on top of his best friend’s frail body and hold tightly to her.

"Well, well, well, if it isn’t Andrew here to save the day?" He smirked at them, wiping a hand across his dark features,

"Don’t you realize that you’ll never get her back? Don’t you realize, ANGEL BOY, that you’re wasting your time AND your energy? She’s mine now, whether you know it or not."

"That’s where you’re wrong, Philip," Andrew seethed, trying to keep his anger towards this demon in check, never moving from his spot,

"You are so wrong about that…She told you ‘no’, and that’s what she means. She belongs to God, just like she always had-"

"Shut up, you stupid angel!" Philip snapped angrily, his dark eyes blazing fire at Andrew and Monica,

"You and your GOD are no match to me! Now get off of her, or I will FORCE you off!"

"Never." Andrew kept a stubborn look on his face as he faced this being that was still intent on getting Monica’s soul, along with her innocence,

"I think you know that."

Philip growled angrily and was just about to hurl himself towards Andrew, and a still shaking Monica, but what stopped him was a blaze of white light surrounding the two angels and a host of angelic beings sent from God Himself, stood before Andrew and Monica, hovering over them. Andrew felt tears welling up in his green eyes again as he saw Adam step forward and face Philip dead on.

"In the name of Jesus Christ, GET OUT," He ordered, not recognizing his own voice as it thundered loudly to the ugly demon,

"And STAY out."

Philip shielded his face from the bright light of God and all of the beautiful angels, and knowing that he was defeated and that he had lost for good, he let out a loud growl and disappeared from the small stateroom. As he finally left, so did the other angels that had surrounded Andrew and Monica, except for Adam.

The Angel of Death stepped towards his two friends and saw Andrew untying Monica’s hands from the headboard and was trying to bring her around. Adam laid a hand on his friend’s shoulder as he worked on the youngest angel and whispered,

"Are you two okay?"

Seeing that his friend and soul mate was finally coming around again, Andrew nodded his head and shot a quick glance at his once fellow Angel of Death. Turning around briefly, he shot his friend a grateful look as he wrapped his arms around him and hugged him quickly,

"Thank you, Adam. For being with her during that time and for helping right now…"

"Any time, pal," Adam smiled as he hugged his friend back before the two angels released each other,

"I better get going. I’ll see ya later, okay, Andrew?"

Smiling in return, Andrew nodded and Adam disappeared from the room, leaving the blonde angel alone with his best friend. Kneeling down beside of the one who had his heart and soul, Andrew whispered softly,

"Angel Girl?"

Hearing the soothing voice that she thought she never would hear again, Monica finally opened her eyes and drew in a shaky breath as she came face to face with Andrew. Her hands trembled as she tried to close up her ripped blouse and she sat up, causing Andrew to rise to his feet as well and sit down beside her on the bed.

"A-Andrew?" She uttered tearfully, not believing her eyes that he was right here.

"Yes, sweetie, it’s me. I’m here, Monica, I’m right here," He choked out through tears and the next thing he knew, he saw his friend break down into hysterical sobs. Andrew reached for her and Monica, though hysterical in hurting at the moment, threw her arms around her best friend and held onto him tightly, never wanting to let him go ever again.

Chapter 30

Andrew held onto his friend’s shaking form as tightly as he dared as the sobs shook through her slight body and her tears dampened the front of his shirt where her face was pressed. He knew that although Philip had not succeeded in destroying her tonight, he had managed to tear open the old wounds of 9 months ago that had never really healed properly to begin with. But even now, with her trembling and crying as if her heart would break in his arms, he knew that if the Father had plans for her with these types of cases, He couldn’t have a chosen a better angel. Andrew knew Monica wasn’t ready to hear the reasons yet, maybe not for awhile, so Andrew just held her, his chin resting against the top of her head as he rocked her gently,

"You’re safe now, baby girl and he won’t be hurting you again," He whispered as his hands ran through her tangled hair. Gazing down at her, he noticed that her wrists were bleeding a bit from where the ropes had been tied far too tightly and he knew they needed attention. Gently pulling away, he noticed a pair of pajamas lying on the chair and he silently thanked the Father,

"Sweetheart, I’m going into the bathroom to find something to bandage your wrists, okay?" He touched her bruised cheek gently, growing a bit concerned that other than saying his name the one time, she remained silent, other than her sobs,

"Why don’t you change clothes and then come in when you are ready, all right?" Seeing her uncertainty and fear, he kissed her forehead,

"I’m right here, baby. I’m not going anywhere and I’m keeping that promise, okay?" Seeing her nod slightly, he went into the other room and immediately found gauze and medical tape on the counter and nearly broke down at how the Father always provided for them,

"She’ll find her way back to you, Father. I know she will," He whispered, trying to fight back tears over how deeply hurt his best friend was at the moment. He remembered the things she had told him about when she had saved Beth; how her heart hurt so badly and how she just couldn’t comprehend this having happened. And that time it had been her choice. Tonight had not been of her choosing, and though it hadn’t happened, the emotions; the fear, shame and feeling of violation had to have been present and his heart ached for his gentle friend.

He looked up as he saw her enter the room, now having changed into the pajamas that had been provided. He patted the countertop with his hand and then helped her to hop up as she had yet to stop shaking. With all the love in the world, he cleaned the wounds on her wrists and bandaged them, all the while speaking softly to her. When he had finished, his hand gently went back to her bruised face, stroking it softly as he looked into her dark eyes which seemed void of emotion, save two, deep sadness and utter exhaustion.

"Angel Girl," He began, but before he could begin his thought, she had leaned her head up against his chest as fresh tears flowed through her being. Feeling helpless to calm her, Andrew carefully lifted her into his arms and carried her back into the main room, but as he was about to sit her down on the bed, she clung to him desperately and finally found her voice,

"No, Andrew…please no…I don’t want to be here…I feel him everywhere, please…"

Realization hit him as she buried her face against the nape of his neck, sobbing brokenly. Looking up at the ceiling, as tears made their way down his own face, he uttered up one word, so desperate to help his friend,

"Father?"

In the time it took him to say the word, Andrew found himself, with Monica still in his arms, in the living room of the ever-welcoming cabin.

"Babies!" Tess cried out, relief on her face as she saw them appear. Approaching them, she laid a hand on Andrew’s arm,

"Thank God, babies," With her other hand, she reached up to stroke Monica’s hair, though the young angel was still huddled as close to Andrew as she could get,

"Angel Boy, is she okay? Philip didn’t…"

"No on both accounts, Tess," He said softly, holding his dearest friend tightly,

"I can’t say she is all right yet, but no, I got there in time, thanks to the Father. Philip did hurt her, but…not like that."

"Get her up to bed, baby. It’s late and Rose and Carla went to try to sleep. I’ll let them know you are both back," Reaching up, she gave Andrew a kiss on the cheek,

"Thank you for bringing her back to us, Angel Boy," She whispered softly, before giving Monica’s head a gentle kiss as well and adding for her,

"We’re here for you, sweet baby girl, as long as it takes."

"I’m putting her in the spare bed in my room tonight, Tess," He added as he headed for the stairs,

"I want to be close to her and it may be a long night…"

***

Andrew sat down on the bed nearest to the window, Monica still in his arms and still weeping softly. Wrapping a quilt around her trembling form, he sighed softly,

"Oh Monica, I hate to see you hurting like this and I wish I could take it all away, but I can’t. I love you so much, sweetheart, and nothing changes that fact. You have a piece of my heart, little one, and I never want it back."

Still not receiving an answer, though she tightened her arms around him, he laid back against the pillows, noticing that the radio was on and playing softly. Hearing a new song begin and one he had heard before somewhere, he felt tears fill his eyes once more, as he softly sang along as his hands continued to stroke her hair, both in an effort to soothe her.

"I’ll be your candle on the water,

my love for you will always burn.

I know you’re lost and drifting,

But the clouds are lifting.

Don’t give up, you have somewhere to turn.

I’ll be your candle on the water,

Till every wave is warm and bright.

My soul is there beside you,

Let this candle guide you.

Soon you’ll see a golden stream of light.

A cold and friendless tide has found you.

Don’t let the stormy darkness pull you down.

I’ll paint a ray of hope around you,

Circling in the air, lighted by a prayer.

I’ll be your candle on the water.

This flame inside of me will glow.

Keep holding on, you’ll make it.

Here’s my hand, so take it.

Look for me reaching out to show

As sure as rivers flow…

I’ll never let you go.

I’ll never let you go.

I’ll never let you go."

As the song ended, Andrew realized that she had cried herself to sleep, exhaustion finally taking over. Gently, he kissed the top of her head as he whispered,

"I’ll never let you go, Angel Girl."

Though the song and Andrew’s singing had finally lulled her off to sleep, her body drained of all energy; it was Philip’s voice she heard as she entered into dreams….

"Don’t you know you are worth NOTHING?"

Chapter 31

"You’re worth nothing…worth nothing…worth nothing…nothing…"

"Monica, sweetheart? Angel Girl, wake up," The sound of a voice jolted the angel out of her restless sleep and her eyes flew open, now staring up at the ceiling in Andrew’s room. Bolting straight up in bed, Monica nearly knocked Tess over as she found herself back in the present and not with Philip anymore. Her best friend had saved her last night and for that she was eternally grateful, but still…

"Monica, are you all right, baby? It’s past noon and we heard you talking in your sleep," Tess soothed, taking her charge’s hand in her own and giving it a loving squeeze,

"Baby?"

"Where…where’s Andrew?" The younger angel stuttered, trying to meet Tess’ eyes, but after they met with her supervisor’s she looked down once again in misery,

"I need to-talk to him, Tess…Please…"

Concern flooded Tess’ being and some more fear, too. Andrew had told her after they had returned that she wasn’t all right, but Tess was more than determined to make her "Angel Girl" all right again, no matter what it took. Giving her friend’s hand another squeeze, the older angel stood up from where she sat on the bed and smiled reassuringly down at Monica.

"Of course, Angel Girl. I’ll be right back with him."

After Tess had left the room, Monica laid back down on her pillows and curled herself up into a ball. Sobs now started to shake through her again which caused her entire body to tremble. Although it was only seconds later, to Monica however it seemed like hours, Andrew then appeared in the bedroom, and at the sight of his best friend curled up in a tight ball in the spare bed in his room, the blonde angel bolted towards her like a rocket and knelt down beside of the bed and laid his hand on top of her head soothingly.

"Angel Girl?" He whispered, stroking her hair as she sobbed into her pillow.

"Andrew…" She wept, closing her brown eyes as she felt the gentle touch of his hand. Although just the touch of him always calmed her down whenever she was like this, right now, it didn’t help that much. Just the thought of being touched by Philip again flowed through her being and the memory of last night wouldn’t leave her tortured mind.

"Yes, I’m right here, and I won’t leave you until you order me, Monica," He reassured in his most loving voice,

"Do you want to talk, baby girl?"

"A-Andrew…I’m worth nothing, I’m worth NOTHING!" She sobbed again, burying her face into her pillow again as her best friend only continued to soothe her the best way he knew how,

"The dreams I had last night…they weren’t dreams; they were real. I-I’m worth nothing to you, to Tess and Rose and Carla…Maybe-maybe I should’ve just gone with him last night or else-or else he wouldn’t have tried to r-rape me again…"

"No," Andrew firmly interrupted his friend and, rising to his feet, sat down beside of her curled up form and laid a hand on her shoulder with all the care in the world,

"No, Monica, you didn’t want that-"

"Maybe I didn’t want to…but…maybe it would’ve been for the best, Andrew," She whimpered, her shoulders shaking against Andrew’s touch.

"Monica, please listen to me," Andrew pleaded, tears forming in his compassionate green eyes,

"Please, baby girl." Waiting several moments until she hesitantly turned towards him and their eyes met steadily, the older angel continued,

"Remember what I told you in my note, sweetheart?" Seeing her brown eyes widen at those words, he continued speaking,

"Well, I meant every single word, Monica, and we will get through this. YOU will get through this, and I will be with you through everything. We will have a lot to discuss in a few days when you feel up to it, but I’m telling you right now that you ARE worth something. Don’t listen to those voices, Angel Girl; they will only continue to tear you apart. They’re all lies, but I love you. Tess loves you. Rose and Carla love you. And God loves you, Angel Girl…"

A sob escaping from her throat, Monica couldn’t find her voice as she sat straight up in bed and threw her arms around her best friend’s shoulders. She knew that Andrew would never lie to her, and she had recalled how she had believed every word in his letter the other day. So why shouldn’t she believe him now? But the memories of Philip’s words of how she wasn’t worth anything kept flowing through her mind at lightning speed and kept replacing itself over Andrew’s loving and comforting words. But still, the Irish angel continued to force herself to believe in her very best friend's words of truth.

Tightly clenching him with all her strength, Monica closed her dark eyes that were flooded with hot tears and just melted into her friend’s strong embrace, hoping that he would never let her go again.

*****

"How could you be so STUPID, Philip?!" Denise seethed in anger as she faced the other demon before her. The two demons were standing beside the two embracing angels in the bedroom of the cabin and now after having heard the news from her master that Philip had failed to claim Monica’s soul, Denise was beyond furious. Monica had deserved to have revenge taken upon her after everything she had done all those years ago and now…those stupid angels had won once again??

"You IDIOT!" She shouted, placing her hands against Philip’s chest and giving him a strong push, causing him to stumble backwards,

"You were supposed to DESTROY her! DESTROY HER! You were given a second chance to do that just now and instead, she’s taking comfort from that angel ANDREW!! And she’s believing him! This is all your fault, Philip! You can never complete an assignment and pass it, CAN you?!"

"And just who do you think you are, Denise?" Philip shouted back, standing tall before the dark angel, who would at first appearance seem weak, but he knew that she was anything but. But he was more experienced than her and after her words towards him, he knew that she now had it coming for her,

"You’ve failed assignments too! What about the fire, huh? You were supposed to KILL them, Denise! And you didn’t!"

At his words, the dark-haired demon raised her hand and slapped Philip squarely across the face, but much to her disgust she didn’t receive so much of a cry from him,

"We’re not talking about ME, Philip!"

"Well, now we are!" He seethed, his eyes flashing with evil,

"You’re really pushing it, Denise, do you know that?" Taking a step closer to her, he gripped her tightly by the shoulders and refused to let go,

"And now you’ve asked for it…"

*****

Carla and Tess watched from the doorway of Andrew’s room, not even noticing the two demons who were fighting in the corner. Carla leaned her head against the older angel’s shoulder as she looked at her two friends, her green eyes that were identical to Andrew’s filled with tears.

"He still needs to give it back to her, Tess," Carla whispered, not wanting to disturb the two older angels who were still holding tightly to one another, both sobbing quietly. Lifting her head from the angel’s shoulder, she nodded her head down at Tess’ hand, which was closed into a fist,

"Have you got it with you?"

"Yes, baby, I do," Tess replied, sighing softly,

"But now isn’t the time for him to give the charm bracelet back to her. Our Angel Girl is still in a great deal of pain and is still in a living nightmare at the moment. It will take some more time, but hopefully the time will come very soon for her healing…and she needs to learn to trust in God again, Angel Child. Once she does that…" She didn’t finish the sentence however; instead, she allowed a soft smile to cross her mahogany colored face at the thought of the power of God’s Healing touch.

Chapter 32

"Tess, it’s been two days," Andrew implored, his desperation evident in his green eyes,

"Two days, and she is still having constant nightmares and is still so withdrawn. Every time I try to talk to her, her eyes well up with tears…Tess, we have to do something. I can’t stand seeing her like this! She is still in so much pain…" His own eyes were damp with tears as he thought about his beloved friend.

"I know, baby, I know," Tess sighed, wrapping her arms around her Angel Boy and drawing him close to her,

"and I know how much you love her and so do I."

"I feel like we’re still losing her, Tess," He uttered softly,

"There has to be something more we can do."

Tess sighed softly as she thought and finally gave her head a small nod,

"Carla and Rose have gone out for a bit, baby. Maybe it’s time our girl heard the truth of why all of this occurred. I had wanted to wait until she was feeling stronger, but maybe this is what she needs to hear now. Bring her down, Angel Boy and let’s see if we can get her back."

***

15 minutes later, Andrew led Monica downstairs and over to the couch where Tess already sat. Tess watched as her Angel Girl sat down and huddled up close to Andrew, as if he were the only stable thing she could find to hold onto right now. Her dark eyes, which were red and swollen from so many tears, were downcast.

"Hello, baby." Tess’ warm voice filled the silence as she reached for her youngest charge’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

Monica looked up briefly, tears shimmering in her eyes. She looked as if she might say something, but then changed her mind.

"What is it, Angel Girl?" Her supervisor urged gently, not missing the desperation that was also lingering in the doe-like eyes.

"Tess, I…" Monica’s voice caught in a sob as she felt Andrew’s arms tighten around her protectively,

"Help me, please?" She finally choked out.

Tears filled Tess’ eyes as she moved closer to her charges and laid a hand on Monica’s tear-streaked cheek, which was still showing the bruises from two days ago,

"I need you to listen to me, sweetheart, all right? You’ve heard part of this, but I’m not sure you heard enough to understand, because I don’t think you really understand why any of this happened to you."

"I just want it to go away, Tess…" She whimpered softly.

Tears flooded Andrew’s eyes at the misery in his friend’s trembling voice,

"Listen to Tess, baby girl," He whispered softly into her ear as he kissed the side of her head.

Reaching over, Tess took Monica’s other hand as well, hoping between she and Andrew, Monica would feel safe enough to hear all that she was going to say,

"A while back, Angel Girl, many of the older angels met to discuss some issues that were occurring on various assignments and one of the issues that was brought up, was r*ape cases. Caseworkers were having a lot of problems with some of them. Some of the humans were so far gone in despair that the angels couldn’t reach them, no matter what they did. What was thought was that it was because no angel could truly understand this kind of pain in order to be able to reach through it," Tess stopped to take a breath and to exchange a look with Andrew. Seeing him nod his head, she continued,

"The Father however, refused to allow any of His angels to experience this kind of pain-He didn’t want to put them through it. However, if the choice belonged them, and they chose to intervene, that was a different story. Sweetheart, 500 angels were put in positions similar to the one you were place in on board that ship that night and do you know how many put their own feelings aside to help one of God’s human children?" Seeing Monica shake her head, Tess replied,

"Twenty, baby, you being one of them. It isn’t that the other 480 were bad angels, they were just either afraid or felt interfering would be getting in the way of free will. But twenty of you asked permission to take the pain for that person and the Father granted your request, even though it broke His heart to do so. All twenty of you have had a rough time of it, baby. Angels, like humans, are not always equipped to handle this kind of pain, but you’ve all hung on, some of you by a thread and the Father is so proud of you."

Tears spilled onto Monica’s cheeks as she listened to Tess’ words,

"H..He’s proud of me?" She uttered weakly,

"I thought He’d be so ashamed of me…"

""No, Monica, no," Andrew whispered, as he held her tightly,

"No one is ashamed of you, little one and God loves you, just like He always has; just like we all do."

"When we were on the ship, Angel Girl, I knew you were going to be placed in that position," Tess continued, her voice filled with regret,

"And knowing you as well as I do, I knew what you would chose and I knew how badly you would be affected by that choice. My fear for you caused me to lash out at you and at Andrew and I think a part of me wanted you to be too afraid to intervene was well. I didn’t want you hurt, baby and I knew that heart of yours would be hurt. I should have been thinking of all the good you would do for all those humans in the future once you understood this kind of crime against women. When you’re ready, baby, you’ll be not only Case working, but also spending a little time in Special Forces working these kinds of cases-the tougher cases, where it is harder to reach the women this has happened to, because you understand what this feels like." Tess stopped talking, noticing the overwhelmed expression on the Irish angel’s face,

"What is it, baby?"

Dissolving into tears, Monica shook her head,

"I…I want to help, I do, but…"

"But what, sweetheart?" Andrew urged, rocking her gently in his arms.

"I don’t want to…to feel like this all the time…I can’t, Andrew, I can’t…it hurts too much and I don’t know what to do with it!" Releasing Tess’ hands, she covered her face as she wept.

Quickly, Andrew moved so he could face her and gently pulled her hands away from her face. Cupping her face in his hands tenderly, he looked into her grief-stricken eyes,

"Yes, you do, Angel Girl," He whispered, a loving smile on his face,

"Someone has been waiting to take it from you and all you needed to do was ask, but you were too ashamed to do that. While you’ll always remember, it will be in the back of your mind, to use when you need it, and not this raw pain that you feel now. Monica, won’t you let God take it from you now? Talk to Him, sweetheart. He’s been waiting for you to do just that."

Nodding her head tearfully, Monica reached for his hand, while with her other hand, she took Tess’ hand. Lowering her head, as tears continued to fall, she offered up her trembling voice,

"Father, it’s me, Monica…"

Tess and Andrew exchanged a smile as their dear friend spoke her heart to their Father and once she had finished with her traditional "Love, Monica", they watched as God’s love surrounded her. The bruises on her face, like the ones that had been on Andrew’s face days ago, healed before their eyes. The bandages on her wrists vanished and a peace, which could only be found in knowing just how strongly she was loved, filled her brown eyes.

A soft smile crossed her lips as she closed her eyes briefly,

"Thank you." She whispered, before turning to Tess.

"Welcome back, baby," Tess whispered tearfully, as she enveloped her charge into her arms and held her tightly.

"Thank you, Tess, for telling me why this happened and for loving me so much," Monica replied.

"Yes, I love my babies shamelessly," Tess smiled, reaching beyond Monica to briefly touch Andrew’s cheek, seeing the tears of happiness shining in his eyes as well.

Pulling away from Tess, the Irish angel turned to her best friend, suddenly feeling at a loss for words for the one who had pulled her from Philips’s clutches two days ago, despite the fact that they hadn’t spoken in months due to a misunderstanding. Shyly, she met his green eyes, which were shining with love,

"Andrew…" She began uncertainly, wanting to tell him a million different things at once. Instead, she wrapped her arms around his waist as she kissed his cheek,

"I love you." She whispered, knowing that no other words were really necessary.

Two weeks later…

Andrew smiled as he gave his best friend’s hand another squeeze and continued to help her up the steep hill of the mountain. He and Monica, along with Rose, Tess and Carla, had continued to be given time off from work to just spend whatever time they felt like together. ‘Making up for lost time’ was how Tess had put it earlier on. The angel looked up at the beautiful blue sky above them, his green eyes shining as he saw a snow white dove fly above the mountain top and land, cooing, on a far away tree. It appeared to be looking down at them, as if looking after their every move…but also letting them know that there was peace here in this area and that for now, all of the evil that had surrounded the angels was now gone.

Moments of silence passed between the two younger angels as they continued walking up the hill, but Andrew didn’t miss the looks of love that the little Irish angel kept shooting at him every now and then, which caused him to smile back at her. He had been to this area lots of times in the past few years just to think, and now he wanted to bring Monica here for a certain reason-to give back to her the two things that she had discarded several months ago in the woods after it appeared that their friendship was over and done with.

Finally arriving at the very top, Andrew placed his hand on the small of Monica’s back while ushering her over to the very edge so she could get a good look at the view. Hearing her suck in a deep breath at the sight, Andrew smiled once again.

"Oh Andrew, it’s beautiful," She whispered, taking the sight in with her brown eyes. It was still early in the morning and the sun was still rising far ahead of them, which made it even more beautiful to her,

"Now I see why you wanted me to come here…it’s gorgeous." Feeling her friend wrap a loving arm around her shoulders, Monica responded by circling her own arm tightly around his waist and giving him a squeeze.

"Angel Girl, this isn’t the full reason why I woke you up this early," He chuckled and gave her a squeeze. Noting the look of confusion on her pretty features, the older angel continued,

"I wanted you to see this because it always reminds me of you, baby girl. It brings me peace to know that I can go to it whenever I need to and to think; it can hear me complaining about whatever is on my mind, Monica, and I just love spending time here…just like I love spending time with you. And you’re always here to listen to me, and you bring peace to my heart and soul whenever I’m with you. This view, Angel Girl…" With his free hand, he waved it across the scenery,

"If you weren’t an angel, then I’d say that this is you…"

"Andrew…" Monica choked out as tears threatened her brown eyes. A smile spread across her face as she looked up at her dearest friend, while wrapping her other arm around his waist and leaning into him for a hug. Feeling him embrace her tightly back, this caused another smile of joy and happiness to brighten her features again,
"Andrew, that’s so sweet…"

"It’s the truth, Monica," He whispered back into her ear, feeling his own eyes start to brim with happy tears at finally having things be all right between the two of them,

"And there’s something else, sweetheart."

Pulling back from one another gently, the two friends looked into each other’s eyes, Monica’s eyes filled with questions and wonderment.

"What is it?"

Placing his hand once again on her back and ushering her to sit down on the edge of the mountain so their feet dangled over the edge, Andrew helped her to sit down next to him and held her hand gently in his own. Love shown in his bright green eyes as he looked into his best friend’s brown ones,

"Angel Girl, I want you to have something."

"Andrew, please, you don’t have to give me anything," Monica tried to object, chuckling softly, but the laughter died down as she saw the seriousness in his eyes,

"Are you all right, my friend?"

"Baby, I want you to have something," He repeated, still holding her hand tightly,

"I found it right before I was attacked those few weeks ago." Seeing a flash of sadness start to lurk in her dark eyes, Andrew placed his other hand on her cheek, not allowing that sadness to go any further,

"And I think it’s time for you to have them back, Angel Girl."

Reaching behind him and as if they appeared out of nowhere, the older blonde-haired angel held in his hands now a neatly folded and pressed flannel shirt and right on top of it, laid a silver charm bracelet that still had the many charms intact on them…the same one that he had given to her all those years ago after the disastrous incident on Erin’s front porch.

A small cry of shock escaped Monica’s lips as her eyes laid upon what was in Andrew’s hands. Her hand flew to her mouth, and her mind then traveled back to that day where she had hung up the flannel shirt on a tree branch and put the charm bracelet in its pocket…the day when she was determined that Andrew no longer loved her for who she was; when she had believed that he was going to cast her aside because of what Philip had taken from her.

Tears shown in her eyes as she met them with his loving, green ones,

"Andrew…you found it…"

"Yes, baby girl, I did," He smiled at her, the small dimple in his right cheek showing,

"And since the day you first wore this shirt, it has belonged to you…and it still does, Monica." Laying the shirt on his lap and taking the charm bracelet in his hand, Andrew reached for her wrist and after she had handed it to him, he whispered,

"Allow me."

The two angels sat in silence as Andrew hooked the charm bracelet that had been a gift from him to her so many years ago, back onto his best friend’s right wrist. Giving her hand a squeeze, the Search and Rescue angel lifted her right hand to his lips and laying a soft kiss upon it while meeting her tear-filled brown eyes with his.

"Thank you, my friend," Giving his hand a squeeze in return, Monica released it suddenly and threw both arms around his neck tightly,

"Thank you…"

"It’s my pleasure, Angel Girl," He gave her a tight squeeze in return before they finally released one another and, with no words spoken, Andrew lifted his ex-favorite flannel shirt back into his hands and handed it to his dearest friend again.

Although her hands slightly trembled, Monica took the offered gift from him and into her own hands. Wrapping her arms around the shirt that had always seemed like a comfort to her, since it once belonged to Andrew, Monica then unfolded it and put it on right on top of her blue sweater with her long auburn hair trailing down her back.

Turning back to him and their eyes locking, the two angels smiled at one another and before she knew it, the younger angel was back in her best friend’s warm embrace, her most favorite place to be.

Epilogue

"Honey, stop worrying," Rose chided with a chuckle as she watched Andrew look out the window yet again,

"I’m sure she’ll be back soon."

"She didn’t say where she was going?" Andrew asked once again, already knowing the answer.

Carla shook her head as she laid a gentle hand on his arm,

"Andrew, you can’t worry about her all the time, you know."

"Oh, but I can, Carla," He remarked with a slight grin, before looking out the window once more.

"They’re as bad as each other, Angel Child," Tess explained, shaking her head, a teasing look in her eyes,

"If they aren’t worrying about each other, they just aren’t happy."

"But I have good reason, Tess," Andrew replied, glancing over at her,

"She’ been through a lot this time-."

"And is recovering nicely," Rose reminded him gently as she interrupted,

"God and you have seen to that, Andrew and it has been nice to hear you both laugh again lately."

Andrew smiled as he exchanged a look with his former supervisor,

"It’s been nice to laugh again, Rose and even nicer to hear Monica laugh again after so long. I just wish I knew…" He stopped suddenly, hearing one word spoken to his heart:

"Andrew."

Turning to look back out the window, he saw Monica approaching and while her word to his heart held no fear or despair, there was a look of slight apprehension on her pretty face as she hurriedly approached the cabin,

"Excuse me," He called over his shoulders to his friends as he headed out the front door and closed it behind him.

He saw her look up at him, relief showing in her brown eyes as she raced up the steps and right into his arms. As he wrapped his arms around her tightly, he felt her body relax as she gave a small sigh and rested her cheek up against his chest. He decided against saying anything for a few moments, knowing for the moment, this is what she had been seeking. But as it turned out, there was no need for him to ask.

"I went to see Beth," Monica offered after a minute or two had passed, feeling a calm now beginning to flow through her.

Andrew nodded as he kissed the top of her head,

"Are you okay?"

"I am now," She replied, finally pulling away. Taking his hand, she sat down on the steps and waited for him to do the same,

"I knew I had to see her beings she had come here looking for me that day, but it was more difficult than I thought it would be. When I first saw her, all I wanted to do was turn around, run back here and never look back. But then it got a little easier and I realized something on my way back."

Wrapping his arm around her shoulders to draw her close, Andrew looked into her eyes,

"And what was that, Angel Girl?"

Looking up at him, she smiled a bittersweet smile,

"That despite everything, that night on that ship almost a year ago…I did the right thing. Beth is so sweet and so innocent and I couldn’t imagine that being taken away from her in the way Philip was going to take it," A small shudder ran through her body as she said his name but feeling her friend’s arms tighten around her, she continued,

"And I know that working these assignments will be hard, maybe the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but I know that as long as when the assignment is through, as long as I have the Father’s love and your arms waiting for me, it will be all right."

Feeling tears threaten his eyes, he rested his chin on top of her head,

"And you know you’ll always have both, sweetheart," He replied softly. He knew he would worry about her when she worked in Special Forces on these assignments, but he had known all along how much good she would be to the humans that needed her. She had been where they were and had managed to come back, despite how rough the road had been.

They sat in comfortable silence for a few moments before she spoke up once more,

"I know it is almost time to go back to work, I just wish…" Her voice trailed off as she sighed softly.

"You wish what, baby girl?" He asked curiously.

"I know that you’re happy in Search and Rescue and that is what is most important to me, but sometimes I wish you would go back to Case working, so we could work together more often. I miss that. When you were an AOD, I liked knowing that if I looked over my shoulder, you’d be there."

Andrew chuckled as he moved to look into her eyes,

"You didn’t always like it," He teased, remembering the early days.

Monica joined in his laughter,

"Well, after I got to know you of course," Looking up into his eyes once more, she became more serious,

"And then knew that I wanted you in my existence all the time," Tears filled her eyes as she smiled at him,

"I love you so much, Andrew, and I thank God everyday for you being my friend. I couldn’t have gotten through these last few weeks without you and am so glad I didn’t have to."

Andrew hugged her fiercely to him, always marveling at the fact that no matter what stupid mistakes he may make regarding their friendship, her unconditional love for him never changed,

"You know," He whispered,

"Outside of the Father and His work, there is nothing more important to me than you are, Angel Girl. I just want to make sure you know that."

"I do, because I feel the very same way," She replied softly, closing her eyes for just a moment, content just to be here in his arms as it was the safest place on earth.

"How about a walk?" He asked after a few minutes and he pulled back to look into her face.

"Only if we can go up to your mountain one more time," Monica replied with a smile, watching as he got up and then offered her his hand to help her to her feet.

As he took her hand and they started across the field into the woods, he replied,

"That particular mountain is yours, Angel Girl," Seeing her puzzled look, he continued,

"A long time ago I named it Monica’s mountain as it was the place I went when it was impossible to go to you."

The two angels exchanged a smile and then suddenly looked up as a flock of white doves rose from the trees and ascended into the cloudless blue sky.